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RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/14/2011 10:09:05 PM

BBWDOM4MARRIAGE

Posts: 8
Joined: 7/11/2011
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Tony, ideal is relative - for an ideal profile, it would show he is what I'm seeking, while being truthful. However, what would make it a good profile to me, regardless of whether he was what I wanted (or I was what he wanted), is if it was friendly, rather than bragging; if it displayed personality, rather than a rich fantasy life; and, if he seemed honest, instead of telling me he was.

I really can't stand the profiles that say things like "Of course, a submissive must never wear clothes, so Mistress would force me to be nude at all times", or, things like that. It's crap! There is no "of course" about those things, until you narrow it down to a particular Mistress and she is telling you so. But, it's fine to say that you enjoy being nude, in some way where it does not sound like you are attempting to force your potential owner into doing things just as you think they ought to be done.

(in reply to PainObjectForUse)

Post #: 21

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 2:14:27 AM

PainObjectForUse

Posts: 38
Joined: 7/10/2011
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BBWDOM4MARRIAGE

Tony, ideal is relative - for an ideal profile, it would show he is what I'm seeking, while being truthful. However, what would make it a good profile to me, regardless of whether he was what I wanted (or I was what he wanted), is if it was friendly, rather than bragging; if it displayed personality, rather than a rich fantasy life; and, if he seemed honest, instead of telling me he was.

I really can't stand the profiles that say things like "Of course, a submissive must never wear clothes, so Mistress would force me to be nude at all times", or, things like that. It's crap! There is no "of course" about those things, until you narrow it down to a particular Mistress and she is telling you so. But, it's fine to say that you enjoy being nude, in some way where it does not sound like you are attempting to force your potential owner into doing things just as you think they ought to be done.

I definitely agree: subtlety, intelligence, humility are traits to be cultivated. And wet dream profiles are definitely a turn off and unsophisticated IMHO.

Tony

_____________________________

"I may be submissive, but I am not your slave" by me.

- Yes , I suffer from the syndrome of over-generalization.

It's not so much what I write, but the way I write it.

(in reply to BBWDOM4MARRIAGE)

Post #: 22

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 4:40:19 AM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

This is the second or third time recently that I've heard this drivel about how posting a lot here somehow = bad.

Let me comment on that. This place is like a party. You walk in and nobody knows you. If your posts show intelligence, insight and ideally a sense of humor, you'll be accepted just fine. If your posts piss everyone off, you won't be.

The people who don't think posting here is a good idea generally make posts that fall into one of the following categories:

1. Bitches here don't fucking answer my messages. They're rude!
2. I iz Master. Applicants line up to my left.
3. Why do submissives think they have the right to refuse the collar of a random Dom?
4. I am supreme Mistress. All men take out your wallets and line up.
5. Discuss my specific fantasy in excruciating detail.
6. My Dom/me (even better, my submissive) tells me that there is some rule book and that X must always happen. Is that true?
7. My Dom lies to me, cheats on me, loses his temper and screams at me, and spends more time with his unknowing wife than me. How do I become more submissive so this doesn't happen?
8. There are too many fakes on collarme. I demand that the site take action NOW!
9. I have the opportunity to buy a slave who I have never met for $5000. Could anything go wrong?

In other words, it wasn't the posts. It was the people behind them.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 23

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 6:40:06 AM

theGuideGoddess

Posts: 135
Joined: 11/8/2006
Status: offline

@LadyConstanze: Actually I was not referring to you at all, but it seems I hit a tender spot. Do you consider yourself rude? IF you actually knew me you might have known a little better. In real life I have been called both a bitch and an angel and it is true, I can be both. I don't imagine myself a deity.....I have discovered that there will always be those who are far greater and those who are lesser than myself. It has proven beneficial to not compare myself but to just be myself. I was not comparing myself to others when I posted above; I was stating a generalized observation.

I did not choose my name, another did. I often offer understanding and kindness when some are finding it evasive. In real life I work with women who are in abused situations and attempt to help them to find their way up and out. I also have a award winning business working with women where I guide them in their choices.....for 38 years now. I started studying psychology in 1976: to better my ability to guide as well. Additionally I have been studying law for four years. So yes, guiding is a suitable name no matter how distasteful you may find it.

@ LadyPact: In all honesty I missed his tag line.....so maybe I am like the op and miss things from time to time. If I watched 5 hours of TV a week that would be a lot for me. Perhaps it isn't a matter of organizational skills, but a matter of choices where we spend our minutes. I can only speak or choose for me where I spend my time and energy. Time is my most valuable commodity and once gone can never be gotten back. At an average of two and a half minutes a post you only spend 190 hours a year posting or about four hours a week, Kudos to you on your management and organization skills.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Post #: 24

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 7:15:17 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Guide Goddess, your lovely sentence structure doesn't hide your disdain. Why spend any time here at all?

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to theGuideGoddess)

Post #: 25

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:17:10 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

I definitely agree: subtlety, intelligence, humility are traits to be cultivated. And wet dream profiles are definitely a turn off and unsophisticated IMHO.

