RE: loosers in life (Full Version)

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HeatherMcLeather -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 7:10:45 PM)

quote:

Ive been waiting for an opportunity to use THIS... thanks for providing it.
LMAO!! I love it! And Hanners will love it even more!! I'm so saving that link!



sexyred1 -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 7:29:09 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

quote:

that not only closes the doors to newcomers but also opens the door for people to say whatever they like in a place you so love
That is simply untrue. I'm new here, and not one door has been anything but wide open to me. Hanners is new, and even though she's, well, Hanners. No doors have been closed to her either.

If these people will accept her, then they are by definition very accepting. If Hanners can be part of this place and you can't, I think the answer lies with you somehow. I mean she's the poster child for "In your face, unpopular opinions being very rudely shoved down your throat" postings, and yet somehow....


See, here's the thing, and this is for the OP really. It does not matter if you are accepted here, does it? I mean, really, how much does being on this site affect someone. We are a collection of random pixels, unless we have met or spoken to each other.

I do understand the perceived camaraderie of being in a like minded group, albeit an online group. And sure, I met people from here and elsewhere from online as have others in real life.

It is fun to express yourself online; jeez, bloggers are getting tons of money for ranting and raving.

But for the OP to post something like this, and others like him, is just ridiculous. If you need validation from an online community that you cannot find in yourself, you need a better GPS.



HeatherMcLeather -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 7:50:21 PM)

quote:

If you need validation from an online community that you cannot find in yourself, you need a better GPS.
It's not so much validation, as acceptance. Think about it, you'll take the time to answer my questions, correct me when I've got something wrong, confirm things when I've got them right. How much of that would you be willing to do in person with an 18 year old girl who blushes all the time, says "like" every third sentence, and giggles, stutters and stammers with nervousness when trying to speak seriously about something?

In real life you'd all probably just think I was an annoyingly immature, silly little teenager, but here I'm an earnest newbie wanting to learn. I'm both, but here I get taken seriously, out there, you probably wouldn't take the time. I'm comfortable talking to a woman of your age and experience on here, I can address you as an equal, but in person I'd be so intimidated I'd be tongue-tied and fighting the urge to just burst into tears and run away.

I'd be terrified to speak with most of you face-to-face, but I can do it here, I can joke and laugh, and flirt, and learn. And yes, sometimes even teach, because my words and ideas are listened to here, because they are presented in the same package as everybody else's. So an online "community" can be a very important thing, depending on where one is in life and what you're looking for from that community.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 8:06:06 PM)

I would listen to you in real life, Heather :)



myotherself -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 9:30:28 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1




But for the OP to post something like this, and others like him, is just ridiculous. If you need validation from an online community that you cannot find in yourself, you need a better GP.


fixed it....[:D]



heartcream -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 9:47:27 PM)

I am a tighter.



LillyBoPeep -> RE: tighters in life (6/16/2011 9:56:03 PM)

i have found that people who have no reality in their offline lives

do anything they can to antagonize others

they make silly posts and assume the stance of moral indignation on a bloody internet forum they PERCEIVE as needing a savior

cause the internet is SERWIOUS BIZNESS!

lmao-naisse

the people who put time and effort into making up goony threads like this are laughable

but in the end fakes tend to show their true colors

(for the record, this post has nothing to do with heartcream, who is a perfectly pleasant, innocuous person -- i just liked the word "tighters." =p)



sexyred1 -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 9:57:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

quote:

If you need validation from an online community that you cannot find in yourself, you need a better GPS.
It's not so much validation, as acceptance. Think about it, you'll take the time to answer my questions, correct me when I've got something wrong, confirm things when I've got them right. How much of that would you be willing to do in person with an 18 year old girl who blushes all the time, says "like" every third sentence, and giggles, stutters and stammers with nervousness when trying to speak seriously about something?

In real life you'd all probably just think I was an annoyingly immature, silly little teenager, but here I'm an earnest newbie wanting to learn. I'm both, but here I get taken seriously, out there, you probably wouldn't take the time. I'm comfortable talking to a woman of your age and experience on here, I can address you as an equal, but in person I'd be so intimidated I'd be tongue-tied and fighting the urge to just burst into tears and run away.

I'd be terrified to speak with most of you face-to-face, but I can do it here, I can joke and laugh, and flirt, and learn. And yes, sometimes even teach, because my words and ideas are listened to here, because they are presented in the same package as everybody else's. So an online "community" can be a very important thing, depending on where one is in life and what you're looking for from that community.


Hi Heather, first off, I was not referring to you in my comment; more so the OP and others who seem to whine alot. You do not do that at all.

In fact, I quite admire you and the way you communicate; I always enjoy your posts and Hannah's as well. I doubt that I would find you as annoying as you deem yourself.

You should never be terrified to speak to people; no one is better than you and many are worse. Always remember that.

I don't mind anyone seeking information, to learn, to teach or to share. What I was saying was that the OP was talking about this being some sort of clique of acceptance and if you are not part of that clique, then you are not accepted. THAT was what I meant about needing to be validated.

And to answer your question, I would absolutely speak to you in real life. I have a number of younger female friends and they come to me for advice because they know I did stupid things when I was younger and I keep learning myself.

