RE: Serial bullies

RE: Serial bullies (Full Version)

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SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:31:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact That is a really extensive article. I was actually surprised at how often deception was mentioned over and over again. Also, I was quite interested in this observation: "c) Feigning victimhood: in the unlikely event of denial and counter-attack being insufficient, the bully feigns victimhood or feigns persecution by manipulating people through their emotions, especially guilt. This commonly takes the form of bursting into tears, which most people cannot handle. Variations include indulgent self-pity, feigning indignation, pretending to be "devastated", claiming they're the one being bullied or harassed, claiming to be "deeply offended", melodrama, martyrdom ("If it wasn't for me...") and a poor-me drama ("You don't know how hard it is for me ... blah blah blah ..." and "I'm the one who always has to...", "You think you're* having a hard time ...", "I'm the one being bullied..."). Other tactics include manipulating people's perceptions to portray themselves as the injured party and the target as the villain of the piece. Or presenting as a false victim. Sometimes the bully will suddenly claim to be suffering "stress" and go off on long-term sick leave, although no-one can quite establish why. Alleged ill-health can also be a useful vehicle for gaining attention and sympathy. snort* Most of that stuff happens right here. Most commonly seen being done by the people complaining the loudest about bullies, power cliques and so-called sycophantic behavior.

DomImus -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:36:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RqrCompanionS Uhm .. interesting article. I just read a very good description of almost everyone I've met on this site, and, most other sites. Not everyone, mind you, but, most everyone And, no, I am not saying everyone on this site or all other sites are bullies. I haven't met everyone. I think it's more that the bullies go out of their way to be met. lol If you stay out of the Politics and Religion forum you don't have to deal with them. [:)]

LadyConstanze -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:42:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan snort Most of that stuff happens right here. Most commonly seen being done by the people complaining the loudest about bullies, power cliques and so-called sycophantic behavior. Oh never, surely you jest?

SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:44:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze Oh never, surely you jest? Would I do that?

LadyConstanze -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:53:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze Oh never, surely you jest? Would I do that? Yes, it's that clever cunning plan again, you are doing it to confuse me again, why do you hate me? Why do you do that to me? Bawahahahahahahaha must go and have meltdown, you bully!!!! It's all your fault, it's everybody elses fault, it's the fault of the whole forum! You're going to burn in hell for doing that to me... Gosh, can't think of anything else, feigning outrage when you're trying to not wet your pants because you're giggling like a loon is not easy....

JanahX -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:58:13 PM)
Howard Hughes was bullied throughout his childhood. And he only ended up wearing kleenex boxes on his feet and lining up milk bottles full of his piss in perfect rows stacked against the walls of his rooms. I dont see the problem with it at all.

LadyPact -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 4:58:51 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan snort Most of that stuff happens right here. Most commonly seen being done by the people complaining the loudest about bullies, power cliques and so-called sycophantic behavior. I agree. A quick little story that crossed My mind as I was reading the link, since it is specifically about bullies in the work place. Every time these situations would cross My desk, I was honestly filled with dread. A 'victim' would come to Me with their complaint about a 'bully'. This automatically meant more work for Me, rearranging people in a department while I did all the background investigating and documenting, checking stories, verifying stories, and all of that jazz. Actually, this happened far more between co-workers that were on the same level (meaning there was no imbalance of power between the two) than against supervisors or team leaders. At least nine times out of ten, after separating the people, resolving the issue in whatever way I had to, etc, at some time down the road, the same 'victim' would be sitting at My desk at another time, with a complaint about another 'bully' who was bothering him/her. I'd have to repeat the process all over again, because you can't ignore that kind of complaint, but in the back of My mind, I knew I was dealing with a "serial victim" and the first person they complained about had to go through all of that crap because the other had that mentality. It was a cycle that they would go through that I could almost set My calendar by because from resolving one conflict, they would be back between two - three months with another one. Oddly enough, the "bully" in each scenario never had trouble with any of the other employees on the site.

SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:03:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze Gosh, can't think of anything else, feigning outrage when you're trying to not wet your pants because you're giggling like a loon is not easy.... You forgot to be devestated, deeply offended, and to declare you are leaving teh intarwebz forEVAH!!!!! (Note the five.) But since you're trying to avoid engaging in nonconsensual watersports, I forgive you.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:06:48 PM)
Now you're just patronizing me so that you don't appear to be a bully.... See my tears, see them? Hope you feel guilty now sniff sniff, and nope, I am not holding an onion, you made that up, see how you are trying to victimize me again?

DarthVaderOfLove -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:10:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth I recently read a book called 19 Minutes which is about a boy who is bullied all his life and ends up shooting walking into school and killing almost all the kids who bullied him so relentlessly. The "voice" changes with each chapter so we get inside his head as well as those of some of those who survive, his lawyer, the prosecutor, etc. It's fiction but because it's so well researched it's easy to forget that. Zeph There's an interesting book called Rage that Stephan King wrote under the name Richard Bachman. I think it's out of print, though, and he told the publisher not to make more. Could probably find it online at used book outlets. It's about a kid who takes his class hostage, goes into detail about what's going on in his mind and stuff. Pretty interesting. I think King has "disowned" it, it was written well before that kind of thing became a common occurrence and he wanted to distance himself from it.