Your profile looks good to me, Tony. You come across as a decent and balanced guy. I'd just inject a little humour in it if it were mine. This would help to give the reader the impression that you'd be good company chatting over a glass of wine in a bar (which is something that happens even in D/s relationships!). It would also help to counter the image many have of submales - as 'heavy' and overly-serious. (Which, admittedly, many of us are, unfortunately.)

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to PainObjectForUse)

Post #: 26

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:28:28 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

There's a reason there's a FAQ at the top of the forum screaming READ THIS FIRST. What, you thought we just put it there a a part of some clever marketing ploy designed to trick you into wasting a half hour of your life? Go read it.

Profile Help: How to Attract a Dominant Woman
CMail Help: How to Contact a Dominant Woman

Sylvere,

I can understand why you get so pissed off about all this. I do recall the time and effort you put in to get that FAQ together. I wish I could think of a way to make that sticky at the top of this forum even more noticeable - jeez, would 'Do NOT ask a question here till you've read the FAQs!' fit as a subject line?

Maybe others, including myself, could get in earlier with such threads as this, to say 'Please read the fjoeken FAQs!' I do understand that people want to engage with femdoms here on a real-time and personal basis, but I also understand why it can be such a royal pain in the arse that newbie subs, especially, don't read the FAQs.

Well, whatever. Just to say 'thanks again' for that work you (and others) did, way back then. It remains much appreciated.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 27

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:28:28 AM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: theGuideGoddess

I do not come to the forums often as I grow weary of the bitchy a.h. way that the people respond to newbies. Many who have been involved and are extremely active (like I wonder: Do they actually HAVE a life?) with thousands, even tens of thousands of posts under their belts. I dislike when people are rude and snappy without provocation. I see it here frequently. If they are weary of the thread or question then they should PASS IT UP! There is no thread police telling anyone that they absolutely have to post on every or any thread.

I thought about responding to this but then decided not to waste my time. I don't believe in mythological creatures like goddesses, so I'd just be talking to myself. I'm trying to get actual, paying work done today. I don't have time for conversations with imaginary beings.

(Procrastination, thy name is CollarMe!)

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl

"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to theGuideGoddess)

Post #: 28

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:35:33 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline

*snort*

PEON!! Dang it!! Colin is cute and all...but ABS, man.. ABS!!!

_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 29

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:38:56 AM

HannahLynHeather

Posts: 2950
Joined: 4/4/2011
From: where it's at
Status: offline

quote:

'Please read the fjoeken FAQs!'

or maybe just post a reply like this:

For FAQ's sake, read the FAQing FAQ you FAQer

_____________________________

clique? i don't need no stinking clique!

fuck a duck ~w. disney

My Twitter: http://twitter.com/HannahFuck

i hope you enjoyed the post, and as always my friends....have a nice day

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 30

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:41:54 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Guide Goddess, your lovely sentence structure doesn't hide your disdain. Why spend any time here at all?

Heh. It does make me chuckle, you know, Lady Hib. So many femdoms have professed to me, privately, that they're embarrassed about the nicks that they first took. All these grandiose titles - ouchies! How do you write to each other, privately, without cringing? Do you femdoms whitter with each other privately about make-up, clothes, exciting new cosmetic ranges, particular men's 'soulful' eyes or 'chiselled nostrils' (and all the other garbage women standardly burble on about when they think men aren't listening), while addressing each other as 'Lady X' or 'Goddess Y'?

Another question: Why is it that there are so many 'Ladies', and so many 'Goddesses' - but almost nothing in between? Where are the 'Countesses', 'Princesses' and 'Queens'? Supposing a sub, like me, thinks that he might be able to do better than a mere 'Lady' but isn't quite good enough for a 'Goddess'? Eh? Eh??

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 31

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:51:27 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

I don't have time for conversations with imaginary beings.[/size][/color][/font]

What, like those who use mystical-and-faery-like, Gaelic-sounding, nicks even though they're American?

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 32

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 8:53:06 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

quote:

'Please read the fjoeken FAQs!'
or maybe just post a reply like this:

For FAQ's sake, read the FAQing FAQ you FAQer

No need to be common about it, Hannah.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to HannahLynHeather)

Post #: 33

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:01:57 AM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

I don't have time for conversations with imaginary beings.

What, like those who use mystical-and-faery-like, Gaelic-sounding, nicks even though they're American?

My family is mostly Scottish, Irish and Welsh and I married into one of the largest Scottish clans. I still have relatives across the pond. Consider the nom de plume homage to my ancestry.

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl

"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 34

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:09:43 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Guide Goddess, your lovely sentence structure doesn't hide your disdain. Why spend any time here at all?

Heh. It does make me chuckle, you know, Lady Hib. So many femdoms have professed to me, privately, that they're embarrassed about the nicks that they first took. All these grandiose titles - ouchies! How do you write to each other, privately, without cringing? Do you femdoms whitter with each other privately about make-up, clothes, exciting new cosmetic ranges, particular men's 'soulful' eyes or 'chiselled nostrils' (and all the other garbage women standardly burble on about when they think men aren't listening), while addressing each other as 'Lady X' or 'Goddess Y'?

