ItsAProcess
Posts: 62
Joined: 3/29/2006
Status: offline
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Califchick: You seem to be torn between the two urges to be sharp-tongued and criticizing and giving actual, genuine advice. I appreciate most of the sentiment but the nitpickery and veiled suspicions/accusations at the depth of our Dynamic I do NOT appreciate.
For MaamJay: Your post is shows lots of experience, I've read it a couple times, now, and am sure that Evelyn has done so as well. But it is the last paragraph that I found to be most insightful, specifically in regards to being the Leader whilst also being New. I was having some difficulty explaining this, but you've taken the 'brainspeak' and given it actual language and meaning.
Thank you.
For agirl From what I saw your posts generally came down to: Be flexible, do not expect too much, too soon... as well as being aware that things will be difficult at times. The former I saw nowhere else done nigh as well, I sincerely hope that she will take the moral behind it to heart.
Though I'm not sure what you're basing your 'estimate' off of, so I'm simply going to assume you were jesting and move on.
You have my thanks as well.
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ORIGINAL: LillyBoPeep
the only thing i could really say is that you have to be more mindful and accountable. you may have to change the way you've gotten used to doing something because it better suits his preferences, OR he may not even care HOW you do it, just that it gets done.
Good, general advice. But something that needs to be stated now and again nonetheless, just so it doesn't fade into the back of one's thoughts.
Thank you.
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ORIGINAL: SailingBum
Really it's not any different than moving in with someone who does not enjoi smacking his bitch around sheesh... Dom sub gay straight and everything in between, Same shit different day
BadOne
This is by far the worst information or advice in this thread. Any person who is not apathetic/cynical or narcissistic will tell you that each relationship dynamic is different (ESPECIALLY transitioning from Vanilla to Kinky). Furthermore it can barely be quantified as 'advice'. Being both vague and badly written.
In fact, one might go so far as to say that this is counterproductive, with the potential to be damagingly so, should someone naive take said advice to heart. I wonder what your real motives were, providing such blatant misinformation?
I am absolutely sure that I could literally write a college-standard essay on JUST how incorrect this is.
To any other with a similar question as Evelyn, Ignore this.
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ORIGINAL: subtlebutterfly
One of those rare moments that I agree with SailingBum
preparing emotionally? does that involve sayin hey baby n kiss him? or is there some..preparation to it?
...don't tell me there's a preparataion...gawd damn it no wonder I'm never gonna be on those kind of relationships
This isn't even information, or advice. Just badly constructed sentences meant to demean or belittle.
Ignore this as well.
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ORIGINAL: NuevaVida
He and I are starting to make plans for my move (to him) later this year. That said, we do spend every weekend and occasional week days together, and we're at the point where we're not "on" for each other when together. We are just who we are.
These are things I'm thinking about, about joining his household: .......
This entire post was fantastic, and I thank you for the thought and effort you put forth into it. Your advice is both well posed and sensible. Some of the issues you raised have been considered already, and some have not. But they are all now on Our list to address.
My Thanks, to you.
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ORIGINAL: sexyred1
Hey HisEvelyn,
I am very happy for you, I know how excited you must be.
My best advice to you is not to overthink or overanalyze any of it.
Living with someone full time takes a lot of getting used to, whether vanilla or not and if you are LD it is even stranger I would imagine, never having been in a LDR.
The only thing I would say is to be yourselves, give each other patience, space and both of you need compromise and flexibility to become part of your vocabularies.
Oh, and don't have overly high expectations of the kink thing. When you get together once in a while, everything is so hot when you see each other. When you are living together, things are not always perfectly hot since instead of having a date, you are living your lives together, and that is not always fun and games.
Enjoy.
sexyred1, once again you give good advice with a tone that shows both experience and an open minded desire to help. I'm not a frequent poster on this board, but I do tend to watch what she posts. Your name has come up a fair few times and always in a complimentary fashion. I am sincerely hopeful that this will continue to be the case.
< Message edited by ItsAProcess -- 2/7/2011 7:14:33 PM >
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RE: Transitioning - 
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