theRose4U
Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MHOO314
This is really addressed to the over 40 something male submissives, but I am sure as always, there will be spirited thoughts from many venues.
I was conversing last night with a friend who has wrestled with his submission for over a year now---last night he opened up a lot of himself--without intimate details, I have tried to capture the gist below--
He is an over 45 something--who is alone--talented, bright, a failed marriage eons ago--and the last parent deceased a year ago now--he has an active athletic life--but he is faced with his now "looming mortality" and the fact that he is alone--so he has surrounded himself with women--women who will gladly accept his offer for lunch or dinner, accept his extravagant gifts--but who are otherwise meaningless and he is meaningless to them--they don't remember his birthday, don't say thank you and well you get the picture--(no sexual intimacy by choice either)--he has wrestled with his submission for a year now--mostly centered around his cock and its mind of its own--in the conversation last night, he mentioned and opened up about his extreme loneliness and a statement: " I think men my age seek submission as a means to avoid loneliness--as a ploy to have some kind of female companionship, its the latest "line" ".
Thoughts?
I would say that from what you've said and your general part of the country that this could very easily be my alpha. I knew him for a year before we became involved and it was the steriotypical playboy behavior. Arm candy is a wonderful thing but is also a shallow and self forfilling prophecy. To all on the outside I bet he's the man with a plan, the man's man and has a herd of adoring georgous women that keeps the boys at the golf club drooling.
It's meeting someone that sees through the facade that breaks this spell. A little tough love and a boot in the arse if necessary that can wake them up. It's not an easy process to get into reality but one that if they want to change will be necessary. It's highly likely that this may be a ploy to get some kink time and only you can decide how you feel about that. Frankly taking a man that by all other accounts has it together some Domme time may be the kick in the pants he needs to do what he really desires...assuming another meaningful intimate relationship.
My alpha and I still communicate from time to time and he tells me of situations he's found himself in. I give as much advice as I think he can take then draw little dotted lines to a coarse of action. Once he comes up with the desired coarse of action he usually asks me why after all these years I still help/ care about him. My reply is always simply this...I know that I can give you the swift kick in the arse that you need to pull your head out and see daylight then know in the morning heart mind and soul I still love you. Makes my switchy little heart melt to hear that low rumbling laugh before he calls me his sweet beloved. Then goes back to his life...devoid of close intimate love, always authoritative and in control and always as a wall to the outside world of who he is and insecurites he carries. I was devoted to this man for years and only made it past a few of the walls that he kept up. Even his own family thought we'd marry someday but even they have come to accept that he's stubborn mule headed and will never change for the desires of anyone...no matter the love they have for him and he for them.
Boys are stupid sometimes' it's easier to just hit them with rocks.
< Message edited by theRose4U -- 5/7/2006 12:59:18 PM >
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RE: Is it a loneliness ploy? - 
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