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Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 5:42:37 PM   
justabear225


Posts: 1
Joined: 3/7/2011
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Alright. So I'm fat, big bone, BBW whatever you want to call it. It's who I am and it isn't going to change. I eat healthy. I walk everywhere (don't have a car so I mean everywhere) and because of where I live it can be quite work out (this place is one hill after another) and I do excersise when I find the time. So now that's out of the way, please no negative comments about how it might help if I lost weight and all that stuff. My question is, are there any doms/masters out there that actually like/don't mind overweight people? I mean, I know there are some but most of them are usually 35+. Are there any that are 30 and below? I can't be the only sub that this was bugging so I decided to ask.
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 6:44:39 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Naaaaaaa we took em out the back near the dunny at the bottom of the paddock and shot them.. Too much competition.. 

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Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 6:55:51 PM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
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there are, definitely. my late M liked chubbier chicks. just be yourself, and be honest about who you are (which you very clearly are, kudos to you ^_^) and you'll find someone who likes you for you.
and i totally know how you feel; i'm not thin by any stretch of the word, but i dance, and exercise and do yoga. i am planning on ramping it up to get rid of the weight i gained while grieving M, but i'm probably never going to be "skinny," nor do i want to be. anyone who likes me will like me for who i am, and that's that.
that said, i'm mostly into mid-30s to mid-40s guys. =p i don't usually relate well to younger guys.


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Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 7:18:27 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: justabear225

Are there any that are 30 and below? I can't be the only sub that this was bugging so I decided to ask.


Greetings,

I can honestly attest that they're alive and kicking. But I should preface my comments with an important acknowledgment. Some men have a notable preference for larger women. They don't always articulate this. A few aren't completely opposed depending on other factors. And there are those that will not go there. All have aesthetic ideals and a scale they work within. The level of importance that he places on the ideal is what you need to be aware of.

Also, you've indicated that you're comfortable with your size and don't anticipate making changes. Please be aware that some men will take you on under the explicit idea (not always shared) that you will lose the excess weight. You can address the subject in the manner you deem best, but if change is not a possibility I'd bring it up myself. Allow him to decide if it is something that he's willing to live with. Best of luck.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


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His will; my fate.

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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 7:21:43 PM   
frazzle


Posts: 1212
Joined: 6/20/2009
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Most people, dom/sub/male/female see you as a person, unless you are the one concentrating on your size/weight.

Be you, be confident, stop making excuses. (oh and i havent viewed your profile)

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 7:21:45 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
She is so so sweet. LBP is more like the mommy of CM, always holding hands and making nice noises.. Nothing wrong with that of course and it really is sweet and refreshing. Just missing humor though still that may come in time..  We love ya LBP, darlin heart..

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to LillyBoPeep)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 10:36:36 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
Joined: 3/19/2010
Status: offline
Honestly...?

i wouldn't have noticed you were overweight if you hadn't mentioned it.
Are you getting messages from a bunch of creeps, or something? People sometimes treat this site like some kind of meat market. i wouldn't pay any attention to all that. The delete button is your friend.

P.S.- i think you're cute. If i was a guy and a Dom, i would totally fuck you. Oh, wait. Is it weird to say that to a stranger? Don't mind me. Carry on.

pam

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 11:11:56 PM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
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Well what the fuck is stopping you?   Fucking is not exclusively reserved for males or Doms y'know??? Stop over thinking and start over-doing... 

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to gungadin09)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 11:17:32 PM   
gungadin09


Posts: 3232
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Okay, justabear225, if you're ever in Fresno, you let me know.

pam

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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/8/2011 11:25:49 PM   
Palliata


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Joined: 8/9/2010
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Is there anybody out there...Is there anybody out there...Just nod if you can hear me...Is there aaaaanyboooodyyy home...

Sorry, I love that song :D

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I speak not of The Way, but only My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

I'm male. I know it sounds female. Work with me.

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 12:30:27 AM   
MstrssScarlet


Posts: 633
Joined: 6/3/2005
From: Indianapolis, Indiana
Status: offline
Okay, I DID sneak a peak at your profile. You have an extremely long list of things you enjoy or want to try for someone so new to the lifestyle. Female submissives are at a *premium in the lifestyle and I would be willing to bet that you're not going to have a problem with anyone overlooking a few extra pounds. Good luck!

*There might be more to go around if some of the dom/dommes would quit being so greedy - wanting two or more for themselves. Give em up!
Unfortunately you are too young for me and I'm the wrong sex.

Mistress Scarlet

_____________________________

"Say, that hurts a little bit" "And you don't like to be hurt do ya?" "I don't know...kinda fun sometimes if it's done in the right spirit."
Jean Harlow in The Beast of the City

(in reply to Palliata)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 1:25:17 AM   
IronBear


Posts: 9008
Joined: 6/19/2005
From: Beenleigh, Qld, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: justabear225

Alright. So I'm fat, big bone, BBW whatever you want to call it. It's who I am and it isn't going to change. I eat healthy. I walk everywhere (don't have a car so I mean everywhere) and because of where I live it can be quite work out (this place is one hill after another) and I do excersise when I find the time. So now that's out of the way, please no negative comments about how it might help if I lost weight and all that stuff. My question is, are there any doms/masters out there that actually like/don't mind overweight people? I mean, I know there are some but most of them are usually 35+. Are there any that are 30 and below? I can't be the only sub that this was bugging so I decided to ask.


