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Lockit -> RE: looking for my dominatrix (1/24/2011 10:52:46 AM)
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The thing is, it's romantic to think that you can find someone that completes you... but really that isn't much more than a romantic thought and it isn't realistic. Expecting someone to fix you up, to fit into your life as you are without fixing yourself up, defeating yourself and expecting too much that you owe yourself, isn't realistic. We don't have to be perfect, but we darn well need to polish ourselves up. It isn't that someone cannot complete certain things in our life because they can and do... but we have to be working as a whole person.
Wanting someone and focusing on certain aspects, not willing to do the work to get someone... will hinder our search and relationships will suffer. We can't think our wounds/experiences make us special and less should be expected of us. We can't diminish submission or the submissive by being helpless and thinking all we have to do is be there and someone will do what we want and need.
Doing so, will keep people from us and run them off because most are seeking someone that has done their emotional homework and have worked out some things on their own. Complaining that it isn't happening is proof at least to me, that someone hasn't done some emotional homework and self refinement.
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