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Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:12:01 PM

fastlane

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How long should one tolerate a particular command?
In other words, put your hands forward, palms up...don't move until I come back. How long would you wait?
In the Secretary, she peed herself without moving, could you be so serving and submissive? Just curious. I'm going to Pee as ?? waits with palms up...Tee hee hee, Thanks, Kevin

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RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:23:42 PM

ArchangelMichael

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From: New Orleans, LA
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I think that depends on the individual and the level of devotion in the relationship. Some people have abandonment issues, so those people would not be the ones you'd want to do something like that to. I'm not sure how long I could wait, but it would depend on how much I really trusted the person.

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"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rouge

(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 2

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:26:12 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: fastlane

How long should one tolerate a particular command?
In other words, put your hands forward, palms up...don't move until I come back. How long would you wait?
In the Secretary, she peed herself without moving, could you be so serving and submissive? Just curious. I'm going to Pee as ?? waits with palms up...Tee hee hee, Thanks, Kevin

I might get blasted for this but I don't personally find "The Secretary" to be a good model for a BDSM relationship at all.

Too many personal and psychological problems on both sides for my tastes.

But in general, I'd expect a good submissive to try to maintain a position for as long as they could; I'd expect a good dominant to not be stupid enough to make them wait too long and draw such public attention to them.

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(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 3

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:28:43 PM

cuddleheart50

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From: Kentucky
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There would have to be alot of trust there. And, I do have abandonment issues, but I would wait until I could wait no longer.

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Post #: 4

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:34:38 PM

TemptingNviceSub

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Actually I could hold my bladder longer than I could the position you described..so I guess until my arms gave out...Tempting

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Post #: 5

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:36:21 PM

Lashra

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I wouldn't make someone wait so long that they peed on themselves. I just don't see the purpose in that at all. Although Im sure some would find it quite amusing

~Lashra

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Post #: 6

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:46:51 PM

ownedgirlie

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He told me to stand there awhile. But he fell asleep. He didn't intend to sleep, but he did. When he awoke in the morning, I was still standing. If he puts forth a command, I will follow it through until he tells me not to. There have been other instances also. In the event of the standing all night situation, he said in the morning that I could have come up with any number of reasons to have just gone to bed, but he was amazed and extremely pleased I did not.

I don't tolerate commands, I obey them.

(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 7

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:54:10 PM

Evanesce

Posts: 2325
Joined: 9/14/2005
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quote:

How long should one tolerate a particular command?
In other words, put your hands forward, palms up...don't move until I come back. How long would you wait?

Until exhaustion made it impossible to remain alert enough to hold the position, at which point I'd be asleep. I don't often get such commands, but when I do, I obey them.

And for the record... Master and I both found the scene with Lee sitting at the desk very hot, for the level of devotion she displayed.

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(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 8

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 7:59:03 PM

perverseangelic

Posts: 2625
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From: Davis, Ca
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I might get blasted for this but I don't personally find "The Secretary" to be a good model for a BDSM relationship at all.

Too many personal and psychological problems on both sides for my tastes.

But in general, I'd expect a good submissive to try to maintain a position for as long as they could; I'd expect a good dominant to not be stupid enough to make them wait too long and draw such public attention to them.

Strongly aggreed.

I would remain there as long as I am phsycially capable and it is safe to do so. I -would- move if there was something that I had to do. For example, if the stove caught on fire, or one of my kittycats got themself in a dangerous position.

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Post #: 9

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 8:01:47 PM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo
But in general, I'd expect a good submissive to try to maintain a position for as long as they could; I'd expect a good dominant to not be stupid enough to make them wait too long and draw such public attention to them.

Where did public attention come into the mix here? I must have missed the part where the question had anything to do with being in public.

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Post #: 10

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 8:03:34 PM

LadyHugs

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Dear fastlane, Ladies and Gentlemen;

The scene as you present, which the hands forward and palms out, would be a real test of strength and endurance.

Some individuals given the command, there will be no question they will do their dead level best in doing so; even if they voided on themselves while maintaining that position. The mental will that is internalized as well as the fatique of the external. But, they do not do this for their own rewards but, to please the Master and submit to quality of submission.

If I left a person for a long period of time, I would want another to monitor them. It is nice to have a report back from another. Some who cheat at commands get caught, especially if they think it is silly and has no merit. To me, this is not a question of merit or purpose but, a test or training in obedience. But, everything must be applied with good judgment as not to put a person into a situation meant to fail, as this would not be the purpose in my mind.

Because I prefer older slaves, they do have physical issues. So, I give a command and an option should they reach the limit of tolerance, physically.

Respectfully submitted,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to fastlane)

Post #: 11

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 8:15:01 PM

ArchangelMichael

Posts: 243
Joined: 8/21/2004
From: New Orleans, LA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

I might get blasted for this but I don't personally find "The Secretary" to be a good model for a BDSM relationship at all.

Too many personal and psychological problems on both sides for my tastes.

But in general, I'd expect a good submissive to try to maintain a position for as long as they could; I'd expect a good dominant to not be stupid enough to make them wait too long and draw such public attention to them.