Just checked your profile.. Looks jolly good to me. Ok I'm more that three times your age so I'm out of the picture and I live in the Land Down Under too.

You are pretty, sound intelligent and I love the interests list. You size is no issue with me for my wife is also a BBGW as are a number of our female friends.. Even your age is not a hassel. I was 55 when I collared my first slave on line and two years later I re-collared her in reality. You and you alone need to decide the age bracket that you are prepared to accept. remember untill you are collared you are in charge.

_____________________________

Iron Bear

Master of Bruin Cottage

http://www.bruincottage.org

Your attitude, words & actions are yours. Take responsibility for them and the consequences they incur.

D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 3:40:26 AM   
aerten


Posts: 6
Joined: 2/14/2011
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quote:

My question is, are there any doms/masters out there that actually like/don't mind overweight people? I mean, I know there are some but most of them are usually 35+. Are there any that are 30 and below? I can't be the only sub that this was bugging so I decided to ask.


I used to wonder the same thing, honestly, when I took a good look at the ages of the Doms that were interested in me. Always at least a decade and a half my senior, and it turned into a confidence issue for me. Then I realized that Master Right (for me, at least) wasn't going to be who I wanted or expected. He was going to be who I needed. That took age mostly out of the equation for me.

You're not going to have any trouble finding plenty of Doms that are interested in you, but you do need to keep in mind that men your age tend to run and hide from intelligent girls that know what they want. *grins* So you might have to hit the search feature and start doing the approaching, yourself.


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i'm perfectly entitled to my opinion, and you're just as entitled to ignore it completely.

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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 3:54:17 AM   
dreamerdreaming


Posts: 2839
Status: offline
OP, I'm sure there are plenty of people of all ages who either like or don't mind having a fat partner. But you're not that fat, really! You're totally fuckalicious.

Just carry yourself with confidence, and be happy being your authentic self. That's the kind of person that is is very attractive, right? Someone who's comfy with who they are, and keeps a positive attitude. That's the kind of person you'd like to be with, right? Like attracts like. Good luck- and welcome to the forums! Explore, and have FUN!



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(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 4:57:46 AM   
LillyBoPeep


Posts: 6873
Joined: 12/29/2010
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IronBear

LBP is more like the mommy of CM


the mommy of CM? hahaha ^_^
sweet sentiment, IronBear -- thankies muchly
(i have humor, it just hides on occasion. =p)


_____________________________

Midwestern Girl

"Obey your Master." Metallica


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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 7:27:14 AM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aerten

You're not going to have any trouble finding plenty of Doms that are interested in you, but you do need to keep in mind that men your age tend to run and hide from intelligent girls that know what they want. *grins* So you might have to hit the search feature and start doing the approaching, yourself.


The OP has nothing to worry about. I speak to men in the age range she's looking for and have for years. And I'm far from being Miss Twiggy. The issue with the Internet is the omission of the physical element. It's much easier to disregard someone based on qualifiers that may be genuine but can't be offset by other traits gleaned from interaction. But the door swings in both directions. The gentleman that might be inclined to say no based on appearance may 'see' what he's usually oblivious to through the individual's profile.

My Starbucks experiments have taught me a thing or two. I put some of it in my original message, but I will add this little nugget. Take care of yourself. It isn't merely the weight but the whole package that makes a big difference. Good skin, nice hair, and figure flattering clothes go a very long way. However, that's just a smidgen of the truth. The real kicker is allowing your submission to shine through. Many do the reverse and bury it out of fear of rejection or violation. Don't. There is something wonderfully beautiful about a surrendered woman and if you follow my advice you'll see the expression I'm speaking of. It completely changes the landscape.

And I have an aesthetic preference. But I've found that most men desire (read really wish for this but believe it's never going to happen) a woman that can be the very thing most are tucking away. When you're able to admit this and share it without a hint of concern, they eat it up every time. Including those supposedly immature ones that are aesthetically driven. That's a girl worth coming home to, and the one very few are greeting at the door. Keep that in mind.

Namaste,

~porcelaine


_____________________________

His will; my fate.

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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 8:52:20 AM   
Falcor64


Posts: 51
Joined: 11/24/2004
Status: offline
Short answer: yes, though it may take some looking. As others have said, though, you have the advantage- there are a lot more male doms than female subs! So, feel free to initiate conversations with likely people, and put your best foot forward. Find folks with interests like yours and chat with them. That's actually a good way to start a friendship/relationship anyway.

Something else- get involved in your local community if you can. Again, just get to know people as people first- that'll also ward off the doms who are just looking to take your kinky cherry and move on too.

Luck in your search,
Falcor

(in reply to porcelaine)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 8:59:22 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
I am glad to hear such positive replies to the OP.

I am just curious though; where are all these fantastic Doms who appreciate fabulous women?

They must live in the Midwest or in Europe, certainly not NJ or NY.


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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 1:41:08 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
I'm curvy too and online get approached by men of all ages and races.

My weight has fluctuated wildly over the years. In my experience offline, white guys are more into Barbies and black and latino men more into curviness, so when I was heavy, felt less self-conscious / more sexy around these guys.

(in reply to justabear225)
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RE: Are there any out there....? - 3/9/2011 4:11:35 PM   
vegetablelamb


Posts: 40
Joined: 7/29/2010
From: The Cabbage Patch
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I was actually surprised to see a sort of a decrease in "must be fit/slim" Doms; I think us curvy ladies are in luck. All in the luck of the draw? I hope you find what you're looking for! :)

(in reply to kalikshama)
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