RE: male orgasm (Full Version)

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hipsterkittyxo -> RE: male orgasm (1/25/2011 6:37:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

Lots of medications can make it difficult to orgasm. Some antidepressants are known for their sexual side effects. Is he taking any prescription drugs? Or recreational, for that matter?


no :( he has never done any drugs recreationally, and he doesn't even drink. he used to be on lexapro, but he's not on anything anymore. he like insists it's just that he's that unhealthy, so I'm just going to seriously talk to him about going to the doctor.




xssve -> RE: male orgasm (1/26/2011 6:00:37 AM)

So be a porn star for him, let him fuck you and jack off on your face, or try mutual masturbation.

I'm really not joking, I have been out only sporadically over the last 8 years, due to my family situation, I have a special need child, and I can't just go the bar on a Friday night, and I have a prostate condition that the Dr. literally prescribed "frequent ejaculation" for, so badaboom, badabing, internet porn to the rescue.

Not actually as fun as it sounds, it can be kind of a chore actually, only a couple of your senses are engaged, as opposed to all five, and there isn't any emotional attachment, which adds a whole other dimension - anyway, the point of the whole story was, after jacking off so much, I started to fantasize about jacking off, lol, and even a partner for mutual masturbation would have been a huge improvement - it's safe sex, and the whole bugaboo about it is pretty silly - you'll risk getting knocked up by a guy, but you won't jill off in front of him?

Anyway, he may simply have become accustomed to a certain type/level of stimulus, physical or mental, people are creatures of habit - you said, he went without for a while, how long?

Even in cases of severe porn internet addiction, a couple of weeks layoff seems to be enough to "reboot", maybe try longer - 30 days is supposed to be the amount of time it takes to make or break a habit.

If he has no trouble getting erection, I'm not sure why he can't take care of you and then finish himself - I've done that before, chafing is very annoying and painful, unless you get off on pain, and if sex is making you averse to sex, you probably ought to be trying something else. Men are led to believe that we're supposed to last forever, but not all women can handle that, I think the average time for sexual intercourse is like 15 minutes. My last sub was multiorgasmic, and had a cunt like vise: I was starting form a love/hate relationship with sex.

If you do Jill off with him, try vitamin E oil, it might help with the chafing issue, or apply it before sex. If he resists, play it up, you really want him to jack off  for you, etc., and pay attention to what he does, you might learn a trick or two, hell for that matter, let him go back to porn if that's what he needs to get off.

Anyway, sounds complicated, good luck.




RCdc -> RE: male orgasm (1/26/2011 7:11:28 AM)

Everyone has been so incredibly kind.[&:]

If this was role reversal, a post like this on here and the guy would be getting so much schtick by now about not putting too much pressure on regardless of dom or s-type ...

OP... sex isn't just about the orgasm. Yeah that orgasm is cool an all, but if he isn't bothered, then you shouldn't be either. If the sex is great, the quickie doesn't have to mean cumming. If he is bothered, he should try seeing someone and you be there to support him.

If the orgasm is that big a deal for you and not for him, then that is an issue you have to get over mentally. If you are having trouble with sex because he can't orgasm and his orgasm get's you off, then that is a kind of incompatibility and you need to decide what is more important to you. Orgasming can be a mental block, it could be a health thing... he has low testosterone so that might be the factor and if he is worried by it, he can see his doctor. Or he might just not be an orgasmic person. If he is getting hard, you are already over the main hurdle.

quote:

Or, tips for not being sore, and jaw exercises. Or if you think he's gay &/or I should just leave, that's fine too. Or, is it me? Am I like thinking about it in the wrong way or like am I not being submissive? Any responses are appreciated.


Gay? Really? I'm sorry but that is one of the dumbest things I have heard - I'm sorry that sounds harsh - but really. If you think he is gay, then ask him. Hes the only one that can answer that, lack of orgasm doesn't mean a person is gay in the same way as a man wearing eyeliner doesn't means he is.

No I don't think you are being 'not submissive'... but I do think you are being a immature about it and not really empathetic. If it isn't bothering him, then let him deal with it. If this is bothering you, then you do need to rethink your relationship and tell him just how much it is bothering you.

*frickin'spelling




SomoneReal -> RE: male orgasm (1/28/2011 12:21:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hipsterkittyxo

So, I'm not really sure if this goes here, but I identify as submissive and want responses from like-minded individuals. Basically, my owner really struggles with achieving orgasm.

Like, it's not a new problem, I've known about it since the beginning and he doesn't seem to be too worried about it. Naturally, I get sore and tired after awhile and I don't complain or anything, and I don't begrudge it, I just can't really enjoy any sexy things we do because I feel like it's pointless because he doesn't get off half of the time, and the other half of the time, we have sex and then he can't orgasm from sex and I just give him oral. He's said himself that he wishes he could just like fill me with cum and la la la, but I don't think he knows what to do either.

As far as like our dynamic, maybe I shouldn't be worried about this and I should just leave it all up to him, but I like legit care, if not like for our relationship, but for any future ones he has, because if it's something that could be fixed, by any means, I want it to be fixed.

He doesn't really exercise ever, and he thinks the whole problem is due to his poor health, like he doesn't work and eats a lot of pizza. He's not grossly overweight, he's just like kind of chubby, so I don't really understand it, because I've dated much unhealthier people who like couldn't last more than a couple minutes. When we first started dating, he said it was because he had to get used to me/he had been single for years and was used to jerking off, and like he was used to jerking off like 5 times a day to porn since he stopped working, and that it had also been like a problem his whole life. I thought it was like porn addiction whatever, but we more/less live together and he stopped masturbating completely for awhile, and nothing really improved. He's also really low on testosterone. He's also about 27, if that matters. Maybe he's gay or it's a prostate thing? He had a vasectomy when he was like in his very early twenties. I really just don't know. I'm just like at a loss and it's creating a lot of anxiety, because I don't want to give 1.5 hour long blow jobs several times a day for the rest of my life, despite how orally fixated I may be and all of the instant gratification. I know that I don't really have a choice if I want to be with him, and it's not really my decision what we do anyway, and I gladly would do it, but I think I'm just burnt out. Furthermore, there's like no real spontaneity to sex, like if I want to fuck 10 minutes before I have class or I want to like fool around somewhere, it can't be like a quick thing, like we both know it takes forever.

We talk about everything and I'm not like shy about talking about stuff, so I don't need to know how to do that, I just want to know if anyone has any ideas or if anyone has had any similar experiences. Or, tips for not being sore, and jaw exercises. Or if you think he's gay &/or I should just leave, that's fine too. Or, is it me? Am I like thinking about it in the wrong way or like am I not being submissive? Any responses are appreciated.



The nutrition could be a part of it, but that would more affect his sex drive overall.  I would go to Vitamin World, or your local Vitamin Store, and buy something called "Maca Root".  If he takes 2 of those every morning for a few days, than things should be OK




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