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dreamerdreaming -> RE: punishments (2/18/2011 3:54:39 PM)
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Cut his arm off. I have no idea what humiliates him, but that is a horrible punishment. He might be good, after that.
Oh wait- you're not realtime. Nevermind. [8|]
OP, I'm with thishereboi: I'd be extremely humiliated if I had a domme so clueless that she can't even discuss things with me, and instead comes to a bunch of complete strangers asking how to humiliate me. Show the poor guy this thread. That might do it.
Humiliation is a very personal and individual thing, that some people are into and some aren't. If you crave giving it to him and he doesn't crave it himself, you're not a good match in that area. If he craves a kind of humiliation that you're not interested in giving, same thing. And if humiliation doesn't interest him at all, or it turns him off- then you're wasting both your time if you go there.
COMMUNICATE with him. Get to know his needs and desires, and your own- and how they match up.
Also: humiliation can be done very well without punishment! Not everyone needs or wants a reward/punishment dynamic.
FUNishment can be yummy if you both crave it, but true punishment is just not necessary unless you and your partner both feel that it is. The idea of a punishment/reward dynamic bores me to tears, for example. But I love to thoroughly humiliate my slave, and he loves it too. But even with that in common, we still have to talk about everything so that we make sure that the things we do are working for both of us, in that area. We're not mind readers. We talk.
And punishment is a separate issue, as I said above- but if my slaveboy needed a reward/punishment dynamic, he'd be the wrong slave for me.
The way to have experiences that are fulfilling for both of you is to make sure you're with a partner whose needs and desires are compatible with yours. Communication and compatibility are key.
Explore, and have FUN! [:)]
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