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Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 9:36:53 AM

LoveSparkie

Posts: 56
Joined: 12/17/2010
Status: offline

This could be anything dealing with the lifestyle or other things. Sexual or not.

Mine:

1. Harming my children or questioning my parenting skills. I am a Mama Bear.

2. Serious bodily harm, anything that would inflict extreme pain. Slight pain is ok, but serious pain in my opinion is a bodies way of telling you to stop. I'm speaking of thing that can cause serious damage.

3. My hair - I've heard some submissives have no problem with their Masters practically giving them a buzzcut...I would cut his dick off.
My hair is what makes me feel feminine. Strip me of what makes me feel like a woman and I'll strip you of what makes you feel like a man. (Damn, I sound crazy.)

4. Anything public (on the internet or in real life). I have children and a family. I respect them too much to let them see mommy (or whatever relationship I have with them) in a compromising position.

5. Having any and all privacy stripped from me or being told I don't have a choice in anything. I've had men try this before, I'm a human being..I have rights.

What are yours?

_____________________________

"You'll never know the good with out the bad.
It's not until you experience pain that you will know pleasure.
It's not until you experience heartbreak that you will know true love.
It's when you face death, that you truly love life."
~Sparkie~

Post #: 1

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 11:06:18 AM

allthatjaz

Posts: 2878
Joined: 8/20/2008
Status: offline

Because BDSM comes under the heading, Safe, Sane and consensual. I don't see harming your children as anything to do with BDSM and I don't see public displays that brings in other un-consensual people as BDSM either.
I no longer have limits because I know my partner well enough to understand he is safe and sane and that he would do absolutely nothing that would cause me trauma.
In my early days with him I had restrictions (within BDSM) and they were polythene bags over my head or fabric over my head, thumping me in the face and kicking. Never being dominated by a woman because I would have to kill her afterward and no gang bangs. Oh and scat.

_____________________________

S&M (Steve and Maria) persona libre de convencionalismos

Fan of edgeplay.co.uk

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 2

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 11:11:13 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Anything that causes physical, mental or emotional harm. And anything that puts distance between us, that weakens the relationship rather than strengthening it.

No inverted suspension because of my vertigo.
No duct tape gags, or indeed anywhere on my skin, as it sets off a panic attack.
No humiliation because it makes me distrust him.
And other things as we come across them.

But really, do I have to specify he can't kill off my elderly father so we can get the estate? Or the teen, just because he's 17 and waiting for him to grow up is getting old?

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to allthatjaz)

Post #: 3

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 11:14:48 AM

soul2share

Posts: 7084
Joined: 12/18/2007
From: somewhere out there.....
Status: offline

Mine are pretty much the extreme things, no scat, urine, blood, needles. Nothing illegal, and a few special things...no tickling, no breast torture and no woman to woman contact. I've had one dom try to tell me he was going to use the last one as punishment for some bullshit thing I said that he took the wrong way, but I think it was just any excuse for him to try it. Needless to say, I walked, no make that RAN, in the other direction and never looked back. He said it was a mindfuck, I said it was a breach of trust. He never did get it!

Anything that may cause mental or physical trauma is what I consider out of bounds. It may be something that right now isn't a problem, but it's only because I haven't tried it. Things change.....nothing ever stays the same.

_____________________________

I have to stop saying "How stupid can you be?"...people are starting to take it as a challenge!

*Not a fuck was given.*

(in reply to allthatjaz)

Post #: 4

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 11:28:48 AM

gungadin09

Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline

KNOWN LIMITS:

permanent marks or scars- hard limit

nonpermanent marks or scars on the face or lower arms (visible)- hard limit

vaginal penetration without a condom- hard limit

calling Someone "Daddy"- hard limit

calling me "stupid"- soft limit

interfering with my job in any way- hard limit

asking me to do anything illegal- hard limit

asking me to do anything that embarasses a third party, or otherwise forces them to participate in a dynamic they haven't consented to- hard limit

making major life decisions for me (where i live, where i work, whether i go to school)- hard limit

telling me what to think- hard limit; (telling me what to do is, or course, not a limit)

asking me to do anything that requires money- soft limit

casual sex- soft limit

extroversion- soft limit

LIMITS THAT I CONSIDER COMMON SENSE:
lying, or being lied to
playing with anyone who's married and whos spouse doen't know
putting me in the hospital
gossip; lack of discretion
sex with animals, minors, or dead people, which, of course, also falls under the category of things that are illegal

pam

< Message edited by gungadin09 -- 12/24/2010 11:29:28 AM >

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 5

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 11:30:48 AM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

women who spit.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to gungadin09)

Post #: 6

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 12:03:18 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline

Technically a lot of bdsm is considered illegal. You can't consent to being beaten or battered or anything the law considers assault.

I have hard limits against things that are bad for me, or my health or my self esteem, either directly or indirectly, anything else I just say it like it is, they're not hard limits, because those are things bad for my health, mental emotional or pysichal or my esteem, if it's not something that falls under that catagory, but I am unwilling to do it, I simply say I just aint doing it cause I don't like it end of story.

