emotional health resources

emotional health resources (Full Version)

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kiarsia -> emotional health resources (7/29/2011 12:38:17 PM)
Ill be the first to usually tell people to log off collarme and find google for these sorts of questions. But my thought process is a little off kilter today and I'm having internet browser problems. Stupid crackberry. Anyway, my husband is retired military so he has VA benefits for service related issues, but he retired from the reserves so he doesn't get full benefits for him or the family until he turns 60. (10 more years) We're broke enough to qualify for the free/sliding scale public services places, but my county is just as fucked up as the rest of the Nation so public mental health services have an 8 month waiting list to get an appointment. We could really use a marriage counselor right now but we are running out of options. Can't exactly go to my pastor either and explain how swinging and fetish differences are part of what's tearing us apart. Anyone have any other suggestions of where to go? Husband refuses to use the VA mental health services for himself because he's convinced he'll lose his gun rights. Definite possibility. But things can't keep going. I'm tired. I'm emotionally fried. I've lost 7 pounds since last friday. I can't eat I can't sleep I can't think. I can't even format decent sentence structure to get this post out well. If this is the end I just want it to be over.

angelikaJ -> RE: emotional health resources (7/29/2011 12:47:21 PM)
Mail

JstAnotherSub -> RE: emotional health resources (7/29/2011 2:20:08 PM)
You can dial 211 from anywhere in the US to get in touch with the United Way. Maybe they could help.

kalikshama -> RE: emotional health resources (7/29/2011 4:34:45 PM)
quote: Husband refuses to use the VA mental health services for himself because he's convinced he'll lose his gun rights. I imagine he'd have to be a "danger to self or others" for that to happen. I've seen a VA social worker and psychiatrist and nobody took my gun rights away. I make too much money to qualify for free and have an entirely reasonable copay of $15 for most things, but nothing for the social worker, which may or may not be a clerical error. Mine was BDSM friendly, which was good because I was able to say to the VA GYN, these bruises you are about to see occurred under safe, sane & consensual conditions, and if you have any concerns, talk to Stephen (the social worker), which she did and he reassured her not to worry. Anyway, sound like he's making excuses - what does he care about more, his guns or his marriage? Best of luck to you - feel free to PM me if you'd like.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 1:23:20 AM)
That was one thing that totally sucked about returning home from Petaluma when both us living together cause his landlod wouldn't approve it. I had just found a kink friendly therapist, close by who would see me for a dollar, because her sliding scale could go that low. Our last therapist was not kink aware but she was open to us talking bout those areas if our life and learning about it an asking questions she may have had. Try looking for counsolers who do online sessions maybe?

Iamsemisweet -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 8:00:46 AM)
There has to be some kind of low income social services available. What about arranging to talk to a clergyman at a different church? I am not a church goer, so I don't know how that works. Maybe your husband should call the NRA legal department and find out how serious the treat of him losing his guns is. I personally doubt that a troubled marriage is sufficient reason to have the state take your gun rights away. I think there would have to be a legal proceeding. Sounds more like an excuse than a reason to me. Sorry for your troubles, I hope you find the help you need.

Toppingfrmbottom -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 10:54:02 AM)
Iamsemisweet, a lot of mental health programs got axed when budgets got bad. To many people in need with to little resources. Though your idea of trying another person not affiliated with her church might help, but I think clergy would frown on activities like swinging and bdsm.

littlewonder -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 11:58:39 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Toppingfrmbottom Iamsemisweet, a lot of mental health programs got axed when budgets got bad. To many people in need with to little resources. Though your idea of trying another person not affiliated with her church might help, but I think clergy would frown on activities like swinging and bdsm. Not all churches. I can think of a few that wouldn't blink an eye. As for VA services, I've gone to VA services for mental and physical health and have yet to ever have a problem with them except that you wait all day to get in and unfortunately their services are sometimes inadequate which is why i stopped using them but unless they find your husband to be a threat to himself or others they won't take away his gun. Besides as one person here put it, which is more important to him? You/the marriage or his gun? That should tell you a lot right there.