I do take you seriously; not because of your age but because of the content you produce. I take people for what they say, not the age.



DavidLee44UK -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 11:15:55 PM)

red i dont need validation from anybody

i come to a forum to feel i can contribute not to be called a liar etc at every turn and to me the people who do are the ones who need validation from peers etc

but not my prob as wont be coming here much if at all

but if you have to watch what you say do and type 247

then its not a forum

like it or dont theres a lot empire building here

and aren't we all looking for validation from somone from you look nice to that classic line does my bum look good in this

but from post 2 when i was told if i didn't know so and so who was a member of the london scene i was a fake

and the bloke lived across pond lol

im human i have flaws im not perfect god i hope im not perfect

and being bullied isnt the actions of the bully its the perceived bullying by the person that matters

i came here from day 1 to have fun relax not fight my corner from day 1

and if some think thats what a forum is about then dont they need validation to




LadyPact -> RE: loosers in life (6/16/2011 11:39:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather
It's not so much validation, as acceptance. Think about it, you'll take the time to answer my questions, correct me when I've got something wrong, confirm things when I've got them right. How much of that would you be willing to do in person with an 18 year old girl who blushes all the time, says "like" every third sentence, and giggles, stutters and stammers with nervousness when trying to speak seriously about something?

In real life you'd all probably just think I was an annoyingly immature, silly little teenager, but here I'm an earnest newbie wanting to learn. I'm both, but here I get taken seriously, out there, you probably wouldn't take the time. I'm comfortable talking to a woman of your age and experience on here, I can address you as an equal, but in person I'd be so intimidated I'd be tongue-tied and fighting the urge to just burst into tears and run away.

I'd be terrified to speak with most of you face-to-face, but I can do it here, I can joke and laugh, and flirt, and learn. And yes, sometimes even teach, because my words and ideas are listened to here, because they are presented in the same package as everybody else's. So an online "community" can be a very important thing, depending on where one is in life and what you're looking for from that community.

Heather, I know you said this to Red, but I want you to know that you don't have to feel this way.  There are lots of us out in the world who would have plenty of fun talking with you someplace other than a computer screen.  There was a strong presence of the younger set at the last munch group that I was associated with helping to form.  The gals that I was out having fun with were your age or a couple of years older. 

I get that you're shy, but you don't have to be intimidated.  There are plenty of folks in the real world that would who would have a great time talking to you.



VaguelyCurious -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 1:44:58 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

I'm comfortable talking to a woman of your age and experience on here, I can address you as an equal, but in person I'd be so intimidated I'd be tongue-tied and fighting the urge to just burst into tears and run away.


See, one thing I've heard a few people from here say is that the boards have helped them learn to be assertive in other areas of life. So you might find that changing as time goes on. [:)]

(And SternSkipper: this is me, taken in a mirror with my little snaps camera and then colour-fucked a little. .dark picked me out of a crowded room from the full-face version of it, so it must be reasonably representative.)

(And yay! Cronies! [:D])



sunshinemiss -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 2:34:33 AM)

TO the OP:
If you're gonna insult someone, at least spell the insult correctly.

solo digo.
sunshine



sunshinemiss -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 3:03:24 AM)

Sunny
Quote of the Day
goes to
Icarys
[sm=book.gif]
for
So how much wood
does an Alaskan beaver
put up for the winter, anyway.



LadyConstanze -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 3:15:59 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: DavidLee44UK

red i dont need validation from anybody

i come to a forum to feel i can contribute not to be called a liar etc at every turn and to me the people who do are the ones who need validation from peers etc

but not my prob as wont be coming here much if at all

but if you have to watch what you say do and type 247

then its not a forum

like it or dont theres a lot empire building here

and aren't we all looking for validation from somone from you look nice to that classic line does my bum look good in this

but from post 2 when i was told if i didn't know so and so who was a member of the london scene i was a fake

and the bloke lived across pond lol

im human i have flaws im not perfect god i hope im not perfect

and being bullied isnt the actions of the bully its the perceived bullying by the person that matters

i came here from day 1 to have fun relax not fight my corner from day 1

and if some think thats what a forum is about then dont they need validation to





If you lie and you get caught out on it, then you ARE a liar and you have to put up with being known as one and being called one. It's simple, stop lying!

What do you contribute? You aren't interested in discussions, anybody who disagrees with you, you just play the victim card.

If you came to relax then apparently your way of relaxation is attacking others and lying, because that seems to be what you do most.

Several of us tried to engage you in conversation to give you a fresh start when you posted, what was your reaction? Acting like a toddler and throwing another childish tantrum trying to play the victim. Sorry but you not only have ZERO social skills, you're also very offensive. Why do you think people react like they do? It's something YOU DO!



LaTigresse -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 3:26:37 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather
It's not so much validation, as acceptance. Think about it, you'll take the time to answer my questions, correct me when I've got something wrong, confirm things when I've got them right. How much of that would you be willing to do in person with an 18 year old girl who blushes all the time, says "like" every third sentence, and giggles, stutters and stammers with nervousness when trying to speak seriously about something?

