Having your limits broken (Full Version)

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PurpleCoconut -> Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 4:22:18 AM)

Hey,

I can't remember where I read this story, but I would love some thoughts on it? Or, has anything similar happened to you, and how did you feel after?

Before a slave had met his mistress for the first time, he had said that he didn't want to suck cock!  A while into their relationship, the Mistress and slave went to a party together, a BDSM party.  A little while into the party, the slave was restrained without warning, and chained (to the radiator, if I remember correctly).  The Mistress announced that anyone was welcome to whip and flog the slave, and the slave particularly liked sucking cock.  By the end of the night, the slave had been whipped and flogged quite a bit, but had also been forced to suck 2 cocks, and had cum all over their face.

What are your thoughts about a slaves limits being broken like that?  I'm new to this so I'm not really sure if this is the norm, or not

Any input much appreciated :)



DarkSteven -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 4:48:19 AM)

Okay.  Since your profile states you're female and your situation involves a man, I will assume this never happened to you.

Generally, the sort of scenario you describe would result in the Mistress being dumped and likely having her name blackened at any local groups.  It likely would not come to this, but the nonconsensuality could conceivably create justification for assault charges,

There are two kinds of limits:  soft (could be broken but would require consistent, gentle prodding to get there) and hard (nohow, no possibility, no way).  If cocksucking was a hard limit, then just breaking it would be wrong.  if it was a soft limit, then breaking it this abruptly would be wrong.

The only way that this could be acceptable is if the relationship had evolved to TPE, in which case the slave would have no rights at all.  (The use of the term "slave" implies that but all relationships are different.) 

The restarining without warning,
The flogging/whipping by other than the Mistress, and the
cocksucking

are three separate elements.  You've described the sucking situation, but the other elements were also nonconsensual and should have been agreed upon in advance.

To be honest about it, it sounds more like someone's hot fantasy than something a sane person would try.  I don't know any Dom/mes that would do a scene nonconsensually that could destroy a relationship and a reputation.







KeepMeUnderneath -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:00:41 AM)

If that happend to me.  1 man would have the others dick broken off inside his asshole and vice versa.  They are limits for a reason and they should be respected.  I can understand the whole fantasy of being 'forced' (Not to suck man stick tho.  That's, yuck.) , but any sexual act that is forced upon another person is rape.  If you are going to get raped, you protect yourself.  If your Mistress is blurring the boundaries between kinky fun and rape, then, step up and show her how pathetic a mistress she is.  After all, if you step up and protect yourself in that situation, she can't control you.  If she can't control you, she isn't doing what she's all about.

At the end of the day, we can all run around playing slave and master and mistress and sub and domme and sissy and all that, but we are all people.  We all have rights.  I'm new to all of this, but, I would say the lines have to be drawn at the point where it stops being fun. To me, that's the most important bit.  It shouldn't leave emotional scars that will turn you into a psychpath.



TotalDiscipline -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:03:41 AM)

atOP

having your limits broken isn't always so romantic as you seem to see your example.
Besides ..there is a reason why they are called "limits"



sirsholly -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:08:56 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline

having your limits broken isn't always so romantic as you seem to see your example.
Besides ..there is a reason why they are called "limits"
for me there would be no romance at all. There would be a lot of "You MOTHERF**KER!!" followed by one very serious "GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!!"



RapierFugue -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:12:06 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly
for me there would be no romance at all. There would be a lot of "You MOTHERF**KER!!" followed by one very serious "GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!!"


"BUT FIRST, GET ME OFF THIS FUCKING RADIATOR!"


;)



DarkSteven -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:15:04 AM)

Another reason I think this story is bogus - I know of no gags that would permit sucking but would not allow protesting.  And everyone present would see massive struggling against the restraints and would know that something was wrong. As KMU states, this is a rape scenario, and there were not even provisions to ensure that STDs were not transmitted.

Resistance play (struggling) DOES occur at play parties, but for obvious reasons, all bystanders are told about it ahead of time.  This story is an excellent example of why SSC (safe, sane, consensual) is a basis for almost all scenes.

PurpleCoconut, you're new to the scene.  Don't let fictional stories about crazies keep you from exploring.  We're all just normal people for the most part.



RapierFugue -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:17:47 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
This story is an excellent example of why SSC (safe, sane, consensual) is a basis for almost all scenes.


I was wondering who would be the first to fly the SSC flag.



TotalDiscipline -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:18:00 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

quote:

ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline

having your limits broken isn't always so romantic as you seem to see your example.
Besides ..there is a reason why they are called "limits"
for me there would be no romance at all. There would be a lot of "You MOTHERF**KER!!" followed by one very serious "GET THE FUCK OUT NOW!!"




I tried to say the same as you..but more behaved.
(I have a problem asnwering decently with such topic..lol)



sirsholly -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:20:13 AM)

quote:

We're all just normal people for the most part.
*blinkblink*

Steven...you been snortin' that cookie dust again?



myotherself -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:22:23 AM)

I think in terms of mathematics:

unwanted cock in my mouth + teeth = lots of blood and a trip to the emergency room

Seriously, I will echo what was said above - if this story is even half true (and I have my doubts, if I'm being honest) then it's assault and rape.

