RE: Pain versus humiliation (Full Version)

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Damacis -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/6/2011 10:44:14 AM)

Humiliation is much more profound -- but not as a means of discipline. On the contrary I find it immensely stimulating.



coookie -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/6/2011 12:33:36 PM)

humiliation is a form of pain imo, it is just more like a mental pain. When used as a punishment i very much detest humiliation used because it throws me way off kilter and i become very unsure of my relationship where as physical pain almost validates that togetherness. I am not sure that i am explaining myself well here.



paulmcuk -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/6/2011 12:50:09 PM)

Tough one. Couldn't choose between them really. I don't like pain but I love that it demonstrates the Domme's superiority because she is in a position to inflict something I dislike on me. Humiliation plays on my inate sense of inferiority to the Domme and brings it to new heights (or lows).



UberBrat -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/13/2011 2:54:04 PM)

For me, either humiliation or pain would work as a punishment, but not so much because of the pain or humiliation itself, more because of the fact that I knew it was a punishment.
On the rare ocassions when I have done something wrong, knowing that he is angry or annoyed with me, or even worse disappointed, is a worse punishment than anything else that could happen; and he knows that.



UniqueRaven -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/13/2011 3:38:19 PM)

Pain. I tend to be hard to humiliate.

I'm not a masochist, so intense pain is not fun for me (I do love spankings and biting and things like that).

But for me the ultimate punishment is - his disappointment. [X(]



TheShrew -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/13/2011 4:52:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFreeMan
Which has a more profound effect upon you? Pain or humiliation?
Pain. I have fairly thick skin and try hard not to allow people to provoke me to a point where they govern the emotion I feel.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AFreeMan
Which do you think is a more effective form of discipline?
Depends on the sub/slave.
If your sub/slave is a maso .. pain may not be the best tool of discipline.
If your sub/slave is into hum .. hum may not be the best tool of discipline.
If your sub/slave is into both .. neither may be the best tool of discipline.
If you have a sensitive sub/slave .. a look, or a whisper may be all it takes to break them.



experiment2 -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/13/2011 6:53:34 PM)

for me humiliation leave a greater impression. i get resentful and angry at being belittled. i know it sounds illogical but being one who enjoys pain at times it can almost seem like a reward.

as far as discipline goes i think humiliation leave more of an impression.

as a submissive i craved praise and compliments from my Mistress. pleasing Her was what i strived for and any humiliation was the total opposite of what i tried to show her.



lupineEleven -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/16/2011 9:56:38 PM)

For me, pain is a heckovalot better than humiliation, purely because most forms of humiliation have extremely detrimental affects on my psyche. Pain I enjoy, to a certain point.

For discipline, humiliation would honestly ring out to me like a child getting angry and calling someone else names because they didn't get what they wanted. If Master tried to humiliate me as discipline or punishment for a wrongdoing I would not learn from it, I would instead be deeply hurt, lash out in anger at his childish behavior, and there would be a great many things to repair before things could return to normal - IF they could ever return to normal. Having dealt with abusive relationships that kept me controlled by playing on my self-worth (ie humiliating me), trying to use humiliating techniques to control me would at this point in my life, make me quite impossible to control, if not violent.

What Master uses for discipline is lectures... I hate lectures, they make me feel bad, they're boring, and he points out truths that I would rather overlook in them. After the lecture we discuss what needs to be done to fix the issue, and then, yes, Master will use pain (we have this 'special' cane that is the bad-girl stick just for these occasions) to mark the end of the punishment and we move on. The pain at the end is like a breath of fresh air, or a shot of caffeine, or something shocking basically, that feels good and bad at the same time, bad because it's as a punishment thus that mindset is there, but also relaxing because of the fact that I am a little bit of a painslut.

As for PLAY discipline or Funishment... humiliation of some forms are fun (slut, whore, harlot, etc... embarrassing but not degrading scenarios are fun), but overall much of it is still detrimental to me and as such is usually avoided. We're more into a bit of pain and a lot of force.



MrSprocket -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/16/2011 10:09:25 PM)

I tend to be incapable of being humiliated and belittled. I tend to laugh and belittle right back.

Pain on the other hand is a different story. Pain is my preference for the sole purpose of becoming stronger. My arousal is an acceptable byproduct.



Aynne88 -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/16/2011 10:29:54 PM)

I think for some of us humiliation has a different meaning and a different outcome. I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times and for me, some humiliation has a very centering effect. It can also be hot as hell to be pushed into that shameful erotic zone of doing something I hate yet winding up craving it and being a wet begging mess by the end of it. Humiliation done right takes a very clever touch, and can take me further into a mental headspace than any pain can ever do. I'm pretty hard to mentally fuck with so when it's accomplished correctly I love being humiliated. Yum. 



sunshinemiss -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/17/2011 4:28:45 AM)

quote:

I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times


Get outta town!



Aynne88 -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/17/2011 5:18:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sunshinemiss

quote:

I tend to get haughty and can be quite a bitch at times


Get outta town!



lol...cheeky little thing aren't ya? [;)]!



sunshinemiss -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/17/2011 5:41:28 AM)

quote:


lol...cheeky little thing aren't ya? !


... says the queen of understatement.  Haughty, indeed!



myotherself -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/17/2011 6:31:52 AM)

If we've been apart for a while, sometimes I forget exactly what position I hold in the relationship. He uses humiliation to remind me of the position I begged for, and for that I'm always grateful.

If I'm in a pissy mood and don't mind my tongue, he'll also use humiliation to remind me to shut up and behave, lol

Punishments always involve pain though. We do talk about the issues, We discuss the problem, and I will explain to him why I was wrong and apologise, and then I will take the punishment. I prefer it this way because otherwise I will brood on the issue and I find I'm still brooding and wondering if I'm forgiven long after he's put the problem behind him. This way we put a very definite full stop to the problem and I find I can move on much easier.



stoni23 -> RE: Pain versus humiliation (8/17/2011 6:32:17 AM)

I've never been humiliated as a form of punishment. I've been ordered to sing silly songs in front of strangers (kink-minded, but strangers nonetheless), cross dress in public, have painted toenails in public, have a silly green sparkly kid's dragon glue on tattoo thing on the back of my neck in public, carry around a silly little strawberry doll, but never humiliated as a form of discipline.

It's always been pain for me, which has been affective. Although, come to think of it, I never really did anything to deserve the discipline to begin with lol.



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