Wishing you well (Full Version)

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LadyNTrainer -> Wishing you well (7/31/2011 9:22:15 PM)

I expect this will also be deleted in short order, so I simply wish you all well who are reading here while you can still see this.  I'll miss chatting with you. 







HannahLynHeather -> RE: Wishing you well (7/31/2011 9:40:52 PM)

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[image]local://upfiles/1188372/C39893162C424FD8B193B77ABA647729.jpg[/image]




CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: Wishing you well (7/31/2011 11:08:26 PM)

I guess I missed a train wreck somewhere in these boards.

LNT, you are one of my favorite posters...and will be missed.  Best wishes to you and yours.




DarkSteven -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 12:58:31 AM)

Uh...sounds like you're leaving?

I'll be sorry to see you go.




HannahLynHeather -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 1:33:38 AM)

oh come off it! she's just being overly fucking melodramatic. she got all butt hurt because some thread got pulled and she thought her posts were such masterpieces that it was some horrendous crime not to preserve them for the enlightenment of us plebes.

so she started a thread bitching about it and demanding an explanation as to why the mods had done what they did and threatening to leave if they didn't. that thread got pulled as well, so she's now got some sort of persecution complex going.

good bye and good fucking riddance i say, she takes this shit way to fucking seriously, it's just a fucking net forum, none of what any of us say on here is of any real importance. it doesn't fucking matter. these aren't doctoral theses we're doing here, they're forum posts.

later lnt, come back when you regain your perspective and get the fuck over yourself.




Phoenixpower -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 1:39:26 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia

I guess I missed a train wreck somewhere in these boards.

LNT, you are one of my favorite posters...and will be missed.  Best wishes to you and yours.



what she said [:o]




LadyConstanze -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 3:18:57 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

I expect this will also be deleted in short order, so I simply wish you all well who are reading here while you can still see this.  I'll miss chatting with you. 






Why should it be deleted?




RapierFugue -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 3:46:21 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

oh come off it! she's just being overly fucking melodramatic.


<taps dial forlornly>

There's another Irony-O-Meter that'll never play the piano again. Poor thing never stood a chance.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather
good bye and good fucking riddance i say, she takes this shit way to fucking seriously, it's just a fucking net forum, none of what any of us say on here is of any real importance.


That's one way of putting it, yes. Another would be to understand that some people on planet earth have enough empathy to understand that any form of communications medium inevitably has an effect on the other person(s) if one chooses to be rude, unpleasant or aggressive to them. On those occasions where I post something rude to someone (and I do that from time to time, of course I do), I'm under no illusions that it’s not, at that moment at least, either a) mocking or b) personal.

I've seen the "it's all just words on a screen" defence used so many times, by so many fundamentally damaged individuals, that it no longer really registers with me, other than as (yet another) indication that the person posting it has issues of their own.




HannahLynHeather -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 4:18:09 AM)

quote:

I've seen the "it's all just words on a screen" defence used so many times, by so many fundamentally damaged individuals, that it no longer really registