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ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

This is NOT another one of those, fat threads...........mmmmmmmmmmmK!

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Look, just wear nothin'. That's ALWAYS gonna be in style. (And it has to match as well, as a side benefit).

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ORIGINAL: RqrCompanionS

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ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

This is NOT another one of those, fat threads...........mmmmmmmmmmmK!

No? I know nothing about any of those "fat threads"; but, I do know that someone compared telling men how to dress to telling women they need to lose weight, and, I am responding to that comparison. If you don't like reading the response, don't read it!

My point is that . well, actually there is more than one point. Starting with the fact that one is about asking someone to alter their grooming, and, one is about asking someone to alter their entire physical and mental being. So, it's not really the same thing.

The other is that it is so much easier to go to a store and buy a new suit, than it is to go to a gymn, doctor, whatever is needed, and, alter one's entire structure - mental, physical and emotional - so, in terms of time, money, hardship, it is nowhere near the same thing.

And, my other point is that, either can be done politely, if the person who wants it done is well-intentioned, so, to say they are equally rude is not accurate, without also saying they both have the potentially to be equally considerate.

In other words, my response was not really about being fat, but, about the comparison, and, was totally on topic. And, anything that may have seemed to be slightly off topic was in response to something someone else posted, which was, equally off topic and didn't seem to phase you in the least, since, of course, it was against fat people and not by fat people. Thank you for failing to notice, in your bigotry.

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Says the obese woman who is damned tired of everybody judging her for what was caused by several horrible people in her life, and, compounding the problem (since it is mostly related to extreme stress and bad doctoring), and, who are never willing to listen, consider that maybe she, as the inhabitant of her body, knows what is needed to be done, and, then, do something constructive rather than something just assholeish.

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I know this seems petty, but what can I say?  It's important to me.

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ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Here is an extreme version.

[image]local://upfiles/223909/02678F433427419B9D5AA68AB59D8313.jpg[/image]

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What's a polite way to encourage someone to invest some money in their appearance?

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I'm glad you don't think that counseling someone on their wardrobe choices is rude & inconsiderate. That, however, is a uniquely female viewpoint. Us men do not get the same sort of latitude. To be fair though, the OP is female and so perhaps she can pull this off in a constructive way.

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ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Go shopping.

Seriously, ask him to go shopping with you one day and say "This would look really nice on you. Why don't you try it on?" and then delight in how well dressed he looks, compliment him. By then he should get the point.

I've done this. My girlfriend had to do it with the guy she is currently dating. I know other women who have done this and it seems to work every time.

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ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

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I know this seems petty, but what can I say?  It's important to me.

don't be so fucking petty....YET.

it's the person you should worry about, not the clothes. good clothes you can get later on at a million stores in town, a good man is just a little fucking harder to find.

put up with it, you'll either find out he's worth it or not, but my guess is if you do anything he'll see it as you trying to "change him" and that's the fastest fucking way to chase a guy off.

if he is worth it, and you figure you're going to keep him, then just fucking buy the clothes you'd like to see him in yourself. he'll wear them, he's a guy, and guys are basically lazy. dominants are too. having somebody else do the annoying shit for you is like, one of the major fucking advantages of having a sub. and most guys who are sartorially challenged don't really like shopping for clothes. so just do it, just quietly take over buying his clothes and shortly he'll just be so amazed at how well you understand his taste in clothing.

sound a little manipulative to you? fucking right it is, but that's the way the game is played. that's how you handle a guy, don't bang your head against the wall of his fucking ego, use it to gently lead him along by the nose.

feminine wiles, you got 'em for a reason, babe. use 'em.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

HWP = Height weight proportional... 20-30% body fat give or take... what most Americans would call "skinny" and what the rest of the world would call "normal".

I'm glad you don't think that counselling someone on their wardrobe choices is rude & inconsiderate. That, however, is a uniquely female viewpoint. Us men do not get the same sort of latitude. To be fair though, the OP is female and so perhaps she can pull this off in a constructive way.

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

OK then. My litmus test for such things...

If you would take him as a life partner whether or not he changes his wardrobe then it's in the acceptable category and offering up your own preferences as a way to make him even more attractive to you is a positive thing.

If, on the other hand, he does not change his wardrobe styles and you would not be willing to spend the remainder of your life with a guy who dresses as he currently does then it becomes "just plain rude & inconsiderate".

@LadyConstanze
HWP = Height weight proportional... 20-30% body fat give or take... what most Americans would call "skinny" and what the rest of the world would call "normal".

I'm glad you don't think that counselling someone on their wardrobe choices is rude & inconsiderate. That, however, is a uniquely female viewpoint. Us men do not get the same sort of latitude. To be fair though, the OP is female and so perhaps she can pull this off in a constructive way.

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He bought clothes, I helped pick them out, my friend who sold them to us got a commission, and my guy got very, very lucky.

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Feminine wiles really do work!

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ORIGINAL: leadership527

I'm glad you don't think that counselling someone on their wardrobe choices is rude & inconsiderate. That, however, is a uniquely female viewpoint. Us men do not get the same sort of latitude. To be fair though, the OP is female and so perhaps she can pull this off in a constructive way.

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I'm glad you don't think that counselling someone on their wardrobe choices is rude & inconsiderate. That, however, is a uniquely female viewpoint.

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ORIGINAL: ChasteDream

I'd find it almost impossible to be seen around with any woman who didn't know how to dress or groom herself properly. I find it difficult to understand why women will be seen around with scruffy guys in ill chosen clothing. How hard is it to take pride in your appearance, and show respect for your partner? And why would you accept less? Ah; because you lurve him! Eugh!