Alright, psychology 101

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Termyn8or -> Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 3:25:07 AM)
I'll start here. There has been an outpouring of expressions of sympathy, empathy and whatever else for those who suffer in Japan as we speak (so to speak). Why ? Well I am going to tell you why and I am going to base it on the base, that is that I won't need any reference materials for display. Now to do this properly we have to start in the past. Perhaps the past of other, perhaps our own. The first thing to understand is that you are in control of your feelings, just some people don't know how to control them correctly. First you have to know how the machine works. Let's have a hypothetical test right now. You are a Man, wherever you are the kid jumps up on you, SMEEEESHING one of your balls. You do not feel anger. You do not want to retaliate against the kid because you know fuckin why. But some guy bumps into you a bit too hard at the bar and doesn't apologize properly, that is the signal for war. Intercene strife on a degree which these mere mortals have never witnessed. So anyway, they now have where you can TEXT a donation. Now I am over here fifty years old and I have never seen a charity actually solve a problem. I had a few glimpses into that racket, both the church and the charity. You know that a charity that used to operate in Cleveland paid for their truck drivers' cigarettes ? I really don't have much against that, but we are talking starving children eating mud, literally. I think I could spare getting that ivory backscratcher for the backyard yacht right now, maybe. Why not ? Why ? You gonna text up 90999 and send the Japs ten bucks ? Go right ahead if that's what you need to make you feel good. I have no problem with that. Now as I said psychology, I meant that of the world. When people don't like the US what happens ? They get "Well you could be in Russia" or later "Brazil" (which was actually really great from what I heard), or what else, Antfuckingarctica ? But I digress. (if that is possible) The second or third original point was why text those people all that money. Now I don't want you to laugh, I warn you, this is something to think about but it has about 2,457% joke potential. Those people don't need any fucking money, the fucking stores are all washed away anyway. Now I know my way of looking at life makes pragmatiam look like a secret cult tht never leaves some basement in Utah, but sometimes people just have to agree with me. Here and there. The fact is that you give to make yourself feel better. Regardless of the fact that charity is big business and that money does not go to the commoner, it comes from the commoner. The people who take money get to take more and everyfuckingone knows it. Give till it hurts. Hurts what ? You argue about Soros. Well he is an asshole, but so what, he isn't all that bad. What do you want him to do, just give away all his fucking money and go live with Mom ? Bullshit, and we all know it. I wouldn't and neither would you. Why can't we take meat, canned goods, cooking shit and money and blankets and just go over there and give them out ? EVEN AT OUR OWN EXPENSE. We can't because it is against the "law". Look into it, you'll be surprised. Make sure to scan the PATRIOT act while you're at it. So they declare that they will handle this and we have our hands tied, and not consentually I might add. So they give you an outlet. Express your joy and motherhood and brotherhood and colors of green and gray. The color of money. That is your work, and to what your value has been reduced. A piece of paper. (well up until......) They then play you like a violin, with one ear saying its not worth shit and the other saying that it is your life's blood. It is neither. What you have to realize is that these "people" live in a confined reality. Most of you do too. It took me fifty fucking years with one hell of a good start to even grasp this concept. I can't expect anyone to do it, but for one way. To profess this as I am doing right now. That some few can understand and it might gain them some time. Because we grow old too fast and smart too slow. If this mish mosh jumpstarts anone, it was worth my time. The world is part of a universe. You do not understand that vastness. I can say that it is a million times a million times and it will just wssssshhhhhh past you. I was forced to understand numbers. pico, nano, giga, tera, all of it before most of you ever heard the terms, even though I get them mixed up once in a while. Most people can't even understand the concept of a thousand. Why the fuck do you think these asshole car dealers have specials "$99", or "$999" or even "$9,999". One dollar trips it to the next number of figures. It becomes a hundred, a grand or ten grand with an extra dollar. There is almost nowhere in the world that does this 999999999 shit, except the US. You fucking know it. We can take this world back from those who are fucking wrecking it for us. But for that to happern we need real awareness, not Fox. Not BBC5. Not nothing. You need to make the calculations in your brain. That's what the fuck it is for. You don't want to be a fool, then don't. If you're stupid, just don't trust anyone. A smart fool is not going to be better off than a stupid not fool, unless the not fool is ignorant. It is so easy to manipulate people it is disgusting, really. All I want is for someone to wake up before we all go into the citadel or whateer and sit in those chairs and shit. There is still a world out there. T^T

GreedyTop -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 3:35:35 AM)
What's wrong with giving, to make yourself feel better? if I could afford to, I'd give some money to one of the ORGANIZATIONS (not PEOPLE) that are providing aid to the stricken area. Why? yes, it would make me feel better, but also because I cant physically be there to help in any way.

sirsholly -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 4:01:55 AM)
There but for the grace of God...

