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RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 7:21:47 PM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline 		Nope. I mean cigarettes. I gave up drugs about 10 years ago. I seem to be an old hand at quitting addictions, though it doesn't get any easier with practice. The first one was the hardest, this one just took time and a different approach.

Still taking the WIN though.

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3801
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 7:50:14 PM   
FelineFae


Posts: 7756
Joined: 1/23/2009
From: i do wander everywhere...
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Bstardsbitch1

Ah but being sneaky I was watching and have stolen it right back.


If I may pry, who is the loveliness in the pic above?


Lol, it's the same as the girl in my avatar, just without all the photo-editing play. i was working on a temporary art project.

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(in reply to Bstardsbitch1)
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RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 8:05:12 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself


quote:

ORIGINAL: PheonixRose

poor lovethyself whats going on???


Just way too many things going on right now, combined with some anxiety about an upcoming event that is bringing up issues I thought I had dealt with, and I'm housesitting for my parents, so I can't seem to find anything because it's at the wrong house (no matter what house I'm at, it seems). Earlier I just mentally hit the proverbial wall and was struggling with it all.

It'll all eventually sort itself out. I'll go to the various events, enjoy myself where I can, and abstain where I should. I'll hopefully have people show up at the crafting munch I'm hosting (still not 100% sure how I got myself into that one), and try not to kill anyone at the wedding I'm being forced to go to on Thursday (to save a friend that's the best man from being hit on by the brides' friends). I think the biggest thing is that I'm usually shy, somewhat insecure, and I'm going to events by myself (since I'm single nowadays) where I want to actually make new friends. I'm horrible at breaking the ice and starting conversations.

I also quit smoking a week ago, and that's not helping anything right now. lol. I think I need to go to the gym at some point and work the heavy bag. That might relax me a bit.



sounds like a lot wow...

i know the feeling of things not quiet going as planned sorry for the singleness ATM and i know the being brave and going out in the world on own and such thats why im glad that i still after having to be split for almost 4 years am back with my Master and pet.

sucks having to play the date for a friend especially when there isnt an interest in the person or something positive can come out for self.

have fun alone at parents house and hopefully you can find and manage to retrieve all that is needed soon.

E2A: sorry for the proverbial brick wall hope all gets better soon and am here if needed.

< Message edited by PheonixRose -- 10/29/2013 8:15:30 PM >

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3803
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 8:39:39 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself

Nope. I mean cigarettes. I gave up drugs about 10 years ago. I seem to be an old hand at quitting addictions, though it doesn't get any easier with practice. The first one was the hardest, this one just took time and a different approach.

Still taking the WIN though.


well, I hope you nail this one to the wall and splatter it with a scattergun, LOL

all I can say that might be of help is refrain from the temptation to call any NPO or gov't organized helpline for cig-disavowal . for the most part, they suck emu-egg sized shitbricks.

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3804
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 8:49:18 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline 		lol i havnt really given up smoking ive just decided the healther route for around my UM is E cigs. They work for the most part.

I win :D

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3805
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 8:50:31 PM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PheonixRose

sounds like a lot wow...

i know the feeling of things not quiet going as planned sorry for the singleness ATM and i know the being brave and going out in the world on own and such thats why im glad that i still after having to be split for almost 4 years am back with my Master and pet.

sucks having to play the date for a friend especially when there isnt an interest in the person or something positive can come out for self.

have fun alone at parents house and hopefully you can find and manage to retrieve all that is needed soon.

E2A: sorry for the proverbial brick wall hope all gets better soon and am here if needed.



Haha, the date for a friend thing is a been-there-done-that friend. Love him to bits, don't really want to go there again intimately, ever..... 5 years was enough. It's more that I have little to no respect for the couple getting married (and it usually takes a lot to get me to that point with someone), so my tongue will be sore by the end of it. Oh, and it's a Hallowe'en wedding, with the wedding party in costume, and the reception is at a night club. *sigh* It could have been a cool idea, but considering who it is.....

Parents' house is good in that I'm not dealing with housemates, but bad in that I'm dealing with other things. I'm getting the piano tuned this weekend, so that may help a bit (it really needs it). But I'm missing a bunch of piano books. I've tried here, my place, the cottage, and I don't know where else they would be. I'm sort of a control freak when it comes to knowing exactly where things are stored (even if it looks like a disaster zone, I can still find things in it). Not being able to find things is driving me nuts!