Iamsemisweet -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 12:13:18 PM)
I agree. I am not suggesting she go to her local Baptist church (no slight intended against Baptists). But I know there are some very open minded and open hearted churches around. If her husband is so inclined.

hausboy -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 6:33:04 PM)
Sorry to hear about your situation. You can try 211 but know that 211 is not funded in all states and all cities. Locally, our 211 lost their grant funding for awhile, but has recently been re-funded so it's back running again. Are you employed? If so, does your employer have an EAP? (employee assistance program) Many of these offer free services, including couples counseling, at least up to 3 visits, then from there you can get a low-cost referral and/or coverage depending on your plan. Local health departments (again, depending on your town) sometimes offer support for low-income families. You may find, however, that the waitlists can be as long as those from social services. Check out local listings in your free paper for Support Groups. While never a replacement for a professional and one-on-one counseling, there are marriage support groups that may offer you some assistance until you can get the benefits you need. Check out your local MCC Church if you have one--they are Gay/Lesbian friendly, and I have often found them to be Leather friendly as well. my best wishes to you both that you can work things out edited to add: almost forgot---some hospitals offer counseling and support groups for all types of problems--you can also see what offerings they have. If you have a local university/college that has a social work school, many of them have support groups (moderated) to allow students to do internships. not the best, but a band-aid solution in the meantime.

dcnovice -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 6:37:08 PM)
quote: Husband refuses to use the VA mental health services for himself because he's convinced he'll lose his gun rights. Is he more concerned about losing his gun rights than his marriage?

HeatherMcLeather -> RE: emotional health resources (8/10/2011 9:40:11 PM)
I'm sorry if this is way out in left field, I really don't know a thing about gun rights or the American health system, but if the VA mental health services could take his gun rights away, then couldn't any mental health person do it as well?

barelynangel -> RE: emotional health resources (8/11/2011 5:21:05 AM)
Ask your pastor for a referral. He should understand that you all just aren't comfortable talking to him but he probably has a list of referrals of all kinds of support groups, people etc. Also, your PCP may have some referrals also. And while i don't have it handy, i know someone has the link that gives names of kink friendly therapists and doctors in each state.... even if you can't afford them, you may be able to call them and see if they have referrals. angel

Iamsemisweet -> RE: emotional health resources (8/11/2011 7:23:55 AM)
Yes, if this was a valid concern. Which it isn't, unless there is more going on than she is saying in her thread. I guess I am still hung up on her being unwilling to go to her clergyman. Why would you be part of a group that disapproves of something that is important to you? quote: ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather I'm sorry if this is way out in left field, I really don't know a thing about gun rights or the American health system, but if the VA mental health services could take his gun rights away, then couldn't any mental health person do it as well?

wolf223 -> RE: emotional health resources (9/1/2011 7:33:25 AM)
His gun rights aren't in any danger unless he is committed for mental issues or abuse.

Termyn8or -> RE: emotional health resources (9/1/2011 9:39:51 PM)
FR YOU ALL SAY his gun rights are OK and he has nothing to worry about, and you are full of shit in most states. There is a charge called "Having a weapon under disability" which could make it a FELONY for him to be in possesion of a firearm. Even in his own home, unless he has the wherewithal to fight it under castle doctrine. THINK you know it all. Talk about me giving advice. Look, just bring the problem here. We got nothing better to do. Fuckit, you are totally anonymous unless you decide otherwise. You can say any goddamn thing you want except for very few. This forum is the counsellor. After all 11,000 brains are better than one, even if half of them ain't working right. Stay away from those suits. T^T

Endivius -> RE: emotional health resources (9/1/2011 10:30:21 PM)
Kiarsia, there is a VA hospital that has a privately funded program that is exclusively open to Vets to help with mental health disorders and will not cost you one cent. There is no waiting list, however, you will have to pay for him to fly to hawaii to enter the program. If you would like more information send me a mail.

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