Collars?

Collars? (Full Version)

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Asherscorp1 -> Collars? (4/15/2011 5:28:41 PM)
I was just wondering what some other subs experiences with being collared are? Do you have one? Why or why not? What does it represent to you? At what point in your relationship were you "collared"? I'd like to ask especially, if you had to wait a long time to be collared how did you handle that and what were your Dom's reasons for waiting?

MaxsBoy -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 5:52:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Asherscorp1 I was just wondering what some other subs experiences with getting married are? Do you have one? Why or why not? What does it represent to you? At what point in your relationship did you get married? I'd like to ask especially, if you had to wait a long time to get married how did you handle that and what were your spouse's reasons for waiting? Fixed it for you. You see what I did there? Because that's what it is to many people. And just like a couple getting married, the answers are going to be so varied that they probably won't be all that helpful to you. Some people do it almost right away, some wait a long time, some stay together but never do it. It means a lifelong commitment to some, and for others it's easy to toss off and move on to someone else. The reasons for collaring, for waiting, or for not collaring at all are infinite. Decide what your reasons are, find out straight from your Dom about his, and go from there. But I guess you want personal experiences, huh? Max put a collar on me before we actually became a couple, because he knew he wanted to own me - so he took possession of me. That's it. The collar is a sign that I'm his property. He also wears a collar, because - you guessed it - he's mine too. In our case, it's not exactly a weeding ring. It's a sign that we belong to the same pack, and that we're a family. So what's your idea of what a collar represents?

Asherscorp1 -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 6:02:53 PM)
Interesting. I'm not looking for "helpful" really just individual experiences. I see a whole lot of vastly different perceptions on collars/collaring and wanted to just get a feel for what people think of it or what they have done themselves. I used to think everyone did it ... cuz you know, that's what the books all say. ;) But now that I realize it's as personalized and varied as any other practice I wanted some context.

Asherscorp1 -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 6:04:14 PM)
Oh, to answer your question, I'm not entirely sure what I think it represents. I am still analyzing what it would represent for me personally and I have a lot of researching to do to come to any conclusion about what it may mean to anyone else.

Politesub53 -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 6:13:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Asherscorp1 Oh, to answer your question, I'm not entirely sure what I think it represents. I am still analyzing what it would represent for me personally and I have a lot of researching to do to come to any conclusion about what it may mean to anyone else. Surely the only thing that matters is what you and your Dominant think/feel. I was collared for a while. I had known her for two years, and when she collared me it bought a deeper level to our feelings for each other. Maxsboy kind of got it spot in, it felt like a marriage, or at least a commitment. Whatever else, it was a very profound moment for me, even if over time it didnt work out. It isnt something that I would ever jump straight into, although I can understand people doing that in the first flush of a meaningful relationship. To me, it was, and will be next time, quite a profound experience.

avena -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 6:59:44 PM)
I wear D's collar, and have for several months now. For me, I didn't wait for it at all, because I didn't expect it. He surprised me with it one morning after 'breakfast in bed'. I didn't ask for it, I didn't expect it, but I'm very glad I have it. It's a constant reminder to me of his presence in my life. It was a profound moment for me, when he fastened it on, and the last few months have been full of other profound moments. As for what point in our relationship I was collared...well, I guess from one point of view, I was collared very early in the relationship - just three months from our initial 'play date' to try and see if we meshed in this lifestyle. But we've also been friends for over 10 years, which had an impact on things. He definitely wanted his mark on me, however, and the collar is a visible sign to anyone who recognizes the design. And more importantly, as I already said, it's a constant reminder to me, that I'm wanted and treasured for being who I am.

peppermint -> RE: Collars? (4/15/2011 7:14:07 PM)
I waited a year to be collared. I thought it came way too soon, in fact I never wanted to be in the position of being officially collared. He wanted to collar me much sooner. I lost a bet and that is why I am collared. It meant a lot to him. It means a lot to me because it means a lot to him. I never needed the collar to say I was committed to our relationship. As to the "official" collar, I have several that he has purchased over the years. I have an amethyst and silver collar that is more a necklace. I have a wide flat silver band for around my neck. I also have a buckle ring which means I wear what looks like a collar on my finger. For play times I sometimes wear a black and purple suede collar.

CreepyStalker -> RE: Collars? (4/16/2011 4:41:37 PM)
I rather resent that collars have so many connotations. I like collars, they're pretty and I want one for purely superficial aesthetic reasons, but really can't be arsed with all the faff that'd be infrered about me and my relationships if I were to wear one.

Hisprettybaby -> RE: Collars? (4/17/2011 12:37:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Asherscorp1 I was just wondering what some other subs experiences with being collared are? Do you have one? Why or why not? What does it represent to you? Yes, I have a collar. To Daddy & I it represents a real commitment. quote: At what point in your relationship were you "collared"? We were "together" for four months and three days, but we'd known each other for much longer. I was collared last night as a matter of fact, at our local munch, so I'm still pretty excited about it. quote: I'd like to ask especially, if you had to wait a long time to be collared how did you handle that and what were your Dom's reasons for waiting? We did not wait an extraordinarily long time. Some people would say it was too soon. But like I say, we'd known each other for considerably longer than we'd been "a couple" so we knew each other well already. ~Hisprettybaby~

littleone35 -> RE: Collars? (4/19/2011 9:43:51 AM)
Just saw this post so here is my answer. Yes i do wear a collar to others it looks like a pretty necklace but we know what ie means so it is all that matters. We waited for 18 months before he collared me. Why did we wait? We waited until if felt right for us to do it. To us it was just a deeper level to our relationship. The collar he has on my mind and heart though, is much stronger than anything he could put around my neck. Matt's litleone

