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aromanholiday -> RE: Being Polite? (5/3/2011 1:06:24 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Fightdirecto
I always try to be polite when I write to a sub the first time. However, some subs have told me that the terms "polite" and "Dom" mutually contradict each other. Too many subs and too many Dominants have a mental picture of what a Dominant should look like or act like or say or write and someone who writes in a polite and gentlemanly way does not fit their mental picture of a "real" Dominant.
I doubt the people who read this message board do this, but I was just curious so I'll ask. Have any dominants here been influenced by the submissives who think you are not real if you are polite and started writing "rougher" emails to submissives as a result? This seems a damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't situation, because other submissives won't like the impolite approach. Of course, you can always not write submissives, but assuming that is not an option you want to take at this time, which group do you tailor your approach to, and why?
quote:
Many subs lack politeness as well. If you are not interested in a Dominant that writes in response to your profile, how much effort is involved in the four word answer, "Thanks but no thanks"? Instead they either do not respond at all or they respond with an attack on some aspect of the Dominant that they do not like (my most common response of this type is "Old men like you are GROSS!")
I've also noticed that there are autoreplies. If they are anything like the autoreplies on other personal-ad sites they will be nice and polite. And they are quicker to use than typing a rude message. People--all types of people, no group is excluded--when online, seem to experience lack of inhibition, low impulse control, and give in to childish urges to vent rage at strangers when interacting socially. It's almost as if something on our screens makes us drunk, as these are all common symptoms of drinking. But I suspect what draws this out is just the headiness of anonymity mixing with a native lack of intelligence, judgement, and foresight.
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