TexasMaam -> RE: Things always get a little confusing as I evolve (5/6/2006 9:57:22 PM)
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If your experiences are anything like Mine have been, yes, the more experience you have r/t, the more likely you are to clarify your interests and define your BDSM identity. The only time in My life I switched, I ended up with a smartass, sarcastic, pompous, mean spirited, resistant sub; the sweet, genteel, honorable sub I had come to know and adore was suddenly a total and complete ass**** that I'd never even like to sit close to on a park bench! I'll never switch again. Never. I still have urges to experience pain, and I'm fortunate to know a Male Dom whom I trust to session me on rare occasion. He treats Me as his equal. He's smart enough to never treat Me as a sub, only as a peer who wants to experience pain for pain's sake. He knows I'm not aroused that way, don't want to 'serve' him in any capacity whatsoever, there's no sexual contact involved and I'm lucky to have that outlet all these years! He tells Me it allows him to not only hone his skills with a rope, whip, wand and cane, it allows him to push the envelope because I'm more pain tolerant than any fem sub he's known. It allows Me to fulfill My cravings for pain and bondage while maintaining My Domme persona with my male sub. The waters never get muddy, I never have a resistant or condescending jerk to contend with or correct, the relationships don't get muddled because the boundaries remain intact. Just My experience... Good Luck to you with yours, TexasMaam
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