Its all about ME! Got it? Good!

Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (Full Version)

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Real0ne -> Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/7/2011 11:03:42 PM)
Do you have that in your profile? Are you also seeking long or life term sub/slave? Yes? Yes? then this thread is for you! :) Just curious, for those that have that in their profile or have an intimate understanding of the dynamics involved..... how they square that with the LTR? On the surface it appears that it means reciprocity is inconsequential? I would be very interested in discovering what the core elements of this type of relationship are based upon, what factors form the bond, and the likelihood or batting average of long term success if that is possible to assess?

AcademyForSlaves -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/8/2011 3:32:46 PM)
Hi. I like it when a slave realizes he exists to please me but I also don't mind finding that balance where we're both happy. He's my slave but I know he's only happy when he gets to lick me, touch me, or be petted or beaten by me. There's two of us to consider. He rubs my back, I'll scratch his. lol

Slrn733561 -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/8/2011 3:32:54 PM)
We are in a 24/7 IRL Femdom relation. So, it's all about Her. Forget what you saw on internet, just picture someone (the slave) who craves to please his woman. On the other hand a Mistress who loves to be served, wants to take decisions whithout discusions. Can you imagine a symbiosis where slave is pleased when he sees his Mistress' pleasure while Mistress enjoys Her life. Reciprocity is build in in this way. The only thing is that you have to forget about the always whipped slave and the sadistic Mistress. In fact BDSM play is not needed. Correcting the slave might be necessarry ( a bad habbit ?), and a sound whipping might be the result, but most of the time slave would be trying to do his best. And he is confident that Mistresses decisions are for the best.

Real0ne -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/9/2011 9:29:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Slrn733561Can you imagine a symbiosis where slave is pleased when he sees his Mistress' pleasure while Mistress enjoys Her life. The "Its all about me" philosophy suggests that the symbiosis you describe is irrelevant and therefore not part of your concern? The "Its all about me" philosophy on its face at first glance seems to suggest some sort of dominant fantasy rather than anything that can become truly functional long term which is why I asked the question. In your situation it appears that the needs of the dominant intersects what turns you on or by some default satisfies your needs. People change and interests vary throughout time, what will you do when those intersecting commonalities you share today no longer exist as a result of that change? More so what if those changing interests wander outside your boundaries? Basically I want to know if the words "its all about me" are literal or set up as an idiom and in either case how to functionally construct it in a real life LTR?

leadership527 -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/9/2011 10:43:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Real0ne Basically I want to know if the words "its all about me" are literal or set up as an idiom and in either case how to functionally construct it in a real life LTR? So ask yourself, does this pass the sanity test? Do you really think that someone could dedicate their entire life to the meeting of someone else's needs, hopes, desires, and dreams and yet have none of his or her own met in return? Have you ever met an actual living human (in the real world, not on the internet) who had no needs?

Real0ne -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/10/2011 11:49:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leadership527 quote: ORIGINAL: Real0ne Basically I want to know if the words "its all about me" are literal or set up as an idiom and in either case how to functionally construct it in a real life LTR? So ask yourself, does this pass the sanity test? Do you really think that someone could dedicate their entire life to the meeting of someone else's needs, hopes, desires, and dreams and yet have none of his or her own met in return? Have you ever met an actual living human (in the real world, not on the internet) who had no needs? I dont know if it passes the sanity test or not? It does seem on the claustrophobic side but rather than just jump to a conclusion on the matter based on my feelings alone, I had hoped to put it up here and get input from those who say it in their profiles (or subs that serve those who said it in their profiles), hopefully to see how well that particular style works? Of course its not limited to only them, all opinions are appreciated.... Never know what floats peoples boats until ya ask them.....

