RE: D/s is about unfairness

RE: D/s is about unfairness (Full Version)

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[Poll]

D/s is about unfairness

Right as always. You're brilliance makes me so hot, Peon.

29% (7)

Total wank as usual, Peon. When was the last time you went out?

45% (11)

That's not the key thing, but sort of. Let me explain.

25% (6)

Total Votes : 24

(last vote on : 1/30/2011 6:43:45 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )

Message

Aylee -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:30:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer RF has implied that you're not helping in asking this question, whereas quite the opposite is the case, Aylee. I see no reason for him to be upset about it. I was only suggesting that he has a microscopically small penis and couldn't beat up a baby with one arm tied behind its back because he shrank in terror from giving his true feelings on this matter. Well that's not. . . Wait a minute. Why have YOU gotten to see RF's penis and I haven't? You all are just not right. shakes head

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:33:17 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Aylee Wait a minute. Why have YOU gotten to see RF's penis and I haven't? You all are just not right. shakes head You're both rotters, and I hate you :)

SorceressJ -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:36:22 PM)
I got to see RF's tender, juicy squid. WIN [sm=champ.gif]

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:38:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SorceressJ I got to see RF's tender, juicy squid. WIN [sm=champ.gif] Thank you for introducing me to a new experience ... ... that of choking on one's toothbrush, and spraying toothpaste every fucking where :)

Charles6682 -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:41:13 PM)
I don't feel D/S is unfair,as long as it is something that we both consent to.I choose to let a Lady make the rule's.Where it is unfair,is when anyone is forced against their will to do something they do not want to do.There is a difference beween involuntary slavery and consensual slavey.The kind of slavery that the U.S.A. and many other nations had hundreds of years ago is unfair.The D/S type of slavery that is practiced in this lifestyle,is very fair.As long as everyone involved agrees to the terms.

SorceressJ -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 8:41:31 PM)
No no, luv.. it isn't the toothpaste that you're supposed to spray every fucking where.. You see, she's supposed to choke on.. and then you're supposed to.. um, well, YOU figure it out, eh..? [:D]

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/29/2011 11:46:57 PM)
quote: For me, as a hetero sub male, the crucial thing is that a D/s relationship is unfair. It is wrong that some woman has superiority over me, gets to give me orders, control me, punish me for infractions . . . and so on. And this is why I like it. This is what gives me the buzz. I love all the contradictions that it implies, no matter how much they bust logic apart. You know I agree with you wholeheartedly on this sentiment, except that it is wrong sentiment. I find that until one is thoroughly reconciled with, this is what this woman is like, and this is what I respond to as a man, there will be some resistance (within or without), and possibly block relationships from happening. I'm not saying, you haven't integrated the desire, with the normalcy in your life/mind, since I don't know. I do know, that when the thought, and core belief in it's normalcy aren't married, there is a lot of pushing/pulling within a relationship. Besides, what does logic have to do with love? Sure, society may say, you should want person A, biology says, phuck that, find person B for me please, culture may say You should have A, and C, for your male lusts. I pity the person who tries to make sense of lust and love. M

DesFIP -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 3:03:47 AM)
I'm waiting for Peon and RF to kiss and make up. They're both on my list of favorite posters and them being upset with each other makes me sad. Oh and SJ isn't that special, we all got to see RF's squid! So there! Although I'm wondering why anyone would brush their teeth in front of the computer instead of going to the bathroom to do so.

sexyred1 -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 3:20:22 AM)
Aside from Peon and RF flirting and not completely knowing whether this thread is serious or just random stupidity, I saw the title of the thread and thought, yes, that is pretty true about my current situation. But I recognize that there is both a positive and a negative unfairness aspects. However...I recognize that my particular situation is unfair because of the relationship behavior of the person I am speaking of, not that D/s in itself is unfair. What I mean to say, since I just woke up for an annoying reason, is that while I enjoy the positive and inherent "unfairness" in the D/s arena (which is the point, really), I do not enjoy the negative unfair behavior of the other person because they give me what I want in strictly BDSM ways but they do not give me what I need in other important ways. I am sure none of that made sense but perhaps that is because I just saw said person last night and I am still too annoyed that I had such a hot time, but he is such a jerk. But of course no one is twisting my arm to engage in this, so I cannot really complain can I?

TotalDiscipline -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 3:25:17 AM)
at OP how can it be unfair when you accept it?