LaTigresse -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 4:45:40 AM)
Except Holly....... God and grace don't really have anything to do with it. I think I understand what Termy is saying. Shit happens, shit happens to people all the damned time. God really hasn't got anything to do with it. People make choices that affect their risk factors. Sadly, innocents, that couldn't chose, get hurt. But it has been happening since mankind was born with a brain to make choices and likely will continue to happen. Big picture, there isn't anything we can REALLY do to help. The places that were destroyed will get repopulated. Choices and risk.

sirsholly -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:04:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse Except Holly....... God and grace don't really have anything to do with it. i respect your opinion [:)] quote: Big picture, there isn't anything we can REALLY do to help. I disagree LaT. I doubt we can make a dent in what Japan needs to recover, but there is a lot we can do Where you ever having a really bad day..plopping along with your typical motivation replaced by negativity..and a total stranger gave you a great big smile or said a friendly word? Suddenly you felt as if you were not quite as alone as you felt, and your morale and motivation were increased. My guess is just knowing there are others they will never meet who care enough to help might just work wonders

stellauk -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:22:54 AM)
I've once opened a season in theatre a month early and changed an opening from Warsaw to Gdynia, some 400 miles away. Why? A little boy called David, aged 8, terminally ill with brain cancer, wanted to spend a day in the theatre - he loved theatre. His mother approached me by e-mail a couple of months beforehand after seeing one of my performances. I couldn't say no. Neither could anyone else, my actors (some even took time off to make the rehearsals), the city president of Gdynia, one of the local theatres, even MacDonalds - David loved MacDonalds. We met David and his Mum at the station on the morning of the performance and he spent the entire day and performance with us. Despite being in pain and in a wheelchair, not one word of complaint came out of David, he had a lot of courage and character that kid. And a sense of humour. And he could mimic people almost perfectly. We all soon forgot about the bittersweet nature of that day. Someone took pictures, we all signed a big birthday card for his birthday a little over a month later. Kept distracting us in the final rehearsal with his wisecracks and impersonations. We then went for a meal in MacDonalds, he could have anything he wanted. We even had the city president come along. David had a cheeseburger and regular fries. He was with us during the group hug with all the actors in the wings prior to the start of the performance. I watched it knelt beside his wheelchair. David died 10 days later. Still aged 8 years old. Charity isn't just about money. Charity is also pretty much about life and death.

sirsholly -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:27:05 AM)
Just...wow. Stella, you are such a gift [:)]

twistedwillow -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:35:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sirsholly Just...wow. Stella, you are such a gift [:)] Quoted for truth, and cause I have tears in my eyes so I can't see to write something original.

lexora -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 7:40:15 AM)
Boy I want to say something but way out numbered $$ anyway, OP never said don't give just be more careful, also I would look into the companies anyway, many things changed and I remember reading somewhere that as long as around 20% or so is given it is ok to call a charity Most times the 80% goes into the pockets of the people in charge or just gets lost... But as for me... I have no real idea, I like Japan but when this happen I was more or less like "eh" and then I just kept on with my day..

Phoenixpower -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 8:06:14 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Termyn8or We can take this world back from those who are fucking wrecking it for us. yanno....some folks do realise that...back home in the county where I am from, we have four of the 17 nuclear reactors in Germany. Mrs Merkel tried to ease concerns there, with just suspending a decision about extending the lifetime of those...following that tragedy in japan that gave a massive push for people to vote for the green party, chucking out the CDU from that county after 58 years residence there...giving the green party the first chance ever back home to lead a county. Since the 70s we have often demonstrations going on against nuclear power but it sadly seems to have needed another disaster for more to wake up. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-12876083

