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RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 9:31:57 AM   
MasterSlaveLA


Posts: 3991
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SpiritedRadiance

Personally I really really hate the fact people go well they have to be fake they cant possibly be real slaves yada yada.



While you may not like the "fake" allegation, you may also not be aware of the frequency of the scams on sites like these... hence the reason for CM's WARNINGS.  Example ---> http://www.collarme.com/personals/scammers.htm

Said warnings exist for a reason.


_____________________________

It's only kinky the first time!!!

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 11:34:26 AM   
sexisubi


Posts: 373
Joined: 11/23/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:


whoow whooow... read above sweetheart, i completely love stay at home moms. i dont even know you, why would i be talking about you?


I was using myself as an example, I did not take it personal.




are you saying you were pregnant at 18 or 19?


_____________________________

bound by love,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIvvaqUdDm8

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 3:46:14 PM   
maiden4meldin


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/3/2005
Status: offline 		Gonna catch it for this but here is my opinion entirely. 

Stay at home slave/wife/mother, uhm yeah been there did that, loved every minute of it, hated seeing it disappear.
Stay at home slave, I loved being at home with my family, focused on my husband, I crave doing that again.  When I first became a mother I was only 17 at the time, married at 22, and didn't even consider being a career woman.  Years and years went by, the divorce happened, and guess what, I really hate working for a living.
I think that a lot of the problems with society in general today are due to the fact that women are in the work force in general.  Think about it, when our grandmothers stayed home and grandpa worked, his single income was enough to raise a family, put the kids through university.  When our mothers went to work, suddenly almost overnight a change happened, now we are expected to have two income families, send our children off to daycare, and look after the needs of our men.  Its exhausting enough just to do one of those but all three, and the guilt over daycare raising our children, honestly, mom's should stay home. 

Back to the original question, can a young person have what it takes to be a slave at home, or is she/he just a mooch.  I was young and devoted to my man, I stayed at home, I had always known that was all I would ever want to do, We as a team decided to sacrifice the material things, and made it happen.  Do I think a young person can know what it truly means to be owned as a slave, probably not, but thats between the slave and the dominant to decide right?

Sorry if I offended anyone, just my opinion in general
maiden

(in reply to MasterSlaveLA)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 4:00:06 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		Wow, I had refrained from posting this before, meldin, but since you expressed your opinion, I feel like I should.  I was that working mother you described, and I caught a lot of flack (how could you do that to your UMs, daycare is awful, you are scarring them for life, etc.)  Whatever.  My UMs are both college graduates, hard working, and quite well adjusted, thank you.   I have also built a very successful and lucrative career, and was married for 20 years.  When I divorced, I was more than able to support myself.  As far as I am concerned, if a man or woman can't raise kids, have a job, and see to their relationship, than they are just lazy and probably mooches too.  And a couple of the same women who heaped disapproval on me applied to be my secretary the last time the job was open.  Made me laugh, and laugh and laugh.  Needless to say, they weren't qualified for the job. 
The idea that women stayed home and men were the ones that worked outside of the home back in the day is pretty bogus too.  That was true, possibly, of that world war 2 generation.  But my grand parents, and great grand parents were farmers and ranchers.  Needless to say, the women worked in the family business too.
So, thanks for your opinion Meldin, sorry you don't like your job.  Too bad about that divorce.  I also feel terrible that I created problems for you by validating my education and not sponging off someone else.

_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 4:18:13 PM   
maiden4meldin


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/3/2005
Status: offline 		We all have to live our dreams, mine was to be a stay at home wife, mother, caregiver, and it wasn't mooching, or in any way easy to do.  Can you believe that while I was at home as all of those things, that the government census actually listed me as a "non person" under their little clip board.  Trust me, making cookies, baking cakes, keeping house, wiping tears, bandaging bruises, hospital visits for stitches, home schooling, cooking, and the countless other errands that needed doing, ya, I was living a mooches life.

Congrats for using that education, woohoo go hard girl.  I do think your valid, and glad your kids got life handled.  Oh and ya thanks for invalidating my life so succinctly.
Are you with the government census bureau too?