Thanks for the offer of support. I've got someone to talk to about my current anxiety (courtesy of LP), but I may one day take you up on your offer. As I start to get into the local community irl and on fet, I'm realizing that the anonymity (sp?) of the internet lessens the more you actually connect with people in the real world. Starting a discussion here about first time play party jitters is different from fet, where most of my "friends" are people I've at least met irl. Most of my local community don't really frequent the forums here. Plus, I sort of view all of CM as my internet munch.

You are a good heart Rose. Blessed be.



(in reply to PheonixRose)
Profile   Post #: 3806
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:06:19 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline 		speaking of which, the author of Maus, Spiegleman himself, smokes e-cigs to get him off the real ones.

have you considered those?

I myself went cold turkey after many attempts both of hippiecrap and corporate medical crap origin. but if the e-cigs had been there, I imagine they'd have worked.

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3807
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:16:11 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself

Haha, the date for a friend thing is a been-there-done-that friend. Love him to bits, don't really want to go there again intimately, ever..... 5 years was enough. It's more that I have little to no respect for the couple getting married (and it usually takes a lot to get me to that point with someone), so my tongue will be sore by the end of it. Oh, and it's a Hallowe'en wedding, with the wedding party in costume, and the reception is at a night club. *sigh* It could have been a cool idea, but considering who it is.....

Parents' house is good in that I'm not dealing with housemates, but bad in that I'm dealing with other things. I'm getting the piano tuned this weekend, so that may help a bit (it really needs it). But I'm missing a bunch of piano books. I've tried here, my place, the cottage, and I don't know where else they would be. I'm sort of a control freak when it comes to knowing exactly where things are stored (even if it looks like a disaster zone, I can still find things in it). Not being able to find things is driving me nuts!

Thanks for the offer of support. I've got someone to talk to about my current anxiety (courtesy of LP), but I may one day take you up on your offer. As I start to get into the local community irl and on fet, I'm realizing that the anonymity (sp?) of the internet lessens the more you actually connect with people in the real world. Starting a discussion here about first time play party jitters is different from fet, where most of my "friends" are people I've at least met irl. Most of my local community don't really frequent the forums here. Plus, I sort of view all of CM as my internet munch.

You are a good heart Rose. Blessed be.


ah that sounds fun and like he can keep you busy and distracted from the factor of disliking the marrying couple...

i can understand the whole needing to know where stuff is. im anal like that too if i cant find it ill turn everything in to more of a mess than needed to find it and still after cleaning up the mess lose the object yet again.... aint it funny how things happen like that.

not a problem i like to be an ear for my acquaintances and hopeful friends here. LP is an awesome woman glad you have her ear to vent and such to.

thank you i try to be good hearted as long as people dont try to shred it and such. Blessed be to you too.


oh the wonders of what else to do i am in the midst of doing one class work that im passing with flying colors for hating and such APA format im doing very good.....

Bordum what fun LOL

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3808
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:18:41 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NoBimbosAllowed

speaking of which, the author of Maus, Spiegleman himself, smokes e-cigs to get him off the real ones.

have you considered those?

I myself went cold turkey after many attempts both of hippiecrap and corporate medical crap origin. but if the e-cigs had been there, I imagine they'd have worked.



ecigs are cool they make it so i dont want real ones as bad even though i could bum here and there from my mom and grandfather.... but one problem they smoke reds and im a menthol girl LOL... oh the wonders of Master, pet and I sharing and such. my ecig is from Blu and its awesome. Love the flavors am currently smoking cherry.

Cherry ecig for the win :D

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3809
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:21:57 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline 		I was also partial to the menths, doll.

Bennie and hedge,
Alpines,
Kool(yuck)
St. Moritz (my fave)

but the worst menths I ever had were in fact Marb Green. WORST. It was like smoking astroturf.

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to PheonixRose)
Profile   Post #: 3810
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:22:13 PM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NoBimbosAllowed

speaking of which, the author of Maus, Spiegleman himself, smokes e-cigs to get him off the real ones.

have you considered those?



Have one. Just got it at the trade show the weekend before quitting. It was sort of the impetus for taking that final step. The juice has 0 nic, so I'm not sure how much that equates to cold turkey. I did that route with drugs. Quit job, moved home, slept most of the day and night. Bad times. Lessons learned.

With this one, it's the first real attempt to quit. All the others were attempts to cull, with the eventual goal of quitting. When I finally stopped, I had already gotten it to only at home, after work, and with a 3 smoke max. After 15 years of smoking every day of work (and usually the only reason for taking a break), I had already stopped that part, as well as in the car. Now, if I need that distraction/oral fixation/breathing exersise, I will pull on the e-cig. There's no nicotein so getting readicted is low. But as a stress reliever, it forces the same slow breathing pattern as smoking, thereby calming any high emotion responses (like sobbing, crying, hyper-ventilating). That was the biggest hinderance to my culling efforts.