But in the decade or so that I've been doing WIITWD, I've never heard anything like this, ever. I've been to play parties, but any sign of non-consent and there's always a number of people happy to jump in and say stop. Hell, I've even done it myself on one occasion!





TotalDiscipline -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:23:25 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself

unwanted cock in my mouth + teeth = lots of blood and a trip to the emergency room





that..I just felt... [:(]



gungadin09 -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:24:23 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PurpleCoconut
What are your thoughts about a slaves limits being broken like that?  I'm new to this so I'm not really sure if this is the norm, or not


Boy, you sound as clueless as i did a year ago.

First of all- welcome to the forums.
Second, i'm going to give you some unsolicited advice. You are free to listen, or not.

1. You need to educate yourself a little better, otherwise you're headed for a disaster. Hang out on the forums. Read a how-to books on BDSM. Go to a local event. Talk to people (in public). This stuff can be fun, but it can also be dangerous, okay? You wouldn't just strap on an oxygen pack and go deep sea diving, right? You wouldn't go mountain climbing without first learning how. It's the same here. Don't get all silly and excited and jump in head first without knowing how deep the water is. Be wise about this. Never forget that your safety is the most important thing. It is also your own responsibility.

2. If i were you, before i started to play (online or off) i would decide on exactly what my limits were, and then be prepared to stick to them. Decide what your hard limits are (what you absolutely won't do), decide what your soft limits are (what you might be willing to do) and decide what you want to do. You need to be quite clear on what you can and can't live with before you start. Also, as far as i am concerned, hard limits are inviolable, and anyone who deliberately breaks them has broken my trust permanently.

3. Be careful about who you talk to, exchange pictures with, cam with, etc. A lot of guys see this site as free porn.

4. If you're meeting Someone you don't know, get their name, address, phone number, driver's license, birthdate, etc. and the exact location where you will be. Then arrange for a friend to call you at a certain time to make sure you're alright. Arrange to meet in a public place first.

5. There is a lot of risk involved in what we do. Some of it can't be avoided. But you want to minimize it as much as possible. Don't ditch your common sense. Don't ignore your gut if you're getting a bad feeling. Don't be afraid to say stop or slow down. And expect whoever you're playing with to respect your limits.

Good luck!

pam



myotherself -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:25:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline



that..I just felt... [:(]



*smirks*



agirl -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:26:53 AM)

Firstly, having a total NO-GO limit isn't the same as *not wanting to* and you've used both those terms so I'm not certain which it is.

There are lots of things I don't want to do but during the course of our relationship I've done them. I do things that I don't want to do all the time. Things I don't want to do aren't limits, they're just things I don't want to do.

There's a big difference between doing something that you're aware the other person doesn't like, or doesn't want to do, knowing that it's NOT going cause massive fallout, upset or harmful resentment.........and quite another to take a gamble on someone's feelings, trust AND any relationship there is. Most people tend to want to gain trust, not destroy it.

You can only judge this kind of thing in context. That type of thing might very well not bother me greatly in MY relationship but in someone else's it might be horribly crucifying.

We do have to take some responsibility for who we are in relationships with and the situations we place ourselves in. There are plenty of people that go headlong into situations without having spent the time to get to know what they're getting into and also ignoring little warning signs for the same reason.

agirl














soul2share -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:33:41 AM)

I was involved with a man who decided that he was going to use one of my hard limits as punishment for some insignificant stupid thing that he thought I meant while IM'ing on line.  He never got the chance.....I told him in no uncertain terms that I was done with him, and why.  What amazed me is that he couldn't see how he'd violated my trust.  If he can't respect my limits, then he can't respect me.  I don't have many hard limits, and they are the most extreme ones anyway.  his excuse?....he was fucking with my mind.....BULL!

In light of the post, yeah, that little scenario has all the earmarks of someone's fantasy.  I have never been in a position like that, but if there was any doubt in my mind that the slave wasn't totally with the program, then I'd do something to stop it.  Fortunately, I can honestly say that the people I do know would see the struggling and resisting for what it truly was and called a halt to the scene until it was perfectly clear that this was SSC.  Because, if it ever happened to me, someone would be calling 911 for a bitten off dick!  And I'd make sure they wouldn't be able to reattach that sucker!




soul2share -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:38:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TotalDiscipline
quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself
unwanted cock in my mouth + teeth = lots of blood and a trip to the emergency room

that..I just felt... [:(]


And have you ever SEEN a bunny's teeth?????  Two on top, two on the bottom, right in front, and about 1/2 inch long!!!!!  And they come together like a cigar cutter!  [image]http://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/innocentsmily.gif[/image]

Yeah, I felt it too!  [image]http://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/teehee.gif[/image]



RapierFugue -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:41:14 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: soul2share

Yeah, I felt it too!  [image]http://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/teehee.gif[/image]


Love that smiley! :)



TotalDiscipline -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:43:36 AM)

the bunny teeth story was ..mm....scary
[image]http://www.warehouse23.com/img/full/TYVMP008.jpg[/image]



myotherself -> RE: Having your limits broken (2/12/2011 5:49:45 AM)

omg - I SO want that piccie for my avatar at some point! [:D]



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