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 4:21:47 PM   
lockedaway


Posts: 1720
Joined: 3/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

We all have to live our dreams, mine was to be a stay at home wife, mother, caregiver, and it wasn't mooching, or in any way easy to do.  Can you believe that while I was at home as all of those things, that the government census actually listed me as a "non person" under their little clip board.  Trust me, making cookies, baking cakes, keeping house, wiping tears, bandaging bruises, hospital visits for stitches, home schooling, cooking, and the countless other errands that needed doing, ya, I was living a mooches life.

Congrats for using that education, woohoo go hard girl.  I do think your valid, and glad your kids got life handled.  Oh and ya thanks for invalidating my life so succinctly.
Are you with the government census bureau too?



<lockedaway slips in to write something pithy or witty or sarcastic...reads the thread....backs out quietly....sprints to his car!>

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 5:04:41 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		Nope, just a hard working private business person who believed in providing for her children. Sorry you feel invalidated, but if it makes you feel better, feel free to blame "a lot of the problems in society, in general " on women like me.

_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to lockedaway)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/27/2011 6:35:23 PM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Iamsemisweet

I was that working mother you described, and I caught a lot of flack (how could you do that to your UMs, daycare is awful, you are scarring them for life, etc.)  Whatever.  My UMs are both college graduates, hard working, and quite well adjusted, thank you. 
Actually, it's been shown that children who have daycare are better socialized and have an easier time dealing with going to school.

I'm actually even worse than you. I'm college educated, have a career and chose not to have children. <gasp>


_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to Iamsemisweet)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 1:20:50 AM   
maiden4meldin


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/3/2005
Status: offline 		Fyi, I don't hate my job, I hate working.  While married as a "mooch" we ran several home based businesses, along with one retail store as owner operators.  I was also in charge of financing, along with day to day operations of the retail store, and the rental properties.  I hate working because it takes so much time away from the things that I truly valued, like raising my children, who btw came to our store and did their home schooling, and devoting myself to my husband.  My son is angry because his father checked out, and moved to the philipines, we have two other daughters that are married with growing families, and these two strong women have chosen to "mooch" off their husbands and stay at home with their babies, putting their "careers" on hold to do so, a choice between them and their husbands.  Two other daughters that one is a single parent by choice.  And the other chooses to work.  One son that is in university at the moment deciding to rule the world of music producing.  So if I offended you career ladies, too bad.  We all have opinions, thats why this is a message board right.

maiden

(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 7:26:41 AM   
graceadieu


Posts: 1518
Joined: 3/20/2008
From: Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

I think that a lot of the problems with society in general today are due to the fact that women are in the work force in general.  Think about it, when our grandmothers stayed home and grandpa worked, his single income was enough to raise a family, put the kids through university.  When our mothers went to work, suddenly almost overnight a change happened, now we are expected to have two income families, send our children off to daycare, and look after the needs of our men. 


The idea that in our grandparent's time the mothers all stayed home and only the men worked is a myth. They were just much more limited in their career choices (teacher, maid, seamstress etc). And even if they didn't work, often times a single male income wasn't enough, and he'd have to work two or three jobs to pay the bills or they'd be direly poor. And these days, most women want to be in the workforce. Personally, I'd hate to be a stay-at-home mom, both because I like working and because I saw how unfulfilled my own mother was when she stayed at home.

So it's great that you want to stay home and raise your kids - for some people that really is the right choice - but please don't try to push that choice onto everybody else. :/

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 8:00:37 AM   
Ishtarr


Posts: 1130
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

We all have to live our dreams, mine was to be a stay at home wife, mother, caregiver, and it wasn't mooching, or in any way easy to do.  Can you believe that while I was at home as all of those things, that the government census actually listed me as a "non person" under their little clip board.  Trust me, making cookies, baking cakes, keeping house, wiping tears, bandaging bruises, hospital visits for stitches, home schooling, cooking, and the countless other errands that needed doing, ya, I was living a mooches life.



As one stay-at-home-mother to the other... REALLY?

I hate it when stay at home parents use the whole "I work too because I clean, bake and make dinner" excuse.
You do realize that working mothers do that too, right?

My own mother did all the things you listed here AND worked 50-60 work week.
What do you think? That all those things suddenly disappear just because somebody works? Working people deal with exactly the same stuff you do plus hold a job.

