Ultimate submission desire

Ultimate submission desire (Full Version)

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toylet -> Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 9:50:51 AM)
For the past couple of years, I have had this thought about selfless servitude and whether, when provided -- and expected -- in a BDSM context, there are limits. PLEASE DO NOT READ BEYOND THIS POINT UNLESS YOU ARE NON-JUDGEMENTAL AND NOT OFFENDED OR NAUSEATED BY EXTREME BEHAVIOR. To be specific, what has haunted me is this fantasy: the Mistress is so sick that she has taken to bed. For her fever, I have been stroking her body with cool compresses, keeping her water glass freshly filled and generally staying by her side so that I can comfort and immediately respond to her every need. She is a rather demanding Mistress and has a wickedly sadistic streak, but her illness has subdued her markedly. She revels in controlling me (which I very much enjoy -- being responsive to a powerful woman in nirvana to me); having stomach flu, however, has greatly diminished much of dominant energy. She just wants and needs to be taken care of. One of the manifestations of her flu has been terrible diarrhea, causing her to stumble out of bed to the bathroom, supported by me. After she defecates, I wipe her and help her back to bed. As I help her back into bed and straighten the covers, she stares hard at me and tells me that getting in and out of bed is too much for her. Then, with a bit of sparkle in her eyes and the start of a smirk on her lips, she asks what can I propose. Both of us know what she is thinking about -- me being her human bedpan. This is not some meaningless remark made by her in feverish delerium. It is a challenge posed to me to show that there isn't anything I wouldn't do for her. It is also a huge leap for me to take. While I have drunk her urine often and we have played from time to time with scat, including even my token ingestion of her feces on occasion, this is way different. I feel compelled to respond with the suggestion that, the next time she feels the need to get to the toilet, she use my mouth instead so that she won't have to get out of bed and I'll do my best to swallow all of it. As I make that offer, a number of thoughts run through my head. Will I get sick from doing it? Will I actually be able to perform or chicken out (which will really infuriate her -- with subsequent consequences) due to fear? Am I insane for even suggesting myself as an alternative to the bathroom? And, finally, is this a need of hers? If so, is her motivation one of getting a sadistic rush to offset how poorly she feels? Or, is it a test and, if so, does she just want to hear me make that offer or is it for her to be certain that I truly will do anything for her? I am interested in the thoughts of both Mistresses and submissves/slaves about this issue. Is it a beautiful demonstration of ultimate service? Is it an over-the-top exercise of vicious sadism? Thank you.

LadyNTrainer -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 9:57:53 AM)
Realistically, a bedpan is going to work better and isn't going to put her at risk of making an utter mess of the bed and having to deal with your powerful reactions, sexual, emotional, turn-on, revulsion, vomiting, etc, while she is sick. What makes you think she will want to play with you or deal with those things when she is feeling that ill? In your fantasy, everything will go perfectly of course....but the cold hard fact is that this is your fantasy, and it's not actually about her at all. If you ingest the ejecta of someone who is seriously ill, it is a very direct vector of both viruses and bacteria and you are almost certainly going to fall ill yourself. At this point she's going to have to care for you, and you won't be able to care for her. Bottom line, this is a great kinky fantasy that you could play out with a consenting partner, but in reality it has jack and shit to do with serving another person. It's kinky fun for you, and if you find a partner who thinks it's fun too, then you could play with it. But no, it's not any level of service at all, let alone "ultimate" service. The person you are primarily serving here is yourself. Be honest about that; it works better.

PeonForHer -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 10:25:31 AM)
As an experienced femdom once said here, 'fantasies never smell'. Me, I can be absolutely entranced by a woman sitting opposite me, say, on a train. But the instant I smell a really nasty fart, the feeling evaporates. That's even if the train's crowded and common sense says that any one of the other passengers could be responsible for the crime. Certain fantasies can shatter very easily when dragged into the real world, is what I'm saying.

PeonForHer -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 10:26:40 AM)
Oh and as a by-the-way - I like your icon. That'd work well as a tee shirt design.

MissAsylum -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 7:15:53 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: toylet I am interested in the thoughts of both Mistresses and submissves/slaves about this issue. Is it a beautiful demonstration of ultimate service? Is it an over-the-top exercise of vicious sadism? As LadyNTrainer has said- this is a fantasy. Seriously, if a person is that sick, what really makes you think that they would be up for this? Please take your hand out of your pants.

LPslittleclip -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 8:00:55 PM)
the part of caring for her while she is ill is fine but the ingestion of feces from someone that is ill will make you sick and then both will be ill and need assistance. scat play from someone that is well can cause problems as the transfer of micro-organisms can cause illness. if you wish to be used as a human toilet do so with someone in a healthy state to reduce the risk of illness.