_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 7

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 12:08:25 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

quote:

women who spit.

As opposed to swallowing?

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 8

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 12:11:31 PM

kalikshama

Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline

Thanks for saving me some typing!

quote:

ORIGINAL: gungadin09

KNOWN LIMITS:

permanent marks or scars- hard limit

nonpermanent marks or scars on the face or lower arms (visible)- hard limit

vaginal penetration without a condom- hard limit

calling Someone "Daddy"- hard limit

calling me "stupid"- soft limit

interfering with my job in any way- hard limit

asking me to do anything illegal- hard limit

asking me to do anything that embarasses a third party, or otherwise forces them to participate in a dynamic they haven't consented to- hard limit

making major life decisions for me (where i live, where i work, whether i go to school)- hard limit

telling me what to think- hard limit; (telling me what to do is, or course, not a limit)

asking me to do anything that requires money- soft limit

casual sex- soft limit

extroversion- soft limit

LIMITS THAT I CONSIDER COMMON SENSE:
lying, or being lied to
playing with anyone who's married and whos spouse doen't know
putting me in the hospital
gossip; lack of discretion
sex with animals, minors, or dead people, which, of course, also falls under the category of things that are illegal

pam

(in reply to gungadin09)

Post #: 9

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 12:12:37 PM

littlewonder

Posts: 15659
Status: offline

None

I have no need of any with him because I trust him completely. I wouldn't be with him if I didn't.

(in reply to kalikshama)

Post #: 10

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 12:18:12 PM

Toppingfrmbottom

Posts: 6528
Joined: 6/7/2009
Status: offline

I guess either way I am safe from Ron, bwahahaha.

_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

(in reply to littlewonder)

Post #: 11

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 1:01:07 PM

mbes

Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline

I can't think of any with my other half. There are things I don't want to do, but he knows what I'm capable of, so wouldn't ask what I can't do.
With anyone else, the list would be a mile long, to make sure I covered everything conceivable.

(in reply to Toppingfrmbottom)

Post #: 12

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 2:09:34 PM

MaxsGirl

Posts: 355
Joined: 12/2/2010
From: The Arctic Circle
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mbes

I can't think of any with my other half. There are things I don't want to do, but he knows what I'm capable of, so wouldn't ask what I can't do.
With anyone else, the list would be a mile long, to make sure I covered everything conceivable.

Same here. Anything that would be a hard limit for me (sex with minors or animals, for example) isn't something he'd ask me to do. Anything else is fair game.

_____________________________

Property of rubbrdsir

Collared Fox and
Future Thru-Hiker!

(in reply to mbes)

Post #: 13

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 2:15:26 PM

rulemylife

Posts: 14614
Joined: 8/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

women who spit.

If they chew tobacco they have to. Swallowing that is unhealthy.

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 14

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 2:15:32 PM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

Death

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 15

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 3:02:41 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

We haven't found any limits in all the years we've been together. We didn't even discuss the subject. There just hasn't been any need to. He was my best friend for years before he owned me, so there was nothing I wouldn't have trusted him with by the time he took me, anyway.

We really rather like each other; limits aren't a subject that needs raising. He's not going to hurt me, fuck me up or do anything that'd diminish something he's been raising up for years.

Of course I can think of trillions of things that'd be a hard limit if he went so bonkers that I felt I had to say *no* to something...the first of which would be * No owning me if you're bonkers*.

agirl

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 16

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 5:41:20 PM

Whiplashsmile4

Posts: 2305
Joined: 12/2/2008
Status: offline

Diapers is one of mine!!! Hell no way in Hell!!! Just creeps me the hell out personally...

_____________________________

Жизнь ума ебет.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nUzJI4Palq0

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 17

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 6:40:33 PM

BeingChewsie

Posts: 1633
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline

Leaving the relationship.

_____________________________

"In fact, it is my contention that most women are accepting of way less than optimal circumstance constantly, and are lucky to be 'snagged' by the right man, if ever. But it is more by happy accident than by their design. "
~Ron and Hup

(in reply to LoveSparkie)

Post #: 18

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 6:47:53 PM

agirl

Posts: 4530
Joined: 6/14/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeingChewsie

Leaving the relationship.

How is that a hard limit?...Isn't that a consequence? I mean , would you stay with someone , no matter what?

agirl

(in reply to BeingChewsie)

Post #: 19

RE: Your HARD LIMITS - 12/24/2010 7:14:46 PM

anniezz338

Posts: 1183
Joined: 8/17/2010
Status: offline

Yea, the diapers...not for me. Electricity, broken bones, must watch Hell's Kitchen and House, my family time (very important)....and like agirl said, no bonkers.

_____________________________

I had become insane, with horrific lapses of sanity. Edgar Allen Poe

(in reply to agirl)

Post #: 20

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