What BDSM means to you?

What BDSM means to you? (Full Version)

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LoveSparkie -> What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 3:18:31 PM)
People hear the terms BDSM or "the lifestyle" and mostly automatically think "Oh being tied up during sex..ect". In fact I admitted to a friend that I was a submissive and he said "I never took you for someone that liked to be beaten." It aggravates me a bit. I feel its much more then all that. So my question is: What does this lifestyle mean to you? What does the role you play mean to you? Is it all just fun and games for you or much more?

DesFIP -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 4:06:07 PM)
Hey, don't knock being tied up during sex. It is my most favorite thing. Takes me from zero interest in sex to on the boil in seconds flat! I wants me some of that. (He's out of town for a couple of days). Beyond that, it's that we've discussed everything in advance. No unexpressed expectations. Everything got worked out to the best of our ability. Which means there's very little to disagree on since we share a remarkable amount of compatibility.

DarkSteven -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 4:18:14 PM)
I think of D/s being different than BDSM. I think of BDSM as focusing more on activities, while D/s focuses on the mental aspects. Add 'em together, and you have the lifestyle, or at least a lot of it. As a D, it means that I am bigger than myself. I am responsible for myself and for my sub as well. And that I get service from the extra responsibility. And the sex is great.

LoveSparkie -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 7:05:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP Hey, don't knock being tied up during sex.ity. Oh no no, I'm not. I love it too. haha. I'm just saying, there is more to all this than just that.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 7:31:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LoveSparkie So my question is: What does this lifestyle mean to you? Well, you have to understand that We feel BDSM is different than Ms. BDSM, to Us, is a description of actions while Ms is a description of relationship dynamics. Yes, technically, "DS" stand from Dominance and submission, but even that is different than Ms, to Us. quote: What does the role you play mean to you? This is part of Our destiny... to be a Master is a spiritual journey unlike any We've been on (and We've explored a lot). quote: Is it all just fun and games for you or much more? This implies that, if it much more, it can't be fun and games, too. Everything should have, and be done with, joy! Master Fire

littlewonder -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 7:34:52 PM)
lifestyle and roleplay mean nothing at all to me. I don't do either one. I asimply react to a dominant personality man by being submissive towards him for many different reasons.

Missokyst -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 9:23:14 PM)
Yep this gets my vote. quote: ORIGINAL: littlewonder lifestyle and roleplay mean nothing at all to me. I don't do either one. I asimply react to a dominant personality man by being submissive towards him for many different reasons.

AquaticSub -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 9:30:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LoveSparkie So my question is: What does this lifestyle mean to you? What does the role you play mean to you? Is it all just fun and games for you or much more? It really doesn't mean much. It's just me. Nothing more and certainly nothing less. I'm a nutty, foolhardy, bold, insecure, bubbly woman who thrives on kneeling to a dominant man I love. I don't submit and I don't live this because it's kinky, because it's 'better' or 'deeper'. I do this because it fulfills me. Because it is me. Submission isn't simply part of role play in my dynamic (though we do role play in the bedroom), it's a personality trait. A lot of people have great, deep philosophies on BDSM and the lifestyle and they are all well and good. But I don't think this requires more trust. I don't think it requires deeper understanding. I don't think our relationships are more meaningful. That this relationship feels so special, so wonderful is because I am finally in the relationship where I get to be me. That's what this means to me.

LadyPact -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 9:44:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LoveSparkie So my question is: What does this lifestyle mean to you? What does the role you play mean to you? Is it all just fun and games for you or much more? I'm going to get blasted for this. I just know it. For Me, it's the whole spectrum. It can be fun and games. If it wasn't, I probably wouldn't do it anymore. Where else can you sing "if you're happy and you know it" while you're beating someone's ass? I get to do stuff that most people only fantasize about. Then, ask Me what the leather life means to Me and I'll probably have such a heartfelt reaction that the words coming out won't make much sense. I'm not nearly articulate enough to express My thoughts. It's more than I can say on a message board. I just know what it means to Me inside. It doesn't have to be that for everyone. I just know what it is to Me.

AquaticSub -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 9:54:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact For Me, it's the whole spectrum. It can be fun and games. If it wasn't, I probably wouldn't do it anymore. Where else can you sing "if you're happy and you know it" while you're beating someone's ass? I get to do stuff that most people only fantasize about. Well... You could probably do that with some/most of my vanilla friends. But even my vanilla friends are the weird ones. [:D]

LadyPact -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 10:13:19 PM)
True, but would they be naked? [8D]

KnightofMists -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 10:21:44 PM)
I just see BDSM as meaning Kinky play of some sort...... But I do appreciate that many equate it having a D/s aspect to it as well... even though I see it as two seperate concepts that can co-exist rather nicely together. But being able to co-exist doesn't mean they are always there in every given situation.... some are situations is just kinky play or just some sort of authority power transfer. It doesn't have to be both.

AquaticSub -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 10:50:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact True, but would they be naked? [8D] Quite possibly.

LadyPact -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 11:05:12 PM)
In that case, I'm thinking your friends could be friends of Mine.[:)]

AquaticSub -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/22/2010 11:26:06 PM)
peers around sneakily Ask them their thoughts on carrots and get back to me about what they said... Also how many people have to be in a room without their shoes on to constitute an orgy. [:D][:D][:D]

princedorian -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/23/2010 3:39:30 AM)
It is a state of mind, I suppose. The one when you feel pleased while being (in my case) humiliated or ordered around by someone else, someone you call your master, or longing for it. It's a willingful act of offering your body, your mind to someone else, even if its for a short period of time. It can be fun, serious, therapeutic, addictive, but to me the element of giving yourself up is the crucial one.

BonesFromAsh -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/23/2010 3:51:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LoveSparkie So my question is: What does this lifestyle mean to you? It doesn't. BDSM, for me, simply implies activities...bondage, disipline...and "roles" (top/bottom-giver/receiver)...sadism, masochism. I know there are folks who like to have a certain amount of mystique around these activities/roles, but this isn't what it is for me. Also, as others have said, I see the activities of BDSM as being, at times, seperate from the dynamics of D/s or M/s. quote: What does the role you play mean to you? I identify as a switch so my "role"...top or bottom...depends greatly on the energy between myself and my partner. quote: Is it all just fun and games for you or much more? It can be...or not, depending on many different contributing factors. This isn't a "lifestyle" for me.

sunshinemiss -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/23/2010 4:27:02 AM)
The sunny award goes to: Lady Pact: Yes, folks there it is... Sunny Quote of the Day: [sm=cute.gif] Where else can you sing "if you're happy and you know it" while you're beating someone's ass? Congragulations, please redeem your prize at the door.

sunshinemiss -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/23/2010 4:28:03 AM)
The sunny award goes to: Lady Pact: Yes, folks there it is... Sunny Quote of the Day: [sm=cute.gif] Where else can you sing "if you're happy and you know it" while you're beating someone's ass? Congragulations, please redeem your prize at the door.

mbes -> RE: What BDSM means to you? (12/23/2010 6:18:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub It really doesn't mean much. It's just me. Nothing more and certainly nothing less. I'm a nutty, foolhardy, bold, insecure, bubbly woman who thrives on kneeling to a dominant man I love. I don't submit and I don't live this because it's kinky, because it's 'better' or 'deeper'. I do this because it fulfills me. Because it is me. A lot of people have great, deep philosophies on BDSM and the lifestyle and they are all well and good. But I don't think this requires more trust. I don't think it requires deeper understanding. I don't think our relationships are more meaningful. That this relationship feels so special, so wonderful is because I am finally in the relationship where I get to be me. That's what this means to me. I was all set to start typing, when I realized this works about as well as anything I could say.

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