RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (Full Version)

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imperatrixx -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:11:23 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RqrCompanionS

Well, deary, if I am looking for a dance partner, I want to see them dance. If I am looking for a maid, I look at the neatness of their tools and home or office. If I am looking for a chauffeur, I look at driving records. In other words, some evidence that they can do what they say I should want them for.

If I am looking for a submissive, I look for an attitude that says that they will respect me and will submit, and, if they come to me, and, expect me to believe that is what they are, they will damned well be on their best behavior.



You know, you could just as easily turn that around and say that if someone's looking for a dominant, they look for an attitude that says they will respect the submissive's boundaries, limits, and comfort zone, and that if you come to them expecting to be a dominant you damned well better be on your best behavior.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:36:33 AM)

What about Maestro? How come Doms never want to be called Maestro?





SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:37:53 AM)

Because it's gay.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:39:02 AM)

No, it's Italian.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:40:15 AM)

I rest my case.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:41:28 AM)

What's so gay about being Italian?




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:44:36 AM)

Fabio.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:46:47 AM)

Ouch! good point. I still don't care, if I were a Dom I'd be Maestro......something or other impressive.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:48:36 AM)

How about......Maestro di Dolori nel Culo?




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:50:13 AM)

It's a little long, but I like it. What's it mean?




Musicmystery -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:51:16 AM)

I call strangers "Sir" all the time.

Politeness counts in this world.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:52:00 AM)

It's hard to translate, but trust me, it's really appropriate for you.




Hillwilliam -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:52:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Musicmystery

I call strangers "Sir" all the time.

Politeness counts in this world.


Hopefully, not the female ones.  Tends to piss em off.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:54:19 AM)

Cool! Dolori nel Culo it is. Thanks Suze, you're the bestest!




LadyConstanze -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:55:40 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: imperatrixx


You know, you could just as easily turn that around and say that if someone's looking for a dominant, they look for an attitude that says they will respect the submissive's boundaries, limits, and comfort zone, and that if you come to them expecting to be a dominant you damned well better be on your best behavior.



Online we're all just talking and exchanging ideas, the orientation doesn't matter and to be honest I would feel weird if I would talk to somebody who's an s-type in a friendly conversational manner, in CMail or on the board and they'd all of a sudden start honorifics, that's a dynamic that's completely separate from a conversation, I would be quite surprised...

I always thought that submissives should be at least as picky as dominants, I'm with LP on that, if it would be my tush on the line, I'd make sure the top is as experienced as s/he claims, sane, healthy and all that and nope, I most likely would not rely on the word or a self-appointed title. In a lot of cases it also depends how picky you can be, I've seen quite a few women drifting to BDSM due to the notorious shortness of female tops, enduring that they might have to paddle or spank a guy, but at least this way they get a guy... Or some who have completely crazy ideas (the instant goddesses) that if they just call themselves dominants that all of a sudden guys would lose their eyesight and rationality...

In general, before it comes down to the orientation, you have to mesh as people and be on the same wave length.




SuzeCheri -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 9:56:07 AM)

Don't I know it Blondie, don't I know it.[;)]




myotherself -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 10:08:39 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze



Online we're all just talking and exchanging ideas, the orientation doesn't matter and to be honest I would feel weird if I would talk to somebody who's an s-type in a friendly conversational manner, in CMail or on the board and they'd all of a sudden start honorifics, that's a dynamic that's completely separate from a conversation, I would be quite surprised...



Does that mean I have to stop calling you MiLadyGoddess?

Darn....[:(]




DecadentDesire -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 10:09:33 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: RqrCompanionS

It is not respect for their authority over you - it is for their position. In much the same way you call an police officer "Sir" or "Officer" even if you are away from home, or, he is visiting from another country. It has nothing to do with consent. It is basic respect for a person, acknowledging their position.

And, this, you expecting to be called Ma'am, just highlights exactly what is wrong with you "submissive" types. You expect to be on equal grounds, and, yet, be taken seriously as submissives.


Wow...simply wow....

As a dominant, how much I strongly disagree with this cannot be properly expressed into words.

The notion that you have a "position" as a dominant in the online world that is deserving of an elevated degree of respect is nothing more than an ego-centric delusion. This is why I have such an issue of honorifics outside of the context of my intimate relationships, because typically the people who make the biggest deal about them have the lowest grasp on reality.

Personally, out of the dozens of submissive women I have met, talked to, dated and been with, all of them have started out on equal footing and I have had absolutely zero trouble taking any of them serious as a submissive. Things progressed from that equal footing and a D/S relationship naturally developed as they responded to my character, strong presence, aggressive/assertive personality and the fact that I gave them the oppurtunity to become comfortable with me before making demands of them.


quote:

ORIGINAL: RqrCompanionS
As the old saying goes "Start how you intend to finish."


Simply, awful, awful advice that defies common sense and everything that I have learned about developing relationships with people. Note that key word: "developing".




LadyConstanze -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 10:12:43 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze



Online we're all just talking and exchanging ideas, the orientation doesn't matter and to be honest I would feel weird if I would talk to somebody who's an s-type in a friendly conversational manner, in CMail or on the board and they'd all of a sudden start honorifics, that's a dynamic that's completely separate from a conversation, I would be quite surprised...



Does that mean I have to stop calling you MiLadyGoddess?

Darn....[:(]


Nope, but there is no need to call me "Supreme_Uber_Goddess_of_the_Known_Universe" that would be slightly over the top, though I could indulge you if you send me all your money, the deeds to your house and let me have your dogs and the bunny...




myotherself -> RE: Early Use of Honorifics.. (7/21/2011 10:16:27 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Nope, but there is no need to call me "Supreme_Uber_Goddess_of_the_Known_Universe" that would be slightly over the top, though I could indulge you if you send me all your money, the deeds to your house and let me have your dogs and the bunny...


YOU WANT THE BUNNY??????!!!!!

NOOOOOOO!!!!!




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