Like you, I prefer to stay at home and take care of the house. Like you, I have the LUXERY of having a husband and other sources of income that provide enough so that I can indulge myself in that luxury.
Unlike you, I don't for a second believe that what I do around here is fully on par with somebody who holds a full-time job, simple because of the fact that most of what I do extra that working parents don't have time for isn't necessary, but are my hobbies: home decorating, gardening, baking and so on.
I get to do all the things my mother wishes she had more time to do, calling it "work" as if it's on par with what she did would have been an insult to her.

Considering that you seem to think that what you did is the equivalent to what your husband does, it's no wonder he's checked out. I know that type of relationship: the stay-at-home-wife who thinks she does more than the working partner just because her supposed hours never end, and nags her husband after a long day at work to do his "fair share". I've seen that a bunch of times, and I'm never surprised if the working partner ends up bailing out because he can't handle the stress anymore.

_____________________________


Du blutest für mein Seelenheil
Ein kleiner Schnitt und du wirst geil
Egal, erlaubt ist, was gefällt

Ich tu' dir weh.
Tut mir nicht Leid!
Das tut dir gut.
Hör wie es schreit!

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 8:30:31 AM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline
quote:

I think that a lot of the problems with society in general today are due to the fact that women are in the work force in general.  Think about it, when our grandmothers stayed home and grandpa worked, his single income was enough to raise a family, put the kids through university.  When our mothers went to work, suddenly almost overnight a change happened, now we are expected to have two income families, send our children off to daycare, and look after the needs of our men. 


2 minute economics lesson for you:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTzMqm2TwgE&feature=share

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 9:14:24 AM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

Years and years went by, the divorce happened, and guess what, I really hate working for a living.
I think that a lot of the problems with society in general today are due to the fact that women are in the work force in general.  Think about it, when our grandmothers stayed home and grandpa worked, his single income was enough to raise a family, put the kids through university.  When our mothers went to work, suddenly almost overnight a change happened, now we are expected to have two income families, send our children off to daycare, and look after the needs of our men.  Its exhausting enough just to do one of those but all three, and the guilt over daycare raising our children, honestly, mom's should stay home. 



You must be kidding, right?

Let's take this one at at time:

You hate working for a living? Too bad. Join the rest of the universe. If you hate your job, find a more fulfilling one or deal with it and surround the rest of your life with things that you like.

You think that problems in our society are due to women in the work force?? WTF? I don't know too many couple where they do not need, from a financial point of view, two incomes. When our mothers and grandmothers were home and our fathers and grandfathers worked, the standard of living costs were different.

In 2011 that is not a real possibility for most folks. Of course stay at home Moms work hard, but seriously, most people I personally know, have to work, kids or not, single Moms or married.

And I would prefer children in daycare than learning the type of lessons you seem to be promoting; especially if you have daughters.

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 9:29:19 AM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		First of all, don't act so wounded meldin. You posted a comment that you meant to be provocative, so don't be surprised that it worked. And yes, everyone is entitled to their opinion, I just question how well thought out your is.
Sounds like you were quite the baby factory. If you and your ex were able to send that many kids to college or otherwise set them up for success in life, then good for you. If not, then my opinion is that people who knocked out kids, without the ability of providing for their future, are the "source of many of the problems in society in general.".
Didn't sound like you ever had much on the ball, but the women who really crack me up are the ones who put their career on hold, and expect to start right up where they left off when they return to work Yes, I agree it is their and their husband's decision for them to stay home, but it is pretty stupid to think they are just going to return to the work force, with great fanfare, when they happen to feel like it. Sorry toots, it just doesn't work that way.
So your husband took off, did he? Well, I have dated a lot of men who's exes were stay at home moms. These guys tend to use phrases like "I felt taken advantage of" and "I felt like I was just the bank" when referring to their ex wives. Wonder how your ex describes you.
Of course, all of this is just my opinion. Good luck finding someone willing to support your dead ass for the rest of your life. Hopefully you have some sort of retirement set aside, because I sure don't want to support you. I tend to think that "many of the problems in society in general" are from too many mooches thinking the rest of us owe them a living.

quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

Fyi, I don't hate my job, I hate working.  While married as a "mooch" we ran several home based businesses, along with one retail store as owner operators.  I was also in charge of financing, along with day to day operations of the retail store, and the rental properties.  I hate working because it takes so much time away from the things that I truly valued, like raising my children, who btw came to our store and did their home schooling, and devoting myself to my husband.  My son is angry because his father checked out, and moved to the philipines, we have two other daughters that are married with growing families, and these two strong women have chosen to "mooch" off their husbands and stay at home with their babies, putting their "careers" on hold to do so, a choice between them and their husbands.  Two other daughters that one is a single parent by choice.  And the other chooses to work.  One son that is in university at the moment deciding to rule the world of music producing.  So if I offended you career ladies, too bad.  We all have opinions, thats why this is a message board right.

maiden

quote:

disappear


_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 9:50:55 AM   
myotherself


Posts: 7157
Joined: 3/9/2006
From: The cold bit of the UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OsideGirl


I'm actually even worse than you. I'm college educated, have a career and chose not to have children. <gasp>




Yeah, me too

And even more selfishly, I chose to become a teacher so that I can help educate the next generation or two of young people so that they can be the strong, independent, well-educated men AND WOMEN of the future.

I'm a bad, bad person

_____________________________

There's nowt so queer as folk


(in reply to OsideGirl)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 10:36:13 AM   
errantgeek


Posts: 156
Joined: 6/20/2011
Status: offline 		As someone who's switch but mostly sub...I can say that if I'm on the lookout for a submissive girl, I think it's a nice filter.

For one thing, let's face it: at 18-19, very few people know what they truly want from life, and the vast majority of people that age aren't terribly wise. Without exploring one's options, they never will rectify either of those problems. Get a job, get in college, and see what you want to do...if you happen to be kinky, you can still fulfill that urge without making a rash lifestyle choice. The first thing I would not want from a young sub is to make a stupid decision that limits her options in life. In short, D/s should never be subtractive.

Second: young, dumb, and being full of cum for room and board is no way to go through life, kid. Admitting the willingness to do that is even dumber, because you're admitting from the onset that you're not a very ethical person and likely to bolt for a more lucrative offer. That's not D/s, that's prostitution as others have said. Now, like all things if that is the person's kink and wants the illusion of that in the context of a D/s relationship okay, but barring that...no way.

Third: I don't want doormats, and I certainly don't want someone who lacks ambition or the desire to be their own person. Go out, work, go to school, spend time with friends, then come home, strip down, call me Master and fetch me a cup of coffee (ha). Improve yourself as a person, first and foremost. I have no problem with someone who wants to be a stay-at-home sub, slave, whatever, as long as they have the life experience and self-actualization to know that is what they want.

Long story short, girls who say things like that indicate they probably haven't thought their cunning plan all the way through and it's fairly transparent. So...no thanks.

(in reply to myotherself)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 11:35:44 AM   
maiden4meldin


Posts: 4
Joined: 3/3/2005
Status: offline 		Wow, just wow.  personal attacks on my whole life, personal insight into why the marriage ended.  pretty judgemental over the simple opinion that women's lib in general is a bane on our society.  I was not permitted to work, unless it was what he insisted I do.  I was not a whiney housewife who got bored and moved on to something else.  I was and am a capable woman, who supports herself and her mighty brood.  Illness ended the relationship.  Abuse of the youngest child ended the relationship.  Not once did I ever feel like a woman who sought the "pay cheque dom".  Nor do I seek a "pay cheque dom" now.  I am not a freeloader, I own my own home, paid off through years of hard work, not through child support, or alimony, because that wasn't my reality.  Therapy that he insisted on, told me to leave.  The police who came to my home, warned me, and I quote "If you do not get out of this relationship, you will someday be front page news, woman and children found dead, husband suicide beside them"  So did I leave, ya, ok, shoot me.  My ex didn't know how to turn on a stove, do a load of laundry, change a diaper or in any way shape or form manage anything within our household.  He left for the philipines for his own reasons, leaving his children behind, and maintains no relationship with anyone at all.  His choice, not mine, not theirs.  The people that I know, the women and men that know me personally, also tend to believe that women's liberation in general sucks.  It is a shame that a person can't state an opinion without being personally attacked for it.  Attack the opinion, not the person thanks.

maiden

(in reply to errantgeek)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 12:02:57 PM   
kalikshama


Posts: 14805
Joined: 8/8/2010
Status: offline 		1. I support stay-at-home mothers

2. I do NOT support women who make baby after baby with the type of man who inspire the police to do this:
quote:

The police who came to my home, warned me, and I quote "If you do not get out of this relationship, you will someday be front page news, woman and children found dead, husband suicide beside them"

What, you had no clue before you made baby # 5?