DarthVaderOfLove -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:11:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: JanahX Howard Hughes was bullied throughout his childhood. And he only ended up wearing kleenex boxes on his feet and lining up milk bottles full of his piss in perfect rows stacked against the walls of his rooms. I dont see the problem with it at all. Hahaha! I kind of miss facebook, it's easier to just hit "like".

willbeurdaddy -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:15:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: orchid77 They say half the population is being bullied and don't even know it. http://www.bullyonline.org/workbully/serial.htm Its bullshit, now STFU.

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:18:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DarthVaderOfLove quote: ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth I recently read a book called 19 Minutes which is about a boy who is bullied all his life and ends up shooting walking into school and killing almost all the kids who bullied him so relentlessly. The "voice" changes with each chapter so we get inside his head as well as those of some of those who survive, his lawyer, the prosecutor, etc. It's fiction but because it's so well researched it's easy to forget that. Zeph There's an interesting book called Rage that Stephan King wrote under the name Richard Bachman. I think it's out of print, though, and he told the publisher not to make more. Could probably find it online at used book outlets. It's about a kid who takes his class hostage, goes into detail about what's going on in his mind and stuff. Pretty interesting. I think King has "disowned" it, it was written well before that kind of thing became a common occurrence and he wanted to distance himself from it. I loved that book - yeah I've read everything he's written. I sort of remember reading something about his ordering it to not be reprinted because it had been used as a how to book for school terrorism - for lack of a better word. I'm not 100% sure though.

zephyroftheNorth -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:20:30 PM)
quote: (Note the five.) Ha! Completely off topic but I just had to comment on this, brings back such good times.

LadyPact -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:28:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan You forgot to be devestated, deeply offended, and to declare you are leaving teh intarwebz forEVAH!!!!! (Note the five.) But since you're trying to avoid engaging in nonconsensual watersports, I forgive you. Also forgot to hide the profile so people can't see that your still reading the thread, create a sock puppet for support, and say that you'll go to the means to get the site taken off of the net.

lazarus1983 -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:31:15 PM)
At no time will he ever figure out you guys are talking about him.

SylvereApLeanan -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 5:38:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyPact quote: ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan You forgot to be devestated, deeply offended, and to declare you are leaving teh intarwebz forEVAH!!!!! (Note the five.) But since you're trying to avoid engaging in nonconsensual watersports, I forgive you. Also forgot to hide the profile so people can't see that your still reading the thread, create a sock puppet for support, and say that you'll go to the means to get the site taken off of the net. Oh, go big...create multiple sock puppets, complain about censorship/free speech, and make thinly-veiled allusions to your impending suicide while you're at it. And don't forget to toss in a Hitler/Nazi reference for good measure. [img]http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t174/laurel_ari/icons/animated/drama-llama.gif[/img]

kalikshama -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 7:28:23 PM)
quote: There's an interesting book called Rage that Stephan King wrote under the name Richard Bachman. I think it's out of print, though, and he told the publisher not to make more. Could probably find it online at used book outlets. It's about a kid who takes his class hostage, goes into detail about what's going on in his mind and stuff. Pretty interesting. I think King has "disowned" it, it was written well before that kind of thing became a common occurrence and he wanted to distance himself from it. I remember reading that as a teenager...it's still available on Amazon - prices range from $5.00 to $662.35 (that is not a typo.) King ordered it to not be republished after Columbine. Just had a bit of SK frenzy and downloaded 5 books from the library and put several others on hold. If I have nightmares, I'm blaming you! "The Bachman Books," which contains "Rage," was not available. I actually preferred the movie adaptation of the Running Man, one of the rare times I'll pick a movie over a book. But then, Arnold...

willbeurdaddy -> RE: Serial bullies (7/23/2011 7:59:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kalikshama quote: There's an interesting book called Rage that Stephan King wrote under the name Richard Bachman. I think it's out of print, though, and he told the publisher not to make more. Could probably find it online at used book outlets. It's about a kid who takes his class hostage, goes into detail about what's going on in his mind and stuff. Pretty interesting. I think King has "disowned" it, it was written well before that kind of thing became a common occurrence and he wanted to distance himself from it. I remember reading that as a teenager...it's still available on Amazon - prices range from $5.00 to $662.35 (that is not a typo.) King ordered it to not be republished after Columbine. Just had a bit of SK frenzy and downloaded 5 books from the library and put several others on hold. If I have nightmares, I'm blaming you! "The Bachman Books," which contains "Rage," was not available. I actually preferred the movie adaptation of the Running Man, one of the rare times I'll pick a movie over a book. But then, Arnold... Its avalable as an e-book and as an audiobook at Pirate Bay.

LadyConstanze -> RE: Serial bullies (7/24/2011 12:10:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lazarus1983 At no time will he ever figure out you guys are talking about him. Oh are you seriously suggesting that anybody acts like that?

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