RE: Orgasm Denial

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/4/2011 6:39:39 PM

Darkfeather

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darkfeather
Actually, I have had some success with orgasm denial, with female subs. The key is to work up to the point of orgasm, then stave of the orgasm until allowed. I once had a very determined sub who could do full vibrator stimulation for hours at peak stimulation until I told her she could, and she really hated me. She was also the only one I knew who could go into subspace this way

That's not denial. That's control. Denial means not at all, usually not for weeks or months at a time.

Control is about waiting until permitted, and is usually restricted to a period of hours.

Then by that definition Orgasm Denial is but a subset of Orgasm Control. Because by definition, denying an orgasm is controlling it

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/5/2011 4:15:02 AM

DesFIP

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You want to make up your own words like Humpty Dumpty, go for it. If you want to talk to others about what you do, then you need to use the words that they will understand. There is a clearly understood distinction between control and denial. If you mean one, but use the other, expect people not to be able to answer the questions you wanted answered but instead the one you actually posed.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/5/2011 4:46:30 AM

Darkfeather

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

You want to make up your own words like Humpty Dumpty, go for it. If you want to talk to others about what you do, then you need to use the words that they will understand. There is a clearly understood distinction between control and denial. If you mean one, but use the other, expect people not to be able to answer the questions you wanted answered but instead the one you actually posed.

I clearly didn't make up any words, I just stated my point. I apologize if I wasn't clearer, but my statement stands, Orgasm Denial is merely a subset of Orgasm Control. If this is a false statement then I stand corrected. But if it is true, then because denial is a subset control, it is reasonable to assume talking about one would correlate to the other, and the distinction would be in the context of the statement

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/5/2011 6:10:30 AM

ranja

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I personally quite cherish the denial game... at times it is lovely to be taken straight there of course... especially when we might be pressed for time, but when a whole evening or better still a few days can be used for sexy time it is definitely true that the longer it takes for me to cum the sweeter the final release...
Longer than a week and i would probably try to take matters in my own hands, but if we get too close too soon and lose control it might feel like a bit of a cheat or dissappointment sometimes... especially since my lust for sex takes a dive immediately after orgasm and i need quite a bit of winding up again to get the heat back...
i have not experienced the multiple cum phenomena and i much doubt that anybody could ever manage to make me cum on demand just like that

but to be made to feel really dirty by putting off my orgasm, well... mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, just lovely...........

So it seems to me the *training* is all yours master... learn how to *play* your toy, listen to her music.

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/5/2011 2:15:42 PM

GotSteel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP
You want to make up your own words like Humpty Dumpty, go for it. If you want to talk to others about what you do, then you need to use the words that they will understand. There is a clearly understood distinction between control and denial. If you mean one, but use the other, expect people not to be able to answer the questions you wanted answered but instead the one you actually posed.

I don't know about that, I really can't think of many BDSM terms with clearly understood definitions around here. Some squabbling over whose definition is the correct one seems to be the norm on collarchat.

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RE: Orgasm Denial - 1/6/2011 1:46:53 AM

Awareness

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quote:

ORIGINAL: daintydimples
Control (with females) is quite different. Before you can control a female's orgasm, you must be an expert on how to make her come. True orgasm control means having your sub/slave come at your command. Guess what? This will not happen overnight. It could take months, even years.

If you're going to try and condition them into it, then yes.

If you're going to address their mind directly, then probably not. Conditioning is a crude methodology. Rapport, double-binds, synesthesia and use of trance states is going to get you there more quickly. It's also mandatory to deal with any baggage which may be inhibiting the ability to orgasm. Such tension is also usually expressed in her physiology and is amenable to both massage and the elimination of beliefs which do not serve her.

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Post #: 26