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 8:03:00 PM)
quote: In your fantasy, everything will go perfectly of course....but the cold hard fact is that this is your fantasy, and it's not actually about her at all. If you ingest the ejecta of someone who is seriously ill, it is a very direct vector of both viruses and bacteria and you are almost certainly going to fall ill yourself. At this point she's going to have to care for you, and you won't be able to care for her. Bottom line, this is a great kinky fantasy that you could play out with a consenting partner, but in reality it has jack and shit to do with serving another person. It's kinky fun for you, and if you find a partner who thinks it's fun too, then you could play with it. But no, it's not any level of service at all, let alone "ultimate" service. My favorite part of the reply, since I wasn't going to touch this at all, am glad she said it. M

Tantriqu -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 8:28:48 PM)
Now THIS is hot! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSur9Nz5C-A&feature=related

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 8:40:27 PM)
[sm=biggrin.gif]Spilled water on keyboard alert to viewers of above, LOLOL. M

hausboy -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 8:50:57 PM)
Hi Toylet-- I believe the bottom line here (sorry, no pun intended) is your last sentence: maybe I'm mis-reading it, but it seems likes you have shared with us your very taboo fantasy, and you are asking: "is this okay? is it sick? is it over the top? is it okay for me to have this fantasy?" I didn't get the impression that you were asking if it was a feasible, realistic or safe scene--your CAPS introductory led me to believe you are asking the dear readers of CollarMe to not judge or criticize you (which I'm not....) but instead, you are just looking for some positive affirmation. An affirmation that says "no. you are not sick to have fantasies. you can have whatever fantasies you like. fantasies are perfectly safe and it doesn't make you sick or disgusting, even if most of society finds a particular fantasy to be labeled as such." You didn't ask about the logistical aspects of the fantasy, or the reality of such as scenario.... you asked about the fantasy. It seems like we get lots and lots of posters here who ask for some sort of confirmation from the board at large, that their fantasies and desires are not sick. it's certainly not my fantasy....but that's really irrelevant. It's YOUR fantasy. So in your mind--the place where this fantasy happily lives--go right ahead and allow it to be a beautiful act of the ultimate submission, because I'm guessing that's the positive affirmation that your mind needs to hear in order to allow yourself to have such a fantasy without feeling true shame or guilt. Dream (and wank) away!

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 9:02:18 PM)
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mummyman321 -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 9:35:43 PM)
I really hate when the sharts occur (shit farts)!

SexyBossyBBW -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/4/2011 10:11:25 PM)
LOLOL Mummy, you've got to stop going there, if she has a weak sphincter. M

thishereboi -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/5/2011 5:29:44 AM)
quote: am interested in the thoughts of both Mistresses and submissves/slaves about this issue. Is it a beautiful demonstration of ultimate service? Is it an over-the-top exercise of vicious sadism? If I were that sick and all you could think about was how to turn it into a scat scene for you, you would be out the door. You want to show her ultimate service. Try taking care of her and saving your fantasy until she is feeling better.

LadyNTrainer -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/5/2011 7:43:21 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thishereboi If I were that sick and all you could think about was how to turn it into a scat scene for you, you would be out the door. You want to show her ultimate service. Try taking care of her and saving your fantasy until she is feeling better. Nail. Head. Hammer. Hit.

LadyPact -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/5/2011 9:37:23 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hausboy I didn't get the impression that you were asking if it was a feasible, realistic or safe scene--your CAPS introductory led me to believe you are asking the dear readers of CollarMe to not judge or criticize you (which I'm not....) but instead, you are just looking for some positive affirmation. At the same time, we also get a lot of folks that want to live out their fantasies. We get folks who put their fantasies up just to more or less inflict them on other folks. We get folks that have fantasies that don't have the first clue of what could happen if their fantasy became a reality. Let's say I did this. For the sake of argument, every once in a while, I created a post to describe variations of My fantasy to drop an anvil on a sub's head. In doing so, I come up with different themes about this. Maybe I go for brain splatter in some scenarios and others are more about how hot I think it will sound to hear the impact on the skull. Don't you think at some point, somebody would tell Me that this just might be dangerous?

sexyred1 -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/5/2011 9:40:21 AM)
There is a long story about this fantasy (but taken to the nth degree) in Creative Writing. The OP should read it and then it might not be such a vivid fantasy for him.

ElanSubdued -> RE: Ultimate submission desire (2/5/2011 11:24:35 AM)
Regarding LadyNTrainer's post... +1 Thishereboi also strikes a cord. There's quite a difference between service and fantasy. Anyone I've ever looked after who is as sick as described in the OP isn't winking and looking for ways to kink out. Ditto for the caregiver. The scene isn't my thing to begin with, but as a play scene it works. As a measure of "service" though, it's bullocks.

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