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Profile - 4/5/2011 10:22:18 PM

sharkyone

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/3/2011
Status: offline

Would a few of the ladies here read my profile and give me some feedback on it? I'm trying to make sure it's appropriate and if you see some room for improvement please feel free to say so.

Sharky

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Profile - 4/5/2011 11:05:29 PM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

sharky-I think you have a great start to your profile. You heeded the call to keep your kinky laundry list out of it; you posted a friendly, smiling face pic, and you did a good job describing the nuts and bolts of your vanilla life.

Things I'd want to see: change 's i g h t' to 's i t e.' Put the part about 'anything you want to know about me just ask' at the very end or say something like 'I welcome any questions you may have.' You're a busy guy...how do you plan to fit a real-time partner into your schedule? While it's a given you'd like a strong dominant, what other qualities in a partner would you feel best matched with? Do you mesh well with someone funny? Serious? Nature-loving? Spiritual? Athletic? Adventurous? Family/home-focused? What qualities do you have to offer her in the vanilla sense? Consider answering the question 'why submission'? It's an important giveaway of what this lifestyle means to you. If the answer is 'kinky sex', say so. It's not likely to win you any brownie points but it's honest. If there's more to it than that for you...generously expound! THAT is what can set you apart, especially to the skilled, experienced lifestyle Domme who enjoys the whole psychological and emotionally connecting aspect of kink.

Good luck in your revisions, and good luck in your search!
Best,
MDA

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 2

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 12:15:37 AM

LadyNTrainer

Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline

Quite good, with two exceptions.

I would remove this: "If you would like to know more about me feel free to message me. Serious inquiries only please." It doesn't add much, and it dilutes your message IMO.

I would also remove "No freaking drama please.." as that is a negative statement and not attractive even to people who also don't like drama. Basically, it *is* drama and should be avoided entirely.

_____________________________

Your dominant Personal Trainer for fitness and body shaping in the lifestyle. Let my fetish be your motivation.

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 3

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 12:55:23 AM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

quote:

I would also remove "No freaking drama please.." as that is a negative statement and not attractive even to people who also don't like drama. Basically, it *is* drama and should be avoided entirely.

Yes, LadyNT, I agree and considered mentioning that. I think I cotton to what he's getting at but he will have more luck screening subtly from behind the curtain without offending readers. Good call!

MDA

< Message edited by MistressDarkArt -- 4/6/2011 12:56:23 AM >

(in reply to LadyNTrainer)

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Post #: 4

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 7:12:21 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

Yeah, I'm making a comment on the profile and I'm not a woman. So sue me.

The huge plus of your profile is that you come across as a regular guy who'd be good to spend time with. Wimmins eat that up.

The only thing I'd change is that since you have a son, explain what your status is. Are you divorced? Does the ex have contact with you still, and how do you get along with her?

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to MistressDarkArt)

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Post #: 5

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 2:31:36 PM

sharkyone

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/3/2011
Status: offline

I love and agree with all of the feedback. I will go back and rework it, following all of your suggestions. Hopefully I won't have to rely on this profile much longer, I recieved what seems to me ,so far, a legit offer from an awesome lifestyle Dom this past Mon..

I replied back to her via email Monday night and I recieved a reply back this morning. I am excited about the possibilities

So this brings me to another question, in the reply I recieved she stated that she wanted a "begging response" back. What exactly is a "begging response"? In it she wanted details of my submissive fantasies, explain some of the things I think about, a normal pic of myself other than my profile pic, and more about me in general. I know I could just write her what I think she wanted but I want to get it right the first time. I know there's a possibility there may be a difference in what you all believe a "begging response" is, so just let me know what you think and I'll do the best with it that I can.

Thanks to all of you for your replies!!!
Sharkyone.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

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Post #: 6

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 4:14:58 PM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

Sharky, I have to say this rings alarm bells for me just a bit.

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(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 7

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 4:26:49 PM

BonesFromAsh

Posts: 1362
Joined: 6/17/2010
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sharkyone

I love and agree with all of the feedback. I will go back and rework it, following all of your suggestions.

I liked your profile...especially your commitment to your education (4.0 is great!) and to your son. Ever thought of relocating to the northeast?

quote:

Hopefully I won't have to rely on this profile much longer, I recieved what seems to me ,so far, a legit offer from an awesome lifestyle Dom this past Mon.. I replied back to her via email Monday night and I recieved a reply back this morning. I am excited about the possibilities

So this brings me to another question, in the reply I recieved she stated that she wanted a "begging response" back. What exactly is a "begging response"? In it she wanted details of my submissive fantasies, explain some of the things I think about, a normal pic of myself other than my profile pic, and more about me in general. I know I could just write her what I think she wanted but I want to get it right the first time. I know there's a possibility there may be a difference in what you all believe a "begging response" is, so just let me know what you think and I'll do the best with it that I can.

Thanks to all of you for your replies!!!
Sharkyone.

Something about this just doesn't sit right with me. I've no idea what a "begging response" would be and why this person would want one from a total stranger. Sounds a bit too fantasy-laden for my taste. Just be sure to not lose sight of good old common sense.

< Message edited by BonesFromAsh -- 4/6/2011 4:27:32 PM >

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 8

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 5:46:55 PM

sharkyone

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/3/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

quote:

ORIGINAL: sharkyone

I love and agree with all of the feedback. I will go back and rework it, following all of your suggestions.