Actually, I agree with you regarding Secretary. I like the movie and it can give non-lifestylers a better idea as to what we are about, especially in that our lifestyle is about consent and mutual happiness; however I also disagree with quite a few things in the movie. First, people can't be cured of self mutilation just because someone tells them to stop. Second, I do agree that the time she spent waiting was a bit far-fetched; however, as an artistic device to show her devotion to him, it worked. You just can't take the movie at face value. These people's psychological problems will not be resolved through a BDSM relationship alone.

_____________________________

"Open up your mind; Let your fantasies unwind." -The Phantom, Phantom of the Opera

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rouge

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 12

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 8:18:58 PM

feastie

Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
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I once was late to my Dominant's home. He needed something from the store, but chose to leave me at his home rather than taking me with him. He made me remove my clothing and placed a hard, wooden chair facing the door. The door had a nine lite window in it, which he usually covered during our sessions. He left the covering off the window. He opened my legs, positioning my feet as he wanted them, he placed my hands at my sides, grasping the seat of the chair. He told me not to move and he left, leaving the door unlocked, which was his habit. Of course, that also meant that his friends were apt to wander in at any time they wished.

I'm not sure how long he was gone, I'm sure it wasn't very long, but I didn't budge. I don't know if I could have stayed as long as the woman in Secretary (a movie I hated), but I think it really depends on one's level of commitment and devotion.

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Post #: 13

RE: Toleration - 5/14/2006 8:22:25 PM

ArchangelMichael

Posts: 243
Joined: 8/21/2004
From: New Orleans, LA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: cuddleheart50

There would have to be alot of trust there. And, I do have abandonment issues, but I would wait until I could wait no longer.

Heh, of course the question was...how long would it be before you could wait no longer? Is Lee's waiting time possible, or is that simply an unrealistic expectation. Yes, trust is the major factor. There are also other factors such as what if the person who told you to wait has an accident? Are you going to wait when you could be calling them to see if they are okay?

I honestly think that if you want to test someone's devotion and/or their patience and make them wait, you should give them a maximum time. Like, "I want you to wait for me for 2 hours. If you do not hear from me by this time assume something happened." And then you can show up in an hour or an hour and a half. You can do this activity several times, showing up at variable intervals so that the submissive doesn't know when you will come back, but they know that you won't be any longer than a concrete time. IMO, if the submissive can't handle the maximum time frame, then that says something about either their level of patience, their devotion, or both.

< Message edited by ArchangelMichael -- 5/14/2006 8:25:50 PM >

_____________________________

"Open up your mind; Let your fantasies unwind." -The Phantom, Phantom of the Opera

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Toulouse-Lautrec, Moulin Rouge

(in reply to cuddleheart50)

Post #: 14

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 2:28:06 AM

RavenMuse

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Whilst it is a fun little movie in some respects, there are several things where I agree it isn't a good model for D/s. The submission seeming to come from her emotional baggage and being to some extent bracetted in the same 'box' as self-harm. Him being insecure and somewhat neurotic... and don't get me started on the brattish behaviour in order to get 'punished'.

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And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Owner of metalmiss

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Post #: 15

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 3:35:36 AM

Dustyn

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Joined: 4/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

and don't get me started on the brattish behaviour in order to get 'punished'.

Gee, can we say topping from the bottom?

I agree that it was a cute lil movie, but all told, just another fine example of giving people preconcieved ideas about how the things we do works... rather it had never been made at all...

- Dustyn

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Can you be more amusing?

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Post #: 16

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 3:41:25 AM

Sab

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Joined: 5/2/2006
From: Canada
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Dustyn

quote:

ORIGINAL: RavenMuse

and don't get me started on the brattish behaviour in order to get 'punished'.

Gee, can we say topping from the bottom?

I agree that it was a cute lil movie, but all told, just another fine example of giving people preconcieved ideas about how the things we do works... rather it had never been made at all...

- Dustyn

Agreed!

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God blessed it and it brought me to her.

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Post #: 17

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 3:44:14 AM

feastie

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Hey ya'll, let's stick to the topic of the OP and not hijack this thread to yet another discussion of the move Secretary.

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Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

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Post #: 18

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 3:58:47 AM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
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I think Archangel's comment is on target. Being an "older" sub myself, I have some physical limitations. I simply cannot kneel for long periods of time without causing some problems. My fomer dom and I had some problems with just this issue until I followed an order of his and ended up at the doctor's and in bed for a period of time. I would follow them until I couldn't...until I knew that it would cause serious problems.

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Post #: 19

RE: Toleration - 5/15/2006 3:59:37 AM

Littlepita

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Joined: 10/6/2005
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It would be really hard for me to remain in a position like that for some undetermined amount of time. I would want to obey my Master, but at the same time I have this strong impulse not to do things that are uncomfortable or what I deem as stupid. I can guarantee that I would be wiggling around a lot and would probably relax the pose from time to time. If it got to the point of really hurting or something came up I would just get up and tell him why and deal with the consequences as he saw fit.

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“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” – Anais Nin

(in reply to feastie)

Post #: 20

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