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lizi -> RE: Why is it so hard to find more than just kinky sex?? (1/30/2011 6:17:40 AM)
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Stud2u, all we know is what's in front of us. You are online, we don't know you, and there are very few pieces of information available to your audience. Lets look at this information.
Your username is a sexual reference.
Your picture is of a nude chest.
Your very short profile is all sex and kink.
I look for relationships, not play, not hooking up, not casual anything. If I was looking and you wrote me an email I'd look at your name and probably be ready to toss the email out as I'd feel we were not compatible...your picture is of your nude upper body - people interested in relationships don't generally get naked. If I chose to look at your profile, my immediate summarization from seeing the pic and the name would have been verified. At that point I'd probably send you a 'no thank you' reply and go on my way. There is a short entry in your journal section way at the bottom about relationships and your interest in them. That's it, that's all you have out there in the way of announcing that you would like a deeper connection.
If you are interested in building something of a partnership and not quick kinky sex then why the heck aren't you marketing yourself that way? Other people can't read your mind, all we know is what you portray of yourself. You're 43, this isn't rocket science, if you walked into a cocktail party without a shirt, announced that your name was something sexual, and proceeded to give a list of the kinky things you like to do as opposed to the fact that you like playing cards and riding bikes - who do you think would come over to talk to you? The woman in the corner looking for a soulmate or the woman who wants some action tonight?
You are not alone in what you desire. There are many many people here that are looking for a connection of the mind, not just of the body. I'd be remiss if I didnt say that the majority of women are looking for both, women seem to generally want a relationship. You seem to be an attractive guy, you seem to be articulate. Show yourself in your profile to be an interesting guy who is looking for a longer term partner and you should do well. Keep up your pic if you want but don't make it your primary. Change your name. Add some information to your profile about what you like to do outside of sex/kink, also put in something that says about what you are looking for and that you want a deeper connection.
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