RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it?

RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (Full Version)

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LadyNTrainer -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/21/2011 10:00:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze I was only there as a guest and the host always seemed to set the tone, with the added complication that not everybody was in the know about what is going on, one submissive I had with me couldn't kneel on the floor due to having had surgery after a sport accident, so I asked if he could have a pillow for him and explained the problem, gawd, you would have thought I tried to murder somebody's baby or tried to drink from the finger bowl.... That was possibly the worst one... Other one was where nobody explained to us or just me that the submissives all have certain roles and it was all very choreographed.... That version of HP would not work for me at all. I'm not a stereotyped cardboard cut-out from a fetish magazine, and I don't do things the same way everyone else does. Actually there are some pretty profound differences in my D/s style and how I run my household that make us not hugely compatible with the classic femdom stereotypes. Add a refusal on the part of the host to recognize real and serious medical limitations in a submissive, and we'd be out of there. In fairness I've never personally run into a situation where medical limits weren't immediately respected; I think most people get that kink has to stop where actually endangering someone's health and well being starts. The ones who don't get this really worry me.

LadyConstanze -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/21/2011 11:56:14 AM)
Maybe I should have told them before, but to be honest it never crossed my mind that this would be an event where the slaves who aren't serving had to kneel behind their dominants, it was an invitation to a meal for people into BDSM. I don't know if they considered it my fault that I brought somebody who wasn't completely recovered from a surgery, or if they thought we weren't respecting their way of doing things... The dynamic simply didn't work for me, I have an idea on how I like things done, what pleases me and how I want to handle things, didn't work the same way with them, it was overly structured for my liking and to be honest, I felt like I stumbled into some obscure movie set where the whole cliches were played up to the hilt. I'll be the first one to say that if somebody craves super high protocol as a dynamic, we won't be a good fit, outside of play time, I'd get annoyed if somebody is kneeling around, had that once and it wasn't funny, fell over the guy twice, once with a cup of coffee and had to clean and paint that wall again!

LillyBoPeep -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/21/2011 2:55:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact quote: ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep To anyone willing to answer, what is high protocol to you? Is it something that's more reserved for events (both threads have mentioned it in terms of Dominant's Dinners) or are there aspects that apply to daily life? Do you employ rituals like kneeling or mantras? Do you even consider rituals to be high protocol? We do have a high protocol dynamic. Yes, I do consider rituals to be a part of that. Participation in such is a requirement in My household. We have both morning and evening rituals for when we are together or when we are apart. We have a greeting ritual for those occasions when clip is in the house and I am coming home. We have a ritual that is specifically for changing collars from one to the other (leather to every day and also the reverse). We also have a lot of leather protocols in our home, such as not sitting on furniture without permission and asks My permission to leave a room. Drinks are served from a kneeling position, glass in the palm of the hand, offered up. Food is served to Me first and he will eat while sitting at My feet. In the home, he doesn't call Me anything but Mistress. (There have been two occasions where he has had to use My real name due to circumstances beyond his control in public.) Anytime we are together, he kneels to put on My shoes. Of course, we adjust all of this for situations like dining out or other times we are mixed with the vanilla public. He does sit at the table in restaurants and he doesn't kneel at My feet in the mall. All of the things that have been discusses on the recent manners/gentlemen threads are still requirements in public. Opening doors, carrying packages, taking the 'gentleman's side of the street' and so on. When mixed with the lifestyle crowd, he is expected to follow leather protocols, even when not especially dealing with leather people. At events or times we're in the homes of other D/s or M/s folks, our protocols for the home are used the majority of the time, unless they specifically contradict the protocols of the situation. Thanks for that great answer LadyPact. ^_^ something to ponder. I like the structure and control of protocol like this; most of the people in the community here aren't really into protocol it seems so there isn't really anyone to ask about it.

BonesFromAsh -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/21/2011 11:58:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SthrnCom4t No worries re: hijack....let's enjoy where the conversation goes :) Thank you. I love the example you gave of the smoked fish conversation. Speech restrictions can be a challenge when you have something to offer that could be relevant. Challenging but worth it when wanting to please your partner and make them proud. quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact One of the major differences between a vanilla formal dinner and a leather high protocol dinner is your seating chart. Leather protocols have a lot of basis in seniority and that is the way you seat your guests. This makes it easier for the servers to serve people in proper succession. LadyPact, I have to admit, I wasn't aware of another thread...my apologies for my oversight. The leather aspect of this type of dinner/event has me curious as to any other different protocols that would apply. I'm heading over to the thread you mentioned to do some reading. I've always enjoyed the "stuffiness" of formal dinners, regardless if my role was as a guest or somewhere behind the scene, and I would love the opportunity to be part of this type of function....most likely in the submissive position. toddles off to do some reading [;)]

LadyPact -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/22/2011 1:10:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh LadyPact, I have to admit, I wasn't aware of another thread...my apologies for my oversight. The leather aspect of this type of dinner/event has me curious as to any other different protocols that would apply. I'm heading over to the thread you mentioned to do some reading. I've always enjoyed the "stuffiness" of formal dinners, regardless if my role was as a guest or somewhere behind the scene, and I would love the opportunity to be part of this type of function....most likely in the submissive position. toddles off to do some reading [;)] Not a problem, Bones. Even on the other thread, the post that I made was the short version. I know I missed a lot. I'm just glad to see that some folks have an interest in the topic.

Steponme73 -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/23/2011 1:20:26 PM)
I would imagine that a HP dinner is kind of like attending a state dinner or other formal event. Maybe a little more kinky than a formal dinner. Peon is right about the tux thing. I am not a formal person persay, but put me in a tux and I have a complete different attitude. The ritual thing I can see really well. I think Lady Pact talked about it a little bit. The formality of the leather community has years of tradition... probably the most knowledgeable here on this board is probably Lady Pact. I woulde be interested in other rituals that other dominant ladies employ in their households.

Zevar -> RE: High Protocol...What do you get from it? (1/23/2011 4:57:59 PM)
quote: LadyPact: I always tell people, if you've never experienced a high protocol event, it's something you may want to consider trying. You never know. You might just fall in love with it. QFT

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