manonabike
Posts: 7
Joined: 3/26/2011
Status: offline
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Things to know about me:
I have very limited BDSM experience. I am a veteran of long term monogamous relationships. My interest in BDSM is a small part titillation, and mainly due to wanting a submissive partner. My thinking about this could be sorted into those two basic categories. There is what I get off fantasizing about, and then there is what I want for daily life. The crossover comes from what is behind the sexual play that is also inherent in the basis of a workable relationship. I consider expression through kinky sex to convey a personal truth about emotional needs and preferences. This I surmise from speculating about what I read online, as if that isn't a big waste of time.
Biographically I am single with average looks and income. No sugar daddy here, but thanks for asking. I have been told I am handsome and sexy, but people lie. I think I look goofy but in a good way. I have no children that I know about. I have raised other people's kids along the way. My thoughts on having a relationship with someone who still has kids at home are less enthusiastic now, only because if things break down then losing the relationship with the child is by far worse than just breaking up with the mother. I'm old enough now so it's not likely to be the case that anyone I date will still have kids at home. I won't stay up nights worrying about it. My health is pretty good, without any specific issues, just the beginnings of what age does to us all. I wear contacts now. My hair seems to have undergone some sort of referendum, some of it choosing to stay, the rest up and left.
Circumstantially I am temporarily located by Austin, TX. I travel for work, and have for the past several years. I can settle in someplace or stay on the road. Settling in would take having a reason, as the nomadic life suits me, too. I plan on being around here for a few more months as things stand now.
Sexually in terms of my orientation I am straight. There is absolutely no doubt about my being attracted to women and not to men. It's not a choice, just how I am. In terms of behavior I have tried and liked gay sex, too. It felt good, and I might have some more at some point. The thing about it is, because the pleasure is purely physical and limited to the moment, I am much less motivated to want sex with men as with women, and so it's not something I go looking for. I am probably safe thinking of it as something I did when I was younger and attractive to gay men, accepting the occasional offer, which now that I am older is unlikely to recur. I am open minded about sex all around within legal limits. I don't have any confirmed fetishes, just a few things I fantasize about. D/s is interesting to me because as far as I can tell the premise matches perfectly how I already feel about women and respond to any woman in particular. Equal rights is great but when it comes to an intimate relationship, something ancient applies regardless. Sexually if I am not dominating then I am just sort of going along to get some. Lately I no longer want to have sex unless it honestly suits my feelings. I also have no interest in recreational sex anymore outside of a relationship while single. Now sex is a means to an end and not an end in itself. The goal is intimacy, as close a connection as can be, which happens with all the intervening barriers removed. D/s is a way there, I suspect. It matches what I experienced in previous relationships although at the time no such labels were applied.
In person I am apt to listen more than talk. Silence is welcome. I seek clarity in the relationship roles. I have strong primal feelings to own a woman, but it has to be voluntary on her part. Submission is an active thing not just passive acceptance.
I am ready to start something immediately by meeting in person. The purpose of the meeting would be to sense how it feels being together. That is the starting place for me. Emails serve only to arrange that meeting. I have no preference regarding the outcome of meeting. It will either be obvious to us both that we should do it again, or not. Unless it is obvious there is no point. I am looking to recognize an obvious potential first, and then to follow up on it when it does appear.
This is not my scene as such. It has elements I need. It is a place where people meet when looking for a D/s type of relationship, which I need. The rest could be fun, too. I can go buy a candle if that ever becomes necessary. My T-shirt would make a good blindfold. Bondage is likely just from how I make the bed anyway.
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