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Thoughts - 12/26/2010 1:21:03 AM

Termyn8or

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Over the years I've learned a few things here. I suspected but now I'm sure that submission is not a sign of weakness by any stretch of the imagination. I am a switch, dominant in nature, and I like to submit sometimes. I've given thought to what that means. In that direction, I thought "why would anyone submit ?". Really, I am quite dominant in just about every aspect of life, but some times............

What does submitting mean to me ? After some introspection I may have some answers. No matter how young you might be, you might long for the good old days. I do. How many are actually tired of being an adult ? The time in the past there were less responsibilities and less problems. Someone took care of us. Kept us from harm.

In that process for our own good sometimes we were restrained. Can't get out of that stroller. You are basically tied up, and in the early years how different is a diaper from a chastity belt ? Are submissives trying to recreate the past ? Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with this. What happens behind closed doors between consenting adults is all good, no matter what is happeniong to their minds. If it is what we seek and what we want, and it hrms none, do as thou wilt. I certainly wilt.

Since I was young, I've read about bank presidents who hire people to literally tie them to whipping posts and of course, whip them. These are business people, sharp and on the spot, able to think on their feet. Able to leap a hundred thousand in a single keystroke. But they have this need within them.

I say that it is a vacation for them. They welcome being out of control for a time. Let their brain idle for a while. Control means responsibility, and they know it. Then they willingly give up their precious control, to shed that responsibility. As each restraint is applied, they feel more and more free. Believe me I know.

I have been offered positions of authority a few times. I could be boss, but I turned it down. Life is a bitch enough. My Father was the same in that respect, he was offered promotions many times and turned them down. His attitude was like "No, it's enough of a bitch to work here, no way am I going to run the place". I see that in me. I could take command of a business right now, only money I would have to come up with is payroll and bills and they would hold the paper. I won't do it, at least not alone. But then partners are a pain in the ass. I found in business that there must be only one boss. One person with the old cliche-ish plaque on their desk that says "The buck stops here".

My kind realizes that with authority comes responsibility, I don't take that lightly. You tie my ass up and all that, I am not in control, and therefore I am absolved of all rsponsibility.

A vacation.

Who else sees it this way ?

T

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 10:04:40 AM

IrishMist

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I can almost...not quite...but almost understand where you are going with this. However, you forgot something. From what I can understand in what you wrote here, most of this would mainly only apply to those who switch or those who only 'scene'.

What about those who are 100% submissive in nature, and those who are in no way submissive but still 'submit' within their chosen relationships? I don't see them as attempting to recapture that feeling of safety from their youth or taking a 'vacation' from their everyday lives.

In addition, what about people like me? Who are NOT submissive, but get off on actually being forced to submit?

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 10:07:11 AM

kalikshama

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quote:

I say that it is a vacation for them. They welcome being out of control for a time. Let their brain idle for a while. Control means responsibility, and they know it. Then they willingly give up their precious control, to shed that responsibility. As each restraint is applied, they feel more and more free. Believe me I know.

It's soooooo nice to surrender control!

(in reply to Termyn8or)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 10:13:06 AM

mbes

Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
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Every time I think I have myself figured out, and know why I want what I want, I find an exception or clue that I am wrong.
I've about decided that I am, in fact, just crazy in my own little way.
I'm happy (enough), though, so I suppose I'll just have to live with it.

(in reply to kalikshama)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 12:58:13 PM

littlewonder

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I'm never absolved of responsibility even when bound. I'm still responsible for the way I act, the way I move, my motivations, my giving up of responsibility to him, etc....

(in reply to mbes)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 1:31:57 PM

sexyred1

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OP, I don't find what you have written to be that unusual, in fact, it is pretty much the case for most submissive people that I know, men and women.

Those of us who are in high impact/stress/authority jobs, do like to lose the responsibility for a little while. But it is not the genesis of how I feel; I felt this submissive interest, and interest in bondage, even as a child where I had no responsibilities or stress.

For me, though it is not so much loss of responsibility, I just simply have a desire to be taken over by someone for a particular period of time. Bondage helps that, but it is not necessarily.

In fact, someone who can take me over without bondage is even better.