kinglawell -> RE: Collars? (5/2/2011 8:50:34 AM)
i have not collared my slave / wife to be yet. we have known each other for many years and have gone to the point of getting married. the collar however to us though is the next level. it is a sign that we have become experts on each other and their needs, wants, hopes, and dreams. i know there will be those that say that that is a never ending thing. but i ask the question who knows their partner better the married couple that still keep things from each other (and they do!) and have set limits that wont even be pushed or the couple that has a collar? that have to have trust and fair greater than any married couple or the harm that will be inflicted will be so great in some cases that a life my be ruined or even lost. i can't write from a subs / slaves point of view but as a dom i find that the collar is a sign of the joining of to souls. so to answer the main question asked it means everything to her and to me ( your opion may vary)

Darkhaven80 -> RE: Collars? (5/4/2011 1:50:09 AM)
We use collars for play but don't recognize any formal collaring really. Are engaged and such so that's a commitment in itself that we take seriously, it all blends together into one close relationship.

sunshinemiss -> RE: Collars? (5/4/2011 4:14:41 AM)
There have been a dozen threads on this topic in the last 3 months. You might want to do a search. I don't think much has changed in the last few weeks. best, sunshine

ScottFreakshow -> RE: Collars? (11/10/2011 12:39:03 PM)
I have never been collared before, but Weldon and I were at the toy store a couple of weeks back and we came across a display of collars and he, very carefully and with much deliberance, proceeded to place one on me and observe a) how it looked on me and b) my emotional reaction. Having never really thought about how I felt about such things, my emotional reaction was profound and completely unexpected. It was a moment of fierce intimacy. I blew through a bunch of emotions right off, ranging from love and devotion to fear and confusion, and if you ever heard the expression "the air held it`s breath" you might know what it was like. To my disappointment (and also my relief) we left without it, and to this day I remain uncollared. We chose to put it on hold because, as I said I have never considered it before and we needed to talk about what it means. To each of us individually and as a couple. For the rest of that weekend I was all shaken up inside. Looking back it was sort of amusing, haha. He said he was amazed and happy to have that sort of effect on me.

searching4mysir -> RE: Collars? (11/10/2011 1:40:54 PM)
Yes, I have a collar but it is more of a play collar. I wear it in his presence or when we are apart and I'm craving his touch (in private). My permanent collar will be a wedding ring.

Wolf2Bear -> RE: Collars? (11/10/2011 1:50:13 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Asherscorp1 I was just wondering what some other subs experiences with being collared are? Do you have one? Why or why not? What does it represent to you? At what point in your relationship were you "collared"? I'd like to ask especially, if you had to wait a long time to be collared how did you handle that and what were your Dom's reasons for waiting? At one point when I identified solely as a sub, I did wear a collar shortly after entering in a M/s dynamic with a master who was completely wrong for me and I for him. Plain and simple, it was all exciting to be collared for the first couple of weeks and then when the rose coloured glasses fell off, it became more of a weight around the neck then anything else. Thus when I walked away from him I also removed the chain that was a burden and a painful reminder that I made a poor choice for myself. Whether I'll seek another collar is still in limbo as the need to want to serve another is not a high priority right now. I have my own cub now and yes, I have considered eventually placing my collar on him though that is a possibility that may happen far in the future. I may have him wear one if and when we attend local events which the sole purpose is to make it quite clear that he is mine and not fresh meat for any dominant to play with. I know my local community well enough that they will respect that any sub wearing another's collar is completely off limits to them.

Aileen1968 -> RE: Collars? (11/10/2011 2:05:54 PM)
I was collared about six months into the relationship. I will have been collared for three years this January. It represents complete commitment to each other. I love my collar. It's basically locked on and has only been off while traveling through airport security.

OsideGirl -> RE: Collars? (11/10/2011 2:54:45 PM)
Thread is from April!

HisManegirl -> RE: Collars? (11/20/2011 8:32:41 PM)
Well I haven't been here on the message boards for a while....so just to add my two cents about my being collared. It took my Dom well over a year to give me my Collar. Basically it was because he wanted to be absolutely sure that I enjoyed the Lifestyle and was not just embracing it because I wanted to be with him. We had been together in a vanilla relationship for years and broke up due to my ignorance and fear about the Lifestyle. I have learned a lot in the last year and a half. This last weekend my Dom took me to a Fetish Fair, which I loved. That day he bought my collar and presented me with it that evening. It was a great experience to have that bond between us, knowing that he fully understands that the submissive side of me he always saw previously was enhanced and totally embraced by being in the Lifestyle. The Collar my Dom gave to me stands for total commitment between us, for me to be owned by him, coupled with my gift of submission to him. It stands for trust, faith and communication between us in a very private way few others in our lives understand. I think it stands for a lot more than I even know how to describe. The bottom line is it feels great to wear it and it's very special to me!

slaverachel2Him -> RE: Collars? (11/20/2011 9:49:13 PM)
i have a 24/7 collar that is vanilla looking because of work. It never comes off. i have a black leather collar with steel around it and "D" rings for bondage and when i can wear it without "issues" with family or neighbors. i also have a new steel collar to wear at bedtime chained to the bed. It doesn't compress. This is to avoid accidental choking and carotid compression. Both the black and steel collar lock on. a collar is a step up from a wedding ring to me. My wedding ring means we are married, committed and love each other.That is good. The collar means that were are married, committed, love each other AND that i am His slave with all that entails

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