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graphicsguru1970 -> RE: Married Masters (1/2/2011 1:09:06 PM)
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I think some marrieds don't want a full D/s or BDSM relationship. They only need a bit of kink in their lives. They are quite happy and content with their vanilla wife and life but they need a bit more on the side. I met a man through Yahoo who had a great marriage, but he wanted to give spankings and beltings (without wife's knowledge). He didn't want sex with other women, just wanted to spank and belt them. Would you consider this cheating? I met him two times, but realized that wasn't fulfilling for me so we parted ways.
I had a roommate who was in a very strange relationship. She was sub to a Dom who was not married but had a vanilla gf. He and she were active in the swing community, but she was not submissive, and he was sadistic. My roommate was a masochist. When she met him, his vanilla relationship was going down the tubes. Once he started doing sessions with my roommate, suddenly his vanilla relationship perked up. So it was like, because he had an outlet for his sadism, he was able to focus on other aspects of his vanilla relationship and improve it. But, the vanilla gf never knew he had my roommate for a sub. It was always very hurtful to my roommate that she knew about the gf but the gf did not know about her.
The question for me boils down to this: Are the various people involved OK with their spouse being sexually intimate with someone else? I realize some BDSM relationships do not include sex, and I think that the wife may be more inclined to allow her husband to have, say, a regular spanking partner. He spanks her but he does not have sex with her. (I've attended a few spanking parties and this seemed to be the case: a lot of married men there to spank many bottoms, then go home to the knowing wife.) But I think it's a lot tougher for a wife to accept that her husband is having sex with other women. (This of course, discounts husband and wife who are both open to other partners.)
As for me, I'm a greedy bitch. *chuckles* I want to be numero uno and only in my relationship, even if I am the sub. I've read some of the comments where people have suggested that if the married man is lying to his wife, how can the sub trust that he won't lie to her? I agree. I would also add: How can I submit 100% of myself to a man if he cannot commit 100% of himself to me? Even if this is about D/s and power exchange, it's still a relationship and still a two way street.
Quite honestly, I am amazed that men WANT to juggle more than one woman. Most men I talk with say it takes all their energy to satisfy just one. *laughs*
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