RE: Apology Equals Weakness?

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RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/15/2011 6:19:37 PM

Nanako

Posts: 222
Joined: 2/7/2011
From: Glasgow, Scotland
Status: offline

Hello miss.
I consider it this way. Throwing D/s to the side for a moment, being unable to apologise would make me think less of someone, as a person.

Nobody is perfect, and the dominants who pretend to be, regardless of gender, are just a walking comedy show ^_^

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 21

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/15/2011 6:27:09 PM

SorceressJ

Posts: 2968
Joined: 7/24/2010
Status: offline

Apologising when mistaken, doing one's own housework, caring for the tired, ill and infirm, offering a helping hand or perspective to others - all actions duly rendered by the evolved individual with love and understanding in his or her heart, having nothing whatsoever to do with BDSM or D/s at all.

SJ

_____________________________

‎Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc. <93>)O(

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 22

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/16/2011 12:56:33 AM

Sundowner

Posts: 2549
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: VaguelyCurious

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

If and when I ever made a mistake, I will apologize for it.

I'm afraid you are wrong, Mr Sundowner. 'If and when I ever made a mistake I would apologise for it' would be consistent. 'If I made 'a' I will 'b'' is inconsistent.

Ah. I may be wrong. Or, I might be wrong. (I'm not as good at this as you).

My suggestion (that he hadn't got round to it yet) was based on the premise that DS was saying:-

If I ever made a mistake (that is if, inadvertently, I have made a mistake which you have now discovered) then of course without question I will apologise, I'm that sort of chap.

I was not thinking conditional if (which, were it to appear would undoubtedly deserve the subjunctive) so much as unrealised if.

(in reply to VaguelyCurious)

Post #: 23

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/16/2011 6:19:44 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistressko

Mileage may vary?

Purely MMV ... IMO ...

But kudo's to You ... for being up front! You ruled one out by being yourself!

Nice trait!

(in reply to mistressko)

Post #: 24

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/17/2011 2:09:01 PM

mistressko

Posts: 63
Joined: 1/31/2011
Status: offline

;-) That is, after all, the point of screening isn't it? :-P

Or in my motto for this year - Take me as I am. . .or get lost!

-MistressK

(in reply to seekingOwnertoo)

Post #: 25

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/17/2011 7:55:12 PM

seekingOwnertoo

Posts: 1323
Joined: 8/1/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistressko

;-) That is, after all, the point of screening isn't it? :-P

Or in my motto for this year - Take me as I am. . .or get lost!

-MistressK

Indeed, it is the point of screening.

Very good luck on your search!

And yes, it can be trying .....

(in reply to mistressko)

Post #: 26

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/18/2011 1:45:12 PM

golemx

Posts: 29
Joined: 1/7/2011
Status: offline

You need to apologize for apologizing!

That is something I have struggled with. It can "feel" wrong to apologize to a sub. Primarily because I expect so much from myself to make no mistakes.

But once it's done, it is done. And I can move on without thinking about it.

The difference between a Dom/me and a sub is that when I make a mistake I can apologize, correct the situation if necessary, shrug, and move on. When a sub makes a mistake they are required to apologize, be punished by me, be forgiven by me, and move on. Very different dynamic.

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 27

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/18/2011 1:46:54 PM

ArizonaBossMan

Posts: 380
Joined: 2/9/2011
Status: offline

Just as long as it isn't the president of the usa apologizing to every tin horn dictator in the world.

(in reply to golemx)

Post #: 28

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/18/2011 1:49:27 PM

Lockit

Posts: 11292
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

I would rather a submissive apologize sincerely and from the heart and mind knowing they were wrong than because I enforce it. I won't enforce it. It says a lot about them if they don't apologize... the same as it would say a lot about me if I didn't.

There is no difference. You are a human being that did something that needs an apology. You either give it, don't, expect it or don't... that says what type of human being you are.

_____________________________

No matter how old a woman gets, some men will think she was born yesterday! ROFL... I love this place!

(in reply to golemx)

Post #: 29

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 2/18/2011 1:50:30 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

I am a dominant. I would like to apologize to all the female slaves.

Now, blow me.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to Lockit)

Post #: 30

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 9/5/2011 4:18:42 AM

mons

Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline

hello everyone
I am asnwering this so late but it is a good post! I come to see that as a dominant woman when I say I am sorry for a mistake , many see it as a weakness I see it as being polite! It is not a weakness it is a strenght to show you can be wrong! For the one whom see this as a weakness I left that person at the door and did not open again for a conversations again!

mons

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 31

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 9/5/2011 5:19:00 AM

Epytropos

Posts: 699
Joined: 7/23/2011
Status: offline

I don't know about you, but I personally am right all the time and make no mistakes, so this is never an issue

_____________________________

They're only words. Don't dwell on them. They never mean what you think.