In real life you'd all probably just think I was an annoyingly immature, silly little teenager, but here I'm an earnest newbie wanting to learn. I'm both, but here I get taken seriously, out there, you probably wouldn't take the time. I'm comfortable talking to a woman of your age and experience on here, I can address you as an equal, but in person I'd be so intimidated I'd be tongue-tied and fighting the urge to just burst into tears and run away.

I'd be terrified to speak with most of you face-to-face, but I can do it here, I can joke and laugh, and flirt, and learn. And yes, sometimes even teach, because my words and ideas are listened to here, because they are presented in the same package as everybody else's. So an online "community" can be a very important thing, depending on where one is in life and what you're looking for from that community.

Heather, I know you said this to Red, but I want you to know that you don't have to feel this way.  There are lots of us out in the world who would have plenty of fun talking with you someplace other than a computer screen.  There was a strong presence of the younger set at the last munch group that I was associated with helping to form.  The gals that I was out having fun with were your age or a couple of years older. 

I get that you're shy, but you don't have to be intimidated.  There are plenty of folks in the real world that would who would have a great time talking to you.



Absolutely!!!

I have ALWAYS enjoyed the company of young people, both personally and professionally. My kids friends, some of them still call me 'Mom' or 'Mom Two'. I think they liked that they could talk to me about anything and not get treated like a stupid kid. Some of my daughter's school friends still keep in touch with me as much as they do her.

My sister-in-law thinks I am evil because I remain friends with her son's ex-girl friend. Hey, the girl knows she can come to me for advice without me ripping her head off and shitting down her throat. She needs that. It doesn't hurt me any to be nice to her. My sister-in-law needs to pull her broom stick out of her ass. She reminds me of an older, less attractive version of Drita.

Young people are fun, they have less preconceived notions of how things 'should be'.

A lot of us 'old folks' would never condescend based simply upon age. Some would, but I don't think they are worth worrying about.



LadyConstanze -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 4:13:17 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse



Young people are fun, they have less preconceived notions of how things 'should be'.





Reminds me of the neighbour's kid yesterday, super nice boy and 9 years old, we became friends when his ball was often in our yard and he kept ringing and asking if he could get it, I introduced him to the dogs and told him the door is open and he can just get it but why he doesn't play in the playground of the Close we live in, there's a bit of communal property that's a private playground for kids. He explained that he did but one of the women chased him out and said since his mom is renting her house, he doesn't have a right to use the playground, it's for "owners only" - complete and utter rubbish, everybody owning property in that close is paying a bit for that piece of ground that has been turned into a playground, so the landlord of the renter as well. There are lots of public parks and playgrounds around but the kid would have to cross some main roads. So I took him to the playground and told the woman that since I don't have kids but own, I'm quite happy if little Ben plays there in lieu of the kids that I don't have and surely as a mother she wouldn't want to risk a child crossing main roads to go to another playground.

Yesterday I had a little chat with the boy and he said "You know that lady who doesn't like me? I think she's not very happy because she always looks so angry and unhappy, it makes her ugly!" I almost wet myself, because she was standing on the edge of her garden pruning some plants, well within earshot (boy couldn't see her as it was behind him) and she had a look as if somebody just dropped a bucket of cold water over her. Kids can be very refreshing and I didn't explain to Ben why I just had to give him some chocolates. The stuff kids come out with, maybe we could notice them too if we wouldn't be so caught up in well, how things should be and that one should not notice certain things...



juliaoceania -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 7:49:17 AM)

quote:

like it or dont theres a lot empire building here


What do you mean by "empire building"? Do you think collarchat is going to take over the internet?

quote:

but if you have to watch what you say do and type 247

then its not a forum


I watch where I am when I try to have a conversation with people. For example, I watch what I say around my family, I watch what I say at work, and I have a few anthropology forums I contribute to, and I had better watch what I say there. I am very used to watching what I say, and even here I know there are many things I cannot say, and I am way okay with that.

quote:

and aren't we all looking for validation from somone from you look nice to that classic line does my bum look good in this


Do you have a mouse in your pocket? You cannot talk for other people...


quote:

and being bullied isnt the actions of the bully its the perceived bullying by the person that matters

i came here from day 1 to have fun relax not fight my corner from day 1

and if some think thats what a forum is about then dont they need validation to




I would tend to agree with you, you need to relax. I posted on your googlechrome thread, and I saw you get hyper defensive, state that LC had called you "stoopid" just because she had different observations than you do, and basically you overreacted. Basically, what you are saying in this post and on that thread, is that you should say whatever you want, but others should watch what they say because they might offend you.

I think that is a little controlling, David, at least that is how I see it. Perhaps you should accept that other people have a right to a different opinion than you have, and the world will not crumble.



GreedyTop -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 8:48:02 AM)

how DARE you make sense, Julia?



LillyBoPeep -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 8:55:06 AM)

julia is so bloody cool =p 



MasterG2kTR -> RE: loosers in life (6/17/2011 9:15:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: DavidLee44UK
but not my prob as wont be coming here much if at all


You should really do your trolling in the politics forum....you don't need to keep promises there....

we've heard this one too many times already to believe it.



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