(in reply to littlewonder)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/26/2010 4:25:13 PM

mysouldesire

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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

OP, I don't find what you have written to be that unusual, in fact, it is pretty much the case for most submissive people that I know, men and women.

Those of us who are in high impact/stress/authority jobs, do like to lose the responsibility for a little while. But it is not the genesis of how I feel; I felt this submissive interest, and interest in bondage, even as a child where I had no responsibilities or stress.

For me, though it is not so much loss of responsibility, I just simply have a desire to be taken over by someone for a particular period of time. Bondage helps that, but it is not necessarily.

In fact, someone who can take me over without bondage is even better.

OP..... I could barely get through your thoughts....
and sexyred is a total different sort of submissive breed that I am if this is her type of submission..............

just as you might have no other way to behave or think is dominant.....
i have no other way to think or behave than submissively and I have to many times remind myself that "they (a specific person) are NOT a person I want to please!"

Submission can be learned or natural....this too can be as debated as the gift theory of submission.

(in reply to sexyred1)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/27/2010 7:02:26 AM

NuevaVida

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I'm never absolved of responsibility even when bound. I'm still responsible for the way I act, the way I move, my motivations, my giving up of responsibility to him, etc....

Ditto this.

I have an intense job in which I have to think on my feet and make critical decisions. Submitting to my owner is not a "vacation" or even relief from my job. I know others for which this is the case, but it is not something I relate to. For me, submitting to him is my way of expressing myself within an intimate relationship. It is how I express my love and care and appreciation. It is how I thrive. Add to that, his power over me turns me on. But there is no switching gears for me, from work to home. It's just various facets of myself being naturally expressed in their appropriate contexts.

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RE: Thoughts - 12/27/2010 8:04:59 AM

sexyred1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mysouldesire

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

OP, I don't find what you have written to be that unusual, in fact, it is pretty much the case for most submissive people that I know, men and women.

Those of us who are in high impact/stress/authority jobs, do like to lose the responsibility for a little while. But it is not the genesis of how I feel; I felt this submissive interest, and interest in bondage, even as a child where I had no responsibilities or stress.

For me, though it is not so much loss of responsibility, I just simply have a desire to be taken over by someone for a particular period of time. Bondage helps that, but it is not necessarily.

In fact, someone who can take me over without bondage is even better.

OP..... I could barely get through your thoughts....
and sexyred is a total different sort of submissive breed that I am if this is her type of submission..............

just as you might have no other way to behave or think is dominant.....
i have no other way to think or behave than submissively and I have to many times remind myself that "they (a specific person) are NOT a person I want to please!"

Submission can be learned or natural....this too can be as debated as the gift theory of submission.

I am not a "breed" of anything, including submissive. I am a woman and being submissive is just one facet of myself.

I don't appreciate your commenting on who you THINK I am vs. what I SAID. You may be new to the message boards so you would be better served to note that replying to someone's post is recommended vs. making a judgement on what "breed" that person is.

Lastly, your comments indicate that you are judging another's submissive stance against your own. Being "one true way" is also frowned up on here.

< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 12/27/2010 8:07:34 AM >

(in reply to mysouldesire)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/27/2010 8:57:26 AM

kdsusa7894

Posts: 193
Joined: 12/19/2010
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I would have to say for myself, part of the attraction is the fact that I can submit and not have to be in control for a time. I am thinking I would like that part of it. Tell me what you want me to do so I don't have to figure it out on my own, but at the same time I like Irishmist's comment about NOT being submissive but liking the fact that I would have to be forced into it, that holds an appeal all it's own also. Hmmm, more facets.......

And it seems to me the more I read these posts, the more I understand that the concept is individual to every person, it's your own and your partners way of seeing things and deciding what works for you both. There is no cut and dried, tried and true dynamic, it is individualized for each dynamic and relationship.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val To Aqua- Thanks!
Seduce my mind and you can have my body, find my soul and I'm yours forever...

(in reply to sexyred1)

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RE: Thoughts - 12/29/2010 4:59:53 AM

CherryNeko

Posts: 330
Joined: 12/29/2010
From: Mexico City
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I think it depends on the person, but yes, it may be all of what you said. Everything in someone's life has to do with it. It's not just one thing, and not the same for everyone, but I believe every single experience, desire, memory... contributes to it.

(in reply to Termyn8or)

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