I liked your profile...especially your commitment to your education (4.0 is great!) and to your son. Ever thought of relocating to the northeast?

quote:

Hopefully I won't have to rely on this profile much longer, I recieved what seems to me ,so far, a legit offer from an awesome lifestyle Dom this past Mon.. I replied back to her via email Monday night and I recieved a reply back this morning. I am excited about the possibilities

So this brings me to another question, in the reply I recieved she stated that she wanted a "begging response" back. What exactly is a "begging response"? In it she wanted details of my submissive fantasies, explain some of the things I think about, a normal pic of myself other than my profile pic, and more about me in general. I know I could just write her what I think she wanted but I want to get it right the first time. I know there's a possibility there may be a difference in what you all believe a "begging response" is, so just let me know what you think and I'll do the best with it that I can.

Thanks to all of you for your replies!!!
Sharkyone.

Something about this just doesn't sit right with me. I've no idea what a "begging response" would be and why this person would want one from a total stranger. Sounds a bit too fantasy-laden for my taste. Just be sure to not lose sight of good old common sense.

Northeast sounds way to cold for me :) I've got family roots here in Texas that won't let me relocate. It sounds a little fantasy laden to me also, I'm being very careful with my correspodence to her. Thanks for the encouragement BonesFromAsh

You too PeonforHer, thanks for the replies to my PM's.

You know, it's really hard for me to step out of my vanilla life and try something here. It's really ashamed you have to be really careful who you deal with and what info you share with them.Oh well, thanks ya'll.

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)

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Post #: 9

RE: Profile - 4/6/2011 6:38:52 PM

sharkyone

Posts: 10
Joined: 4/3/2011
Status: offline

.

< Message edited by sharkyone -- 4/6/2011 6:51:16 PM >

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 10

RE: Profile - 4/7/2011 3:39:37 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

When you find out what a begging response is, please enlighten the rest of us.

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 11

RE: Profile - 4/7/2011 8:07:39 AM

LadyNTrainer

Posts: 1584
Joined: 5/20/2009
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sharkyone
I recieved what seems to me ,so far, a legit offer from an awesome lifestyle Dom this past Mon..

Huge. Red. Flag. If you received an offer of slavery, a 24/7 relationship, a move across country, or anything else of this nature, based only on a few brief words on the Internet from a stranger who has never met you and doesn't know you from Adam, it's from fantasy land. Being kinky doesn't mean you get to throw away all of the common sense rules for human relationships. Would you agree to marry someone under the same circumstances? If not, beware of this.

quote:

So this brings me to another question, in the reply I recieved she stated that she wanted a "begging response" back. What exactly is a "begging response"?

This may mean different things to different people. And to me it's another red flag; she wants/expects submission before you have gotten to know one another well enough to figure out whether a serious or long term D/s relationship is even going to work between you.

On the remote chance that she's not an idiot or a scammer or a guy who thinks that it's fun to jerk other guys' chains, I would simply suggest asking her what she means by a begging response. Indicate that you want to be pleasing and compliant, but you want to make sure you understand her wishes clearly.

_____________________________

Your dominant Personal Trainer for fitness and body shaping in the lifestyle. Let my fetish be your motivation.

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 12

RE: Profile - 4/7/2011 8:15:13 AM

OttersSwim

Posts: 2860
Joined: 9/1/2008
Status: offline

And if "begging" includes a credit card number, or a "gift", click the NEXT button and move on...

_____________________________

I am on a journey of authenticity and self.

(in reply to LadyNTrainer)

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Post #: 13

RE: Profile - 4/10/2011 9:26:45 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

I once begged for a responce but the only one I heard back from was Steven. Steven I wanted to hear from women only.

(in reply to OttersSwim)

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Post #: 14

RE: Profile - 5/29/2011 6:45:57 PM

SHAZAVAH

Posts: 5
Joined: 2/23/2011
Status: offline

Excuse me, MDA, can you please look at mine? I've been here for a few months and still haven't had a F2F...what can I do better? THANK YOU!

(in reply to Dnomyar)

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Post #: 15

RE: Profile - 5/29/2011 6:49:33 PM

FelineFae

Posts: 7756
Joined: 1/23/2009
From: i do wander everywhere...
Status: offline

Try this;
http://www.collarchat.com/m_3057130/tm.htm

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Individual results may vary.

(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 16

RE: Profile - 5/29/2011 9:31:37 PM

SexyBossyBBW

Posts: 1693
Joined: 2/25/2010
Status: offline

Dear Sharkyone, The single biggest problem with your profile I noticed, was that there was none... Except interest list. The second (okay first again), is that you are 18y.o., 5'11", and weigh 20lbs. I know they say you can't be too, rich or too thin, but I'm going to have to disagree.

Good luck, M

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(in reply to sharkyone)

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Post #: 17

RE: Profile - 5/30/2011 5:06:10 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SHAZAVAH

Excuse me, MDA, can you please look at mine? I've been here for a few months and still haven't had a F2F...what can I do better? THANK YOU!

Your profile is essentially blank. It says you are very Domme and that you're not interested in men.

I'd simply read other profiles and see what kinds of profiles you like, and borrow tips from their writing styles.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to SHAZAVAH)

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Post #: 18

RE: Profile - 5/30/2011 10:52:03 AM

MistressDarkArt

Posts: 5178
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SHAZAVAH

Excuse me, MDA, can you please look at mine? I've been here for a few months and still haven't had a F2F...what can I do better? THANK YOU!

Steven and SBBBW offered good observations. I would speak to your profile essentially the same way I did the OPs...just substitute the correct gender and orientation. Good luck!

(in reply to SHAZAVAH)

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Post #: 19