Another question: Why is it that there are so many 'Ladies', and so many 'Goddesses' - but almost nothing in between? Where are the 'Countesses', 'Princesses' and 'Queens'? Supposing a sub, like me, thinks that he might be able to do better than a mere 'Lady' but isn't quite good enough for a 'Goddess'? Eh? Eh??

LOL! My name is Francine, and that's how I introduce myself everywhere. Imagine my amazement when I found that FRANCINE is a rather popular name amongst the crossdressers! And you thought they were all Tiffanys and Laceys! So, I took my other name, Hibiscus, which is my nic on the doll collecting boards. You guessed it, someone ELSE was Hibiscus! Grrrrr. So, Lady I became, and as a clergy person, I am entitled to the title.

My Dagonian relations are just country landowners, though, not the royals that have my last name. Not surprising, it's just a color name.

My FIRST nic on here, was SADISTIC PRINCESS. Far more descriptive, I think, than plain old Hibbie! I would still be that, if not for certain moderators that took a dislike to me. Then everyone could snark me for being all about MEEEEEEEEE!

And I am. I think. When I remember.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 35

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:10:28 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

My family is mostly Scottish, Irish and Welsh and I married into one of the largest Scottish clans. I still have relatives across the pond. Consider the nom de plume homage to my ancestry.

Oh right. Sorry, Sylvere - I kind of assumed that your ancestry was mostly American. I stand corrected.

_____________________________

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(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 36

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:16:15 AM

LadyConstanze

Posts: 9722
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

Guide Goddess, your lovely sentence structure doesn't hide your disdain. Why spend any time here at all?

Heh. It does make me chuckle, you know, Lady Hib. So many femdoms have professed to me, privately, that they're embarrassed about the nicks that they first took. All these grandiose titles - ouchies! How do you write to each other, privately, without cringing? Do you femdoms whitter with each other privately about make-up, clothes, exciting new cosmetic ranges, particular men's 'soulful' eyes or 'chiselled nostrils' (and all the other garbage women standardly burble on about when they think men aren't listening), while addressing each other as 'Lady X' or 'Goddess Y'?

Another question: Why is it that there are so many 'Ladies', and so many 'Goddesses' - but almost nothing in between? Where are the 'Countesses', 'Princesses' and 'Queens'? Supposing a sub, like me, thinks that he might be able to do better than a mere 'Lady' but isn't quite good enough for a 'Goddess'? Eh? Eh??

Depends on the culture but the Lady thing goes back when Dom or Domme was treated like a dirty word, also the translation of the Latin Domina, Lady of the manor kinda thing, Goddess used to be code for an advanced age group or/and a rather advanced weight range (think more Venus of Willendorf and less Venus of Milo), think goddess worship.

Now there are a lot of princesses about, usually the bratty princess kind who wants you to give her all your money and drain your wallet, if that floats your boat...

_____________________________

There are 10 kinds of people who understand binary
Those who do and those who don't!

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(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 37

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:17:53 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Now there are a lot of princesses about, usually the bratty princess kind who wants you to give her all your money and drain your wallet, if that floats your boat...

See, that's why I wasn't too eager to be a Princess, though it IS on my profile line. There is a lot of "spoilt princess" perception, instead of the Princess/Knight thing that is my dynamic. It's work being a Princess!

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

(in reply to LadyConstanze)

Post #: 38

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:20:37 AM

PeonForHer

Posts: 19612
Joined: 9/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus
So, I took my other name, Hibiscus, which is my nic on the doll collecting boards.

You do 'doll-collecting'? *Chortle, snurgle, stifled-guffaw* - a femdom who collects dolls?

Lady Hib, femdoms may collect whips, knuckle-dusters, crossbows or guns. But they *do not* collect dolls, for feck's sake.

Jesus, you femdoms really need sorting out. For a small charge, I shall help you all with your images.

_____________________________

http://www.domme-chronicles.com

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

Post #: 39

RE: Profile DO's and DOnt's - 7/15/2011 9:27:10 AM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

Oh right. Sorry, Sylvere - I kind of assumed that your ancestry was mostly American. I stand corrected.

You're half right. My branch of the family came over during the colonial period so we're American. However, there are more of us who never left the British Isles. My grandmother could give you the whole geneology from Robert the Bruce on, but I only know a few highlights.

E2A

quote:

Lady Hib, femdoms may collect whips, knuckle-dusters, crossbows or guns. But they *do not* collect dolls, for feck's sake.

Well hell...remind me not to show you my collection of stuffed animals then.

< Message edited by SylvereApLeanan -- 7/15/2011 9:29:57 AM >

_____________________________

Sylverë
Dark Muse
30 Fluffy Points
Grumpy Cat is my spirit animal.
Shadow Governess & Mean Girl

"There's something that doesn't make sense. Let's go and poke it with a stick."— The Doctor

(in reply to PeonForHer)

Post #: 40

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