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One of the things I do on my job is help my clients write wellness recovery action plans. These are essentially just lists about what keeps them well, how they know when they getting sick, what to do when they start getting sick, etc. Any, the reason I bring that up is because when I was training for the job, the trainer mentioned that he and his wife have a wrap for their marriage. Now, as far as I know, their's is a vanilla relationship but if it helps a couple to write down what to do in the case of an argument, how money is to spent, what to do if one becomes unhappy in the relationship, etc., then why wouldn't it be an excellent idea to write those things down for a bdsm relationship?