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May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone?


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May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 10:42:40 AM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		I am curious about what it means to different people. Is it the same for everyone?
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 10:49:16 AM   
Senster


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/24/2006
Status: offline 		What "collaring" someone means depends entirely on what the people involved choose for it to mean – that particular collar, in that particular context.

Just for a bit of comparison, let me make the analogy of one person giving another a ring. That, too, depends on context and intent, and even there there are three easily distinguishable levels that immediately spring to mind: it could be just a gift; or it could be an offer of commitment (an engagement ring); or a confirmation of a commitment (a wedding ring).

So just to say "to collar someone" misses out a whole lot of context that is really rather important.

Best wishes,

// Senster

(in reply to MissLily72)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 11:12:25 AM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you so much for your response Senster, I appreciate your time and thoughts. The things you said make perfect sense. I do not want to have misconceived notions about these things. For people familiar with the lifestyle the answer is probably simple. As I am in training I want to develop a clear understanding of the terminology and what it means to others. Thank you again for your answer.

(in reply to Senster)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 11:37:44 AM   
SAMHAIN09


Posts: 207
Joined: 11/8/2010
Status: offline 		From what I understand the collaring ceremony is like a marriage and the collar is like a ring though there is no legal weight to the union. Sometimes a contract is involved as well though it has no legal weight either also a collar need not be used any form of jewelry can be used in its place.

(in reply to MissLily72)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 12:00:43 PM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you so much for your reply Samhaino9. I appreciate your time and your thoughts. I was unaware that there were actually ceremonies for the act. So you see how much I have to learn. Thank you again.

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 12:16:03 PM   
ricken


Posts: 261
Joined: 1/11/2010
Status: offline 		It will mean a lot of things to everyone here, but I think I would like to just express myself on this subject here. I guess I'm more of a Top than a Dom, but when she asked if I ever collared anyone, I did a lot of research and put thought into it.
We are not 24/7, BUT the collar and the act of putting it on does have it's signifacance, both sexual and emotional. she surrenders controll to me, and she looks so damn hot in it....
Before that collar goes on we do perfom a little 2 or 3 minute ceremony of sorts that re-affearms our trust in each other and our commitment to communicat with each other. That fact she allows me to do some of the things I do shows how much trust she has in me. her trust in me is something that I hold in the highest honor, and the fact that sexually I can talk to her about ANYTHING has opened up other lines of communication and trust that is amazing.
So I guess coller = trust + communication

(in reply to SAMHAIN09)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 12:45:24 PM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you Ricken for taking your time to reply. I appreciate it greatly. Your answer is very helpful to me. I especially like this part of your answer. (So I guess coller = trust + communication) Very specific thought from you. I so much appreciate your honesty and your thoughts on this question.

(in reply to ricken)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 2:46:16 PM   
phoenixmoonn13


Posts: 398
Joined: 6/11/2010
Status: offline 		my collar means more than the wedding ring i wore when i was still married. i wear a necklace with a charm that has meaning for us both only taken it off once in over two years when i had to have an operation . and a thumb ring which i have never taken off. we had a private ceremony just us 2 its just an outward symbol of something far deeper and meaningful.

(in reply to MissLily72)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 2:55:15 PM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you phoenix I was hoping a sub would reply as well. Thank you for sharing your feelings about your collar and taking your time to respond, I appreciate it very much.

(in reply to phoenixmoonn13)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 3:10:04 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		to me a collar is nothing more than a fashion accessory.  What MATTERS is what has been determined between the people involved.  teh 'vows' (so to speak) are more important than any external symbol.

thats just me, though.

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to MissLily72)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 3:12:50 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		You've got mail.  LOL.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to GreedyTop)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 3:15:11 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		responded ;)

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 3:32:17 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		And responded again.  

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 4:39:53 PM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		Please note, Lily, that the above answers refer to the classic collar, which is a symbol of an ideally permanent commitment.  HOWEVER, there are other types of collars. There are collars of protection, which I have used on submissives that were not suitable for me but I wanted to guide them safely to a Dom.  There are also training collars, which are almost always a means by which an alleged Dom gets to get his jollies out of playing with a sub with no actual commitment.There are also collars of consideration.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadyPact)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 5:12:19 PM   
MissLily72


Posts: 28
Joined: 12/19/2010
Status: offline 		Thank you all so much. I am new to posting here so please excuse my skills. I put part of this on another post with some other questions before I realized it was probably the wrong place to be asking. To those who responded twice double thank yous :) I feel I have certainly gained some information from you all, it is valuable to me. I appreciate your contributions to the cause. I thank you DarkSteven for the infor on the different collars. It is something I was unaware of as well. I can see that the forums here will be invaluable for me in my quest to become a good slave for my master.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 5:50:15 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		Steven is a good man.  You should listen to him.

Entirely My opinion, of course.


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to MissLily72)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 6:02:20 PM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline 		*pokes LP.. cmail*

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 6:53:26 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Senster
it could be just a gift; or it could be an offer of commitment (an engagement ring); or a confirmation of a commitment (a wedding ring).
Or it could be like a class ring in high school...a kind of "we're going steady" thing.

It's been my experience that most people don't do a collaring ceremony. Most are private little moments.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Senster)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 7:42:32 PM   
littlewonder


Posts: 15659
Status: offline 		For us it just means he owns me..nothing more nothing less. No formal contracts, no ceremony. It means I'm bound to him just like the bracelet is around my wrist.

(in reply to OsideGirl)
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RE: May I ask, what does it mean to you to collar someone? - 12/22/2010 10:04:25 PM   
SAMHAIN09


Posts: 207
Joined: 11/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissLily72

Thank you so much for your reply Samhaino9. I appreciate your time and your thoughts. I was unaware that there were actually ceremonies for the act. So you see how much I have to learn. Thank you again.
No problem any time.

(in reply to MissLily72)
Profile   Post #: 20
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