I speak only of My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 32

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 9/6/2011 4:17:52 AM

mons

Posts: 2400
Joined: 11/16/2005
Status: offline

epytropos

lol yes this is true also but i try to be kind at first
mons

(in reply to Epytropos)

Post #: 33

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 9/6/2011 6:14:33 AM

crazyml

Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LPslittleclip

it takes more strength to admit being wrong. plus it shows that you are a real person

Kerbingo. What LPslittleclip said.

_____________________________

Remember.... There's always somewhere on the planet where it's jackass o'clock.

(in reply to LPslittleclip)

Post #: 34

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 10/31/2011 4:36:34 PM

MistressMeltz

Posts: 124
Joined: 7/8/2007
Status: offline

Apologies show strength and humility. It shows what you are strong enough to say you have made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes!

_____________________________

http://www.clips4sale.com/1043
http://www.images4sale.com/1043
http://www.niteflirt.com/meltznyomouf

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 35

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 11/3/2011 2:03:36 AM

MistrixMsE

Posts: 198
Joined: 1/3/2010
From: Chicago, USA - Touring Internationally
Status: offline

Gasp... and I thank my slaves/subs when they do something nice for me, and sometimes ASK them to do something instead of telling them. I must not be a twue dominant either!
(It doesn't matter that implicit in my asking, is that I still expect they will say yes unless something SERIOUSLY precludes it)

IMHO owning up to your own mistakes/errors shows you are not obsessively duty bound to live up to a fictional image/role, but instead are a real person who has the ability to adapt to normal human interactions.

_____________________________

Sadist with a sense of humor... your predicament amuses me.

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 36

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 11/3/2011 5:55:24 AM

LillyBoPeep

Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline

a lot of people feel like apologizing is weakness -- vanilla, kinky, or otherwise.
it's why so many people are so rude. =p "only the strong survive" etc etc

for me, i wouldn't be interested in someone who couldn't objectively look at behavior and say "i messed up." some aspiring Dominants want to believe that carrying a D-card excuses them from doing this. i disagree.

a Dominant who can own up to his/her own faults is someone i feel like i can believe in even more.
so kudos to you, OP.

_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica

(in reply to MaamJay)

Post #: 37

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 11/3/2011 8:56:51 PM

HannahLynn

Posts: 687
Joined: 10/16/2011
From: where its fucking at.
Status: offline

quote:

Apologies show strength and humility.

i don't know about that really, but it isn't a sign of fucking weakness, its just what should be done. you fuck something up, you apologize.

(in reply to MistressMeltz)

Post #: 38

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 11/3/2011 9:16:41 PM

Hisprettybaby

Posts: 781
Joined: 4/13/2011
From: Bellingham, WA U.S.A.
Status: offline

NECRO THREAD!!!!!!!

That being said, I do not think admitting when I am wrong and apologize makes me weaker. As a matter of fact, I think it takes a stronger person to admit when s/he is wrong and apologize than it does to just lie about it.

(in reply to HannahLynn)

Post #: 39

RE: Apology Equals Weakness? - 11/4/2011 8:38:13 PM

LookieNoNookie

Posts: 12216
Joined: 8/9/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mistressko

I've started the (potentially long) prospect of screening for a houseboy/24/7 TPE. It's something I enjoy, learning about all the different people out there. I did run across something that I wanted to run by you.

In a few cases (very few, but more than one) I would give an 'applicant' (lack of better word) a hard time about an answer. Later I might discover I was wrong, that I misunderstood the answer - for instance terminology, or how something specific worked. I'd go back, even if I'd already dismissed them. I'd say hey, just wanted you to know, when I gave you a hard time about x, I've now learned that is means this and not that. I apologize. It was literally no more than that, exactly as stated.

One of the 'applicants' took it as me being hard on myself. So of course I explained it was only a matter of politeness. I don't run around apologizing lightly. But I feel it's polite sometimes. I percieve it as a strength for a Domme to admit when she is wrong.

Right? Wrong? Mileage may vary?

-MistressK

As a woman, you get 9 katrillion responses to "Hey....hawareya?

It's easy to skip past.

Don't....some are losers.....some aren't.

You'd be surprised.

(That's all I really have to add at this time).

(in reply to mistressko)

Post #: 40

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