Missokyst -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 9:39:02 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Termyn8or Those people don't need any fucking money, the fucking stores are all washed away anyway. We give because we are compassionate. I have a roof over my head and food in my fridge. I haven't looked out my house to see everything washed away and my family gone. We give because someday it might be us. I have given to The Red Cross every year for the last 20 or so yrs. None of that text this shit. These are people who actually organize and go to help. I am considering doing that myself when I am ready to cut ties to my life. Money provides more than cash to washed out stores. It is food, shelter, someone to talk to, first aid and the knowlege that someone cares about your plight. What does the American Red Cross do during a disaster? The American Red Cross provides immediate emergency assistance for people who have been affected by a disaster. These include: · Safe Shelter – The American Red Cross works with local authorities and community partners to secure and staff shelters that either provide safety in the midst of a disaster or serve as temporary shelter after homes are damaged or destroyed. Shelters are designed and managed to be a safe haven for families after the disruption of disaster. · Feeding – Red Cross volunteers are trained in providing food to large numbers of people, including not only people directly affected by disaster, but emergency personnel and other workers tasked with helping bring life back to normal. Food may be served at a congregate location, such as a shelter, or from mobile feeding units or Emergency Response Vehicles (ERV). · Mental Health/Emotional Support Services – The American Red Cross has volunteers who are trained mental health professionals, tasked with providing counseling, as needed, for people whose lives have been disrupted by disaster and need someone to lend a caring ear. · Basic First Aid – The American Red Cross has health care workers in its volunteer ranks to provide basic medical care, as needed, for people who have received very minor injury from a disaster, and to help coordinate more advanced medical care from emergency personnel, when needed. · Distribution (Clean up/Comfort items) – During disasters, the American Red Cross will distribute clean up tools and materials and also personal hygiene and comfort items to the community, from both fixed locations and Emergency Response Vehicles driving directly into the community.

slvemike4u -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 10:11:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stellauk I've once opened a season in theatre a month early and changed an opening from Warsaw to Gdynia, some 400 miles away. Why? A little boy called David, aged 8, terminally ill with brain cancer, wanted to spend a day in the theatre - he loved theatre. His mother approached me by e-mail a couple of months beforehand after seeing one of my performances. I couldn't say no. Neither could anyone else, my actors (some even took time off to make the rehearsals), the city president of Gdynia, one of the local theatres, even MacDonalds - David loved MacDonalds. We met David and his Mum at the station on the morning of the performance and he spent the entire day and performance with us. Despite being in pain and in a wheelchair, not one word of complaint came out of David, he had a lot of courage and character that kid. And a sense of humour. And he could mimic people almost perfectly. We all soon forgot about the bittersweet nature of that day. Someone took pictures, we all signed a big birthday card for his birthday a little over a month later. Kept distracting us in the final rehearsal with his wisecracks and impersonations. We then went for a meal in MacDonalds, he could have anything he wanted. We even had the city president come along. David had a cheeseburger and regular fries. He was with us during the group hug with all the actors in the wings prior to the start of the performance. I watched it knelt beside his wheelchair. David died 10 days later. Still aged 8 years old. Charity isn't just about money. Charity is also pretty much about life and death. This was/is just beautiful...thank you ever so much for sharing it [:)] Rest in peace little David....

pahunkboy -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 11:15:22 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: stellauk I've once opened a season in theatre a month early and changed an opening from Warsaw to Gdynia, some 400 miles away. Why? A little boy called David, aged 8, terminally ill with brain cancer, wanted to spend a day in the theatre - he loved theatre. His mother approached me by e-mail a couple of months beforehand after seeing one of my performances. I couldn't say no. Neither could anyone else, my actors (some even took time off to make the rehearsals), the city president of Gdynia, one of the local theatres, even MacDonalds - David loved MacDonalds. We met David and his Mum at the station on the morning of the performance and he spent the entire day and performance with us. Despite being in pain and in a wheelchair, not one word of complaint came out of David, he had a lot of courage and character that kid. And a sense of humour. And he could mimic people almost perfectly. We all soon forgot about the bittersweet nature of that day. Someone took pictures, we all signed a big birthday card for his birthday a little over a month later. Kept distracting us in the final rehearsal with his wisecracks and impersonations. We then went for a meal in MacDonalds, he could have anything he wanted. We even had the city president come along. David had a cheeseburger and regular fries. He was with us during the group hug with all the actors in the wings prior to the start of the performance. I watched it knelt beside his wheelchair. David died 10 days later. Still aged 8 years old. Charity isn't just about money. Charity is also pretty much about life and death. Stunning! What a post! :-)

kiwisub12 -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 2:17:09 PM)
When the twin towers went down, i was stunned and horrified. A true tragedy - and then i heard about stock traders (who don't make minimum wage) widows getting bundles of cash - because they didn't have insurance and they "deserved" it. But Joe Blow who has a car accident and dies - that family gets very little. The sheer numbers of people killed overwhelmes the senses, and makes a tragedy seem worse. It isn't really - Joe Blows family is as grief stricken as the TT widows/widowers. The perception is that more people killed in a single event equals more tragedy/horror/grief - but death is an individual thing and a family thing - not a numbers thing. On the other hand after an earthquake or tsunami, there is food to provide, clothes to be found and medical needs to be met - and these things cost money. We can't make survivors pain less, but we can make day-to-day living a bit easier. So if i can make a strangers day a little easier with my $20, then i'm going for it.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 3:29:38 PM)
Sunny Quote of the Day goes to stellauk [sm=cute.gif] for Charity isn't just about money. Charity is also pretty much about life and death.

