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MaitresseEden -> RE: questions about cuckolding in a relationship (10/6/2004 9:52:05 AM)
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I wanted to take some time to think on this topic before posting. So here goes. I disagree a with Goddess Dusty Gold's view of cuckholding. Not that it is practiced that way, it is. I know of several who engage in that form of cuckolding. However it is my belief, * yours may vary* that there are more commonplace and different practices of cuckholding then the one given. First the definition:
cuck·old ( P ) Pronunciation Key (kkld, kk-)
n.
A man married to an unfaithful wife.
tr.v. cuck·old·ed, cuck·old·ing, cuck·olds
To make a cuckold of.
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[Middle English cokewald, from Anglo-Norman *cucuald, from cucu, the cuckoo, from Vulgar Latin *cucclus, from Latin cuclus.]
quote:
Word History: The allusion to the cuckoo on which the word cuckold is based may not be appreciated by those unfamiliar with the nesting habits of certain varieties of this bird. The female of some Old World cuckoos lays its eggs in the nests of other birds, leaving them to be cared for by the resident nesters. This parasitic tendency has given the female bird a figurative reputation for unfaithfulness as well. Hence in Old French we find the word cucuault, composed of cocu, “cuckoo, cuckold,” and the pejorative suffix -ald and used to designate a husband whose wife has wandered afield like the female cuckoo. An earlier assumed form of the Old French word was borrowed into Middle English by way of Anglo-Norman. Middle English cokewold, the ancestor of Modern English cuckold, is first recorded in a work written around 1250.
ok.. now that we got the definition out of the way.. here are my thoughts and response to Goddess Dusty Rose.
quote:
In a true cuckold relationship. the male is subservient to the Dominant Female. Perhaps the couple is married, or perhaps not. The cuckold not only submits to the fact that his cuckoldress will have lovers, he is aroused by the fact that She has other lovers.
In many cases the male is NOT subservient to the female. In Poly relationships, in Dom/Domme relationships, and in open marriages, that are unilateral. By definition any man married to an wife that is not monogamous is cuckolded. Hence I can't embrace this view. Furthermore, for many it has nothing to do with arousal by the thought of her with other lovers, it may be their inability to perform, or a humiliation aspect. My paraplegic friends wife has a lover but is very much in love with her husbans and neither is submissive. But he is unable to satisfy her in the way she needs so they have an "friend" who takes care of things.. A mistress friend of mine who is married to a Vanilla Husband, has a full time submissive lover that she spends 3 nights a week with, In this case it is the Non submissive partner that is cuckholded.
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Often these lovers are referred to as "bulls". Generally speaking, they are not sub males. They are straight Dominant males engaging in sexual acts with the cuck present or aware of the activity. The cuck often is required to prepare the "bull" male as well as his cuckoldress orally. The cucks biggest dream is the cream pie clean-up. This is the oral cleansing of his Lady's vagina or anus, i.e. drinking the "bulls" seed.
Ok. I personally have issues with the whole "bull" mentality, as a Naturally dominant woman it goes against every fiber of my being to be with a "dominant male". I have long felt this is a fantasy ideology put forth by submissive men that woman have felt some sort of obligation to want. Many cucks that I have know use the act of being cuckolded as a means for making thier bisexual desires appear non-consentual so as to eliminate have to face the reality of the acts they are performing. However on the flipside. Many woman enjoy seeing such acts and many truly submissive males who have no desire whatsoever to interact with other males will do so solely to please thier Mistress. Furthermore, Many many cuckolds are never present when their Mistress or Wife is with another male.
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A cuck will also prepare his Lady for an evening out. He must wait patiently for his Lady to arrive home, and then clean or care for Her after Her evening of activity. What I am describing here is the purest form of cuckoldry. So the answer to your question would be NO. The cuckoldress does not engage in sexual activity with another sub. She is enjoying affairs with straight lovers, even though these lovers often are also involved in BDSM as the "bulls" and thus are very aware of the Lady's lifestyle and the fact that she is a Dominant Female in a cuckold relationship. As a final note, the cuck is rarely if ever allowed to penetrate His Lady. he is limited to strict oral servitude.
Again, I disagree, to the whole concept of thier being a "pure" form of anything. A great many of Mistress's have sexual relationships with the person who is being cuckolded, and particular with todays health standards a great many have a say in who and what is done. Furthermore I do not limit my definition of sexual contact to penetration.
Ok.. now that I've responded to Goddess Dusty Rose, here is a bit about my veiws of cuckholding. For me personally it is necessary to have a loving relatonship with my primary submissive, that does not however imply that their will always be monogamy. I have vanilla lovers ( that are by no means "bulls") that I may welcome into my bed from time to time. However only as a guest, and they would never replace my primary. These are generally people that I have a long history with and I would expect my submissive to understand and not feel his place was threatened by this visitor. It may involve me going to visit them, for a long weekend, or such.
I may have more than one submissive, however one would be my primary and I may want to interact with both sexually, or have them interact with each other.
I have friends within the scene who are couples of every combination that one can think of, and at times we may party and play together in manners that involve one or both of us sexually interacting with others. I may or may not but my sub in chasity, often when doing so, it is to tease and torment him until he begs for release or begs to do the unthinkable.
For me personally.. and again.. your views may differ. I can not fathom having a commited relationship to anyone who was incapable of being a lover to me in a full range of positions. How and when those positions and the frequency of them are at my sole discretion, but they will always have the power to withhold consent.
I could go on.. but this is lengthy enough for now.
Ms. Eden
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