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 4:25:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue quote: ORIGINAL: windchymes Oooh, guy-on-guy mutual rumination, HAWWWWWT! [:D] I'm not even fully decided on what that means and I'm still outraged :) I think windchymes wants to see you and I eating grass together, RF. Well, it takes all sorts. :-)

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 4:33:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP I'm waiting for Peon and RF to kiss and make up. They're both on my list of favorite posters and them being upset with each other makes me sad. Awwww . . . it's not like that, Des!

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 4:54:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline how can it be unfair when you accept it? TD, People accept all sorts of things despite their being unfair, don't they? Unfair prices, unfair wages, etc, etc, etc . . . But the unfairness I'm talking about, in D/s, I not only accept, I love. Mind you, as Sexyred points out, it's a specific kind of unfairness. Of course there's the kind that's do with one partner or the other being a git. And, worse, there's that kind of unfairness that isn't borne of mutual consent, as Charles says. When Charles says 'the D/S type of slavery that is practiced in this lifestyle is very fair' I think he's absolutely right. When two people, as partners, deliberately set out to be unfair with one another, I think they're likely to develop a very keen idea of what's 'good-type-unfair' and what's 'bad-type-unfair'. For me, this view of unfairness of mine works fine for me. A benefit of it is that I don't need to rationalise a partner as 'better' than me in any way. She won't need to be cleverer or stronger. She certainly won't need to be a 'Goddess'. I may well indulge all such feelings at one time or another in a relationship, but I don't need reason them out, to 'fix' them with some sort of logic. But at bottom, the idea of unfairness works for me because I don't have anything I need to resolve. I don't need somehow rationally to convert 'wrong' into 'right'. I just accept it as a 'good wrongness'.

LadyPact -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:03:10 AM)
I didn't answer the poll, because I'm not especially thrilled with the term "unfair". I think My opinion on the matter might be slightly affected. I just came from a thread which was your basic concept. 'Dom is doing X. I don't like X. What to do?' I'm sitting on My side of the screen, thinking the following. 'You are the submissive, right? Dom made the decision. It's your job to submit.' Whether that's fair or not doesn't come into it for Me. I've never been one to think that submission is only about what a person likes or wants to do. The greater areas for growth in submission are those times when it's not.

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:17:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact I didn't answer the poll, because I'm not especially thrilled with the term "unfair". I think My opinion on the matter might be slightly affected. I just came from a thread which was your basic concept. 'Dom is doing X. I don't like X. What to do?' I'm sitting on My side of the screen, thinking the following. 'You are the submissive, right? Dom made the decision. It's your job to submit.' Whether that's fair or not doesn't come into it for Me. I've never been one to think that submission is only about what a person likes or wants to do. The greater areas for growth in submission are those times when it's not. See, for me, accepting the idea of unfairness leads to the opposite result. It would go like this for me, "'You are the submissive, right? You bought into this unfairness, so you have to submit to it.' I expect much of such submission won't be fun, but it will be crucial, nonetheless. Without the rules of the game, you have no game. Just as true of D/s as it is of chess or football.

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:27:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DesFIP I'm waiting for Peon and RF to kiss and make up. They're both on my list of favorite posters and them being upset with each other makes me sad. Eh? I'm not upset with him in the slightest. It was humour. At least, it was for me - I wouldn't presume to speak for the Boy Wonder ;)

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:29:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer I think windchymes wants to see you and I eating grass together, RF. <Meatloaf Mode> "I would do anything for love ... but I won't chew grass!"

LadyPact -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:33:01 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer See, for me, accepting the idea of unfairness leads to the opposite result. It would go like this for me, "'You are the submissive, right? You bought into this unfairness, so you have to submit to it.' I expect much of such submission won't be fun, but it will be crucial, nonetheless. Without the rules of the game, you have no game. Just as true of D/s as it is of chess or football. LOL. I just started a thread saying the very same thing. It's not just the rules of the game. It also includes something else. You signed up to play. If you say you're playing football, you don't sit in the middle of the field and knit.

PeonForHer -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:34:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue At least, it was for me - I wouldn't presume to speak for the Boy Wonder ;) Less of the 'Boy', matey. I know I'll never be able to grow chest-hair, but I do have some fine wrinkles. ;-)

RapierFugue -> RE: D/s is about unfairness (1/30/2011 5:43:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PeonForHer quote: ORIGINAL: RapierFugue At least, it was for me - I wouldn't presume to speak for the Boy Wonder ;) Less of the 'Boy', matey. I know I'll never be able to grow chest-hair, but I do have some fine wrinkles. ;-) You're old and fit? I'm going to cry :(

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