NuevaVida -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 4:04:28 PM)
I'd rather put good out there in the world than nothing. So yeah, I'll donate. Even if it only effects one person in a very small way, it made a difference to that one person. A friend of mine went to Port Au Prince, Haiti last year, after their disaster. He had to go with an organization because the airports were wiped out and they could not allow commercial flights in for individuals to just go and hand out food and supplies. Plus, where would such individuals stay, with all the buildings wiped out? He stayed in a medical tent camp and provided medical help to handfuls of now orphaned children. He raised enough money from friends to spend 17 days there. It took him something like 3 months to get all his papers and medical shots in order, and to find an organization who would take him. It's not like people can just hop on a plane with canned goods and randomly hand them out. That would be chaos. Plus, would you rather spend $1,000 on a flight or $1,000 on providing a few extra hospital beds, or shelter beds, or medical supplies, or $1,000 worth of food? So we all sent our friend money, and he took that money and did good with it. Every little bit counts. There are people actually against doing this for devastated families and pets in Japan? Well, ok, but don't include me in that mindset. A text to the Red Cross costs $10. I think I can live without that extra $10 this week.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 4:07:52 PM)
adapted from The Star Thrower by Loren Eiseley (1907-1977) Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work. One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up. As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean. He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?" The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean." "I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man. To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die." Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!" At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one." This story has appeared all over the web in various forms, usually with no credit given to Mr. Eiseley. Loren Eiseley was a anthropologist who wrote extensively. He was the 'wise man' in the story, and he was walking along a beach after a storm and encountered the fellow throwing the starfish back. Sometimes it is a little girl throwing the starfish into the ocean, sometimes a young man, once even an elder. from this website: http://www.changeeverything.ca/blog/catherine_ludgate/it-makes-difference-one-starfish

Phoenixpower -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 4:18:48 PM)
I didn't know that one sunshinemiss, thank you for sharing. Reminds me a bit about my passion sometimes when I made little improvements for the disabled clients I worked with. Once a social worker had suggested to take a client from me to xyz, a holiday provider mainly for kids. I argued a lot with my manager after that meeting as I completely disagreed with her and thankfully had the back up from another colleague who felt as much against using xyz as holiday for him as I felt. After many debates and me clarifying to my boss that if he wants that client to go to xyz as holiday then he can support him as I won't be doing it. That guy had the desire to go abroad, he was almost 60 by then and I considered that much more appropriate than going to xyz just because it would be so much less hassles to sort this out...at the end we went and whilst many obstacles were in the way in that year as well as the following year for which I had organised the trip, too (once to spain and once to greece) I am glad I made that sure for him. I had countless situations where I was fed up and furious from unneccessary obstacles which had been thrown in the way from different colleagues but I kept reminding myself for whom I am doing it...for the guy (or in that case guys, as we decided to take 2 guys abroad and 2 staff). That at least made the obstacles smaller as it was easier to brush them off, knowing you do a good job for the guy you were putting in that effort. So yes.."for that one" it made a difference....

littlewonder -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:02:47 PM)
so you say that charities and churches don't do anything? That they don't help?? hhhmm...all that food that the church used to deliver to our home when I was a child because we were hungry must have been my imagination. The clothes that were donated to us by local organizations because we had none...again, just my imagination. Why do I give? Why do I help? Why do I do what I can to help others? Because I've been there and I know how it can turn the life around of just one person who really needs it...whether they deserve it or not. I believe that if we can all just help even one person...buy the guy on the corner a hot cup of coffee, bring a smile to his face....it could be that one thing that makes the rest of his day brighter and actually get him off to a better start that day and maybe...just maybe....change his entire life around...from a $1.00 cup of coffee.

Kirata -> RE: Alright, psychology 101 (4/12/2011 5:10:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Termyn8or Now as I said psychology... Just for clarity's sake, yanno, could you please refer to this stuff you post as Termynology? K.

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