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allspicey -> RE: submit to express? (5/13/2006 12:54:20 AM)
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A very interesting question. I showed it to Master who said....hmmm...a very interesting question. lol!
When I came to serve Master I made it very clear that love was not something I was interested in between us. The four pillars of my submission are: Respect, Honesty, Trust, Duty. Duty takes over when I'm flat exhausted or angry because of something that seems completely not right or communication breaks down...I still serve and I still submit because I can't be and do anything else and because I made that committment to do so.
The biggest buttons one can push with me are power and control, with the highest form of this being Ownership. Love is way down at the bottom of the pile. I do love Master but that was a long and hard battle he fought with me because love is not the strongest of glue and sometimes interferes with the deeper Master/slave dynamics and I didn't want it interfering with our relationship! [:D] It can make a Master soft when he needs to be hard, giving when he needs to be taking. I always care about the people I serve, I feel extraordinarily bonded with and tender toward them. However, this isn't romantic love nor do I wish it to be.
I asked Master if love and affection are part of our play time or his dominance of me. He said "Sometimes". It depends on what he is wanting. When he plays with me, it is now usually part of our play time but not always (for instance, in a heavy S&M session, it is much more about him fulfilling his sadist side and very little about love between us). With outside parties, love is certainly not part of it and even affection isn't necessary although it may be there. He has played with people on a strictly physical and non emotional level or on a deeper, more affectionate level.
So...is it necessary? Not at all for me. With Master it's turned out to be a good all around relationship but when I was seeking strictly D/s, I was definitely not looking for love. Care, yes, love, no.
spicey
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