SaharahEve -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/11/2011 7:57:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Slrn733561 We are in a 24/7 IRL Femdom relation. So, it's all about Her. Forget what you saw on internet, just picture someone (the slave) who craves to please his woman. On the other hand a Mistress who loves to be served, wants to take decisions whithout discusions. Can you imagine a symbiosis where slave is pleased when he sees his Mistress' pleasure while Mistress enjoys Her life. Reciprocity is build in in this way. The only thing is that you have to forget about the always whipped slave and the sadistic Mistress. In fact BDSM play is not needed. Correcting the slave might be necessarry ( a bad habbit ?), and a sound whipping might be the result, but most of the time slave would be trying to do his best. And he is confident that Mistresses decisions are for the best. I support your response in all its direct simplicity. Even if you can't relate as a reader, you can understand conceptually, at least, that there is a symbiosis, and that is the pleasure in the slave to serve and the pleasure in the Female Keeper in being served. We need to remember that "LTR" is arbitrary, too. Even if the Female Keeper and slave dynamic only lasts a year, that doesn't invalidate the relevance of the servitude. So long as both are fulfilled in their respective roles, I've never really felt there is a reason why the dynamic can't survive (and thrive) for many years, and it does, with the right combination of elements.

NuevaVida -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/11/2011 9:30:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Real0ne The "Its all about me" philosophy on its face at first glance seems to suggest some sort of dominant fantasy rather than anything that can become truly functional long term which is why I asked the question. In my past personal experience, being "ALL" about the owner (in the literal sense) was not sustainable. If a creature is starved long enough, it withers and eventually dies, unless it just wanders off, first. When basic emotional needs are not fed and the owner continually takes and does not give, when what the servant gives requires more than he/she is capable of (particularly when not being fed), then what? Because of this and my tendency to take such statements literally, "It's all about me/you/him/her/them/etc." is something I see as completely unrealistic for long term, and potentially unhealthy even in short term. Unless it's a short term situation of people getting their kinky groove on, I don't give those words much credibility. But then I'm selfish like that. I kind of like being happy. [;)]

VaguelyCurious -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/11/2011 9:37:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Real0ne The "Its all about me" philosophy on its face at first glance seems to suggest some sort of dominant fantasy You sure about that? I've had a lot of men asking for this sort of dynamic, but I've seen relatively few women offering it (and those women have often been the women whose you look at and think 'are you actually a fella?', or the ones who look like they've spent too long watching male-generated porn and not enough time thinking about what they actually want, making them kind of inadequate for the job at hand in the first place). Having it 'all about me' puts a lot of pressure on the D - what you want can't just be enough for you, it has to be enough for two people otherwise it all collapses. I can sustain that for 24 hours (which is a lot of fun), but I don't think I could do it continuously.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/11/2011 6:37:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NuevaVida "It's all about me/you/him/her/them/etc." is something I see as completely unrealistic for long term, and potentially unhealthy even in short term. Unless it's a short term situation of people getting their kinky groove on, I don't give those words much credibility. But then I'm selfish like that. I kind of like being happy. [;)] This. Thank you for saving my fingers, NV. :)

NuevaVida -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/11/2011 7:19:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss This. Thank you for saving my fingers, NV. :) Any time, sunshine! [:)]

stellauk -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/12/2011 10:41:30 AM)
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AngelDaRainha -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/13/2011 2:16:00 PM)
It's about him as much as it's about me. What makes it a true power exchange is that I'm in control of how, when, where things happen. To say it's all about me, is unrealisitic. Because if he gets pleasure in seeing Me pleased, he's gained pleasure in my smile or my praise, then it's just as much about him at that point as it is me. Yes, he pleased me, but to see my smile, or to know he pleased me, fulfills his need. Submission has never been about never having your own needs met, it's about finding that One that knows how to interact your needs with His/Her own. They decide when, how and where those needs are met. I could sit around and please myself all day, and no I don't mean sexually, I could do things that "I" love to do and ignore the world. But honestly, where's the excitement and challenge in that? I take my needs and his needs and weave them together. Sometimes he may not even realize he is having his own need met, until it's all said and done, he walks (or crawls) away feeling so fulfilled and eager to serve again. Notice I said his "needs" not his kinks or fetishes. I do not allow a man's kinks or fetishes to control Me or him.

SnowRanger -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/13/2011 2:24:15 PM)
WOW!!!! Now I know what you ladies mean when you say "Be Still My Beating Heart!"

pyroaquatic -> RE: Its all about ME! Got it? Good! (4/13/2011 11:40:57 PM)
From personal experience I need touch, caressing, petting, positivity, and all other human-y type gestures and words like I need food, water, air, fire, and shelter. Otherwise I might as well dehydrate and starve. Just saying.

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