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Lockit -> RE: sincerely request advice (11/30/2010 2:06:13 PM)
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I believe that topping from the bottom, most often comes from a manipulative place. Being the type of person I am, I am addressing as much as can be done with time limitations and considerations and there should be no need for anything but a talk if needs aren't being met or there is something on my partner's mind. However, when someone resorts to behavior that implies or implicates them of using manipulation, I don't give second chances and your post OP is proof of why I do not give them.
You first tried to manipulate things to be however it was that you wanted them. You now are trying to manipulate to prove you have changed your ways by showing good behavior that is drummed up by the suggestions (hopefully) of others. Rather than get real, you are trying to convince her. I see that as more manipulative than coming clean, realizing what you have done and mending your ways without trying to play a part of good submissive.
In my eyes, from what you have said here, I don't see that you have changed. Harsh, maybe, but what can one expect when they have allowed themselves to act poorly? Even a small child for the most part knows when they are being bad. I expect far more from an adult.
This isn't the same thing as struggling with an issue of submission, that I could understand and work with. Topping from the bottom is manipulative. It is a conscious effort to get what you want without the accountability of honesty. Learn a lesson, focus on why you would do it or need to do it and get real. An act simply doesn't work in my life. If you can think of ways to manipulate, to top, then you can think of ways to clear things up. It's not rocket science.
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