So far, it's working. But I've proven in the past that I'm stronger than my addictions. If I can kill a meth addiction, I can beat this too. It's just going to take time and effort to get to the point of it not being in the front of my mind.
quote:



< Message edited by lovethyself -- 10/29/2013 9:25:44 PM >

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3811
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:25:48 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself



So far, it's working. But I've proven in the past that I'm stronger than my addictions. If I can kill a meth addiction, I can beat this too.




case closed! you take the win, meth and nicotine take the LOSS!

btw, doing PHYSICAL painting with layered techiniques, or sculpting with clay, helps "put you into the other zone where the addiction has no voice". and cannot clamour at you.

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3812
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:31:35 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NoBimbosAllowed

I was also partial to the menths, doll.

Bennie and hedge,
Alpines,
Kool(yuck)
St. Moritz (my fave)

but the worst menths I ever had were in fact Marb Green. WORST. It was like smoking astroturf.


well i started with USA GOLD to Camel no. 9 to no. 9 menthe to Kool to Pall Mall then tried pyramids (OOBER YUCK) then Mavericks (not too bad).

i even went to djarum black (cloves) best in the cigar papers the new ones arnt so hot.

and last brand TIME ( so so)

im partial to kool, camel, or pall mall with the occasional Marlboro Smooth or NXT to spoil myself. Marlboro skylines SUCK they are like smoking Thin flat nasty air.

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3813
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:36:17 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline 		I would have LOVED to do a social smoke with you, Pheonix baby!

/cross-my-heart-icon

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to PheonixRose)
Profile   Post #: 3814
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:36:20 PM   
lovethyself


Posts: 1818
Joined: 11/4/2012
Status: offline 		I need more tools to do 3d block carving. I haven't found time to go shopping (sad, I know) for new tools.

As a side project, I've started working on a period gavel and block for a local SPA group. Mainly to try my hand at something new. lol.

Almost all of my creative projects are 2D, as I have relatively little spacial awareness around anything curved. I don't deal in life drawing (or anything remotely relating to that). I do well in controlled chaos (like knotwork) or abstract concepts. Reality escapes me when relating to my own artwork.

I want to start working on that with the carving, but I have to spend a bit more money on sharp toys before that becomes reality. lol. I'm going to eventually scare some dominant personality by talking about my sharps and how much I love playing with them. lol.

NBA, if you have suggestions that work for my mediums (ie. wood, metal, paper, etc.) I'm all ears. I don't do well with paints and clay.

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3815
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:37:23 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: lovethyself

If I can kill a meth addiction, I can beat this too.



way to go girl glad to hear your away from the evil drugs. Been there done that learned that i gotta stay way from the type of ppl that do those things. been clean from pot for about a year now since i got away from an ex BF that did it just hoping that UM doesnt follow in my footsteps would hate to see her go through half the SH!T ive been through.

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3816
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:38:08 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline 		/scanning memory banks for LTS, lol

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to lovethyself)
Profile   Post #: 3817
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:38:41 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline 		LOL well what can i say ive been through and done alot for being only 25.

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to NoBimbosAllowed)
Profile   Post #: 3818
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:43:17 PM   
PheonixRose


Posts: 748
Joined: 9/19/2012
Status: offline 		well im here just gotta work on...

•Describe a local business that you are loyal to and explain why.
•Describe the person that you deal with at the business. What traits does this person have that made an impression?

for customer relations and servicing

_____________________________

Blessed Be,
Pheonix Rose

SLAVE OF CÆRGOWEN OWNED BY CHAOSFORGE

COLLARED JAN. 3RD & HAND FASTED JAN. 7TH OF 2009

"Only in a collar can a woman be truly free"
~Tribesmen of Gor pg 75

(in reply to PheonixRose)
Profile   Post #: 3819
RE: The Last One to Post, WINs Part II - 10/29/2013 9:47:01 PM   
NoBimbosAllowed


Posts: 1450
Joined: 9/19/2013
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: PheonixRose

LOL well what can i say ive been through and done alot for being only 25.


you have a lot more than that going for ya, dahhhhlin'. feel great about yourself tonight.

I'll answer your Q's in a a few after I use my art acumen to help LTS save her lung tissue (lord knows I lost a fair bit of my own...)

_____________________________

It's all about the curvature of the female azzzzzzzzzzz, meaning Niki Minaj and Serena Williams and Kate Cerebrano, NEVER Kylie Minogue! Wooden Spoons and Ottoman scenes from Story of O, baby dolls!

(in reply to PheonixRose)
Profile   Post #: 3820
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