What's the point of answerphone greetings? (Full Version)

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PeonForHer -> What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 4:15:37 AM)

Does anyone ever listen to the greeting message when they reach someone's answerphone?

Try this as a greeting:

"Hello, this is [phone number]. There's no-one queer to lance your boil at the moment. Please heave a mess after the crone.

I had that I had this on my answerphone for a month. Not a soul noticed. Weird.



GreedyTop -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 4:40:19 AM)

Peon.. darling.. you're odd :)




NocturnalStalker -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 5:23:49 AM)

I leave the George Costanza song on mine. 



ShaharThorne -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 6:32:37 AM)

I had the orgasm on my answering machine.  It made people wondering if I did have a real one....

It did cut down on telemarketers...



windchymes -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 7:39:05 AM)

I laugh at people who still leave explicit instructions for anyone who gets the message...as if we don't know what to do after all these years.

"You have reached 703-xxx-6501. We are sorry we are not here to take your call, but if you will leave your name (pause) a brief message (pause) and the number where you can be reached, we will attempt to return your call as soon as possible. Thank you for calling."

My sister has that on her cell phone, lol.



sunshinemiss -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 8:07:53 AM)

Ha ha... I have a friend who says in her sexiest voice, "You know what to do." it always cracks me up because I was there, in the Verizon office, the day she recorded it. I love that!

My favorite was when I had the song "Fat Bottomed Girls" as my answering machine message and said, "I'm out making the rocking world go round."

I miss Freddie Mercury.



DesFIP -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 9:03:49 AM)

Peon, it may not be that they didn't notice it, but that they didn't want to mention it. Probably for fear of your response. Because that's just weird if not actually creepy.



LadyPact -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 9:10:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Does anyone ever listen to the greeting message when they reach someone's answerphone?

Try this as a greeting:

"Hello, this is [phone number]. There's no-one queer to lance your boil at the moment. Please heave a mess after the crone.

I had that I had this on my answerphone for a month. Not a soul noticed. Weird.


They probably did notice, peon, but figured that they knew you and your odd sense of humor.  [8D]



PeonForHer -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 9:27:17 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Peon, it may not be that they didn't notice it, but that they didn't want to mention it. Probably for fear of your response. Because that's just weird if not actually creepy.


Jeez, if they were delicate enough to find my answerphone message creepy, they'd better avoid actually meeting me. [;)]



PeonForHer -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 9:40:47 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact
They probably did notice, peon, but figured that they knew you and your odd sense of humor.  [8D]



Try it! It's a most intriguing and informative scientific experiment.

Not so odd a sense of humour here, maybe. The whole idea was inspired by Stanley Unwin. There's a real peculiarity with his speaking: the brain thinks it's hearing ordinary English at first - it's only some way into hearing him that you suddenly realise you haven't a clue what he's talking about.

See eg http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=323kQis2zbM or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2tzUFw_onY



LinnaeaBorealis -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 12:31:22 PM)

That's marvelous!! I do so enjoy you Brits & your senses of humour. (Note correct spelling) I agree that rarely do people actually listen to the messages. I get messages for wrong numbers quite often. I say my name in my greeting & they say the name of the person they're leaving the message for. Odd. But I often get people laughing & complimenting me on my greeting, so some must listen to it.

For the record, I don't think your greeting is in the slightest creepy, Peon!



PeonForHer -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 12:49:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LinnaeaBorealis
For the record, I don't think your greeting is in the slightest creepy, Peon!


Thank you, Linnaea. However, your confidence in me is misplaced for I am, in truth, extremely creepy indeed. For instance, at weekends, I like to hide in bushes up in the hills and wait for passing American hikers in order to waylay them and eat their heads with a glass of delicious Chianti.



LinnaeaBorealis -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 12:53:18 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer


quote:

ORIGINAL: LinnaeaBorealis
For the record, I don't think your greeting is in the slightest creepy, Peon!


Thank you, Linnaea. However, your confidence in me is misplaced for I am, in truth, extremely creepy indeed. For instance, at weekends, I like to hide in bushes up in the hills and wait for passing American hikers in order to waylay them and eat their heads with a glass of delicious Chianti.


And this is creepy how??



PeonForHer -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 12:55:03 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LinnaeaBorealis
And this is creepy how??


*Cackle* [:D]



DesFIP -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 1:44:37 PM)

Now that was weird. But I will retract creepy and substitute bizarre.

Instead of heads, why not try headcheese? My teen's newest fad.



juliaoceania -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 2:25:59 PM)

My voice mail greeting got too much notice at one point, so I changed it. It had been overtly sexy, and after my ex and I got more seriously involved I changed it to being more professional sounding.... he noticed.

I do listen to what people say on their voice mail greeting, but only to know what information they want from me. Do they want a call back number? Etc....some people will let you know that they are on vacation, or to call back at a later time, especially professional calls.



juliaoceania -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 2:27:53 PM)

quote:

Ha ha... I have a friend who says in her sexiest voice, "You know what to do." it always cracks me up because I was there, in the Verizon office, the day she recorded it. I love that!


That was mine about 6 years ago, my sister HATED it....lol



Phoenixpower -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 3:14:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
That was mine about 6 years ago, my sister HATED it....lol


Back home I used to have on it on a few occassions the text "Phoenixpower here....(wait a moment)...oh, I am sorry I am not at home, please leave a message and I will get back to you."

Got quite a few pissy friends who had fallen into it and didn't realise straight away that itw as the answering maschine instead of me...over here I dont speak on it and just use the standardised message as over here I receive more unwanted phonecalls than back home, because of which I prefer to just use the standardised text with a different voice.



littlewonder -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 3:47:38 PM)

when I was married and we had a landline, me and my husband would make weird, quirkly messages all the time, scream into the machine or sing a song. Our navy friends would play along and leave weird messages for us. His family would laugh and tell us to knock it off and my family refused to leave messages lol.

I no longer have a landline so no weird messages and I don't have any personal message on my cell phone..just the phone company's recorded message. The less I have to deal with people the happier I am these days.




SorceressJ -> RE: What's the point of answerphone greetings? (4/25/2011 4:09:12 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder
The less I have to deal with people the happier I am these days.


AMEN to this! We don't have a landline and don't want one. Husband is getting a cellphone but that's because his boss wants him to have one and is paying for it, and it's mostly just so said boss can get ahold of him better. We hate phones.



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