3. I do not support whine-fests

4. You are of course entitled to your opinion "women's lib in general is a bane on our society;" do you believe we'd be better off without these changes?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminism#Societal_impact

The feminist movement has effected change in Western society, including women's suffrage; in education; in gender neutrality in English; job pay more nearly equal to men's; the right to initiate divorce proceedings; the reproductive rights of women to make individual decisions on pregnancy (including access to contraceptives and abortion); and the right to enter into contracts and own property.[88][89] Feminists have struggled to protect women and girls from domestic violence, sexual harassment, and sexual assault,[25][90][91] emphasizing the grounds as women's rights, rather than as men's traditional interests in families' safety for reproductive purposes. On economic matters, feminists have advocated for workplace rights, including maternity leave, and against other forms of gender-specific discrimination against women.[88][89][92] They have achieved some protections and societal changes through sharing experiences, developing theory, and campaigning for rights.[90][93][94][95][96]

< Message edited by kalikshama -- 6/28/2011 12:03:20 PM >

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 12:03:24 PM   
Iamsemisweet


Posts: 3651
Joined: 4/9/2011
From: The Great Northwest, USA
Status: offline 		Ok. Your opinion is stupid too. I think I did say that.
In any case, it sounds like your husband is a horrible person. It also sounds like you made some horrible choices and limited your possibilities by getting knocked up at 17. So no, I don't respect your opinion on "women's lib" in general. You are hardly the poster child for being a traditional house wife.
In short, your opinion that career women are the source of society's and i guess your problems is not very credible and is pretty laughable, regardless of how your friends might feel. Sorry if you consider that a personal attack, but I am certainly happy not to be in your situation. Made different choices. Read your first post and ask yourself who is being judgmental.

_____________________________

Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
The Cat: Oh, you can't help that. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.
Alice: How do you know I'm mad?
The Cat: You must be. Or you wouldn't have come here.

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Slave or Mooch? - 6/28/2011 12:48:10 PM   
Ishtarr


Posts: 1130
Joined: 4/30/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: maiden4meldin

Wow, just wow.  personal attacks on my whole life, personal insight into why the marriage ended.  pretty judgemental over the simple opinion that women's lib in general is a bane on our society. 


If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen.

You where down right insulting to working mothers everywhere, basically implying that they don't have personal values because they dare to let their kids go to daycare of school and that you are somehow a superior mother to them because you chose to have 5, FIVE kids with a man that the police apparently considered to be a mortal threat to those same children and you, a man who refused to ALLOW you to work (which means you did not at ALL chose to be a stay-at-home-mom but instead where a prisoner in your own house).
Wake up and smell the sunshine sweetie, before you criticize other mothers out there for giving their kids the best life they can, how about considering why you married such an imbecile of a man who, according to you, can't even do a load of laundry or make a meal.
Do you expect a medal for letting your kids grow up with a father that can't take care of them and apparently could have killed them if he where in the mood, just because you where FORCED to stay home and devote your whole life to this man?

I'm grateful for being able to be a stay-at-home mother and housewife, especially seeing that it gives me the time to further my own education and peruse other interests of mine. I generally also feel that it is of benefit to -especially very young- children to have a parent who can devote an almost unlimited amount of time to them; however, I have MUCH more respect for working mothers than for somebody who lets her abusive incompetent husband dictate her life and endanger her kids.

Hell, when I came to the conclusion that your husband left you because you where overbearing and didn't realize his efforts, I was giving you the benefit of the doubt and saw your story in the best possible light... but apparently... the truth is MUCH MUCH worse.

_____________________________


Du blutest für mein Seelenheil
Ein kleiner Schnitt und du wirst geil
Egal, erlaubt ist, was gefällt

Ich tu' dir weh.
Tut mir nicht Leid!
Das tut dir gut.
Hör wie es schreit!

(in reply to maiden4meldin)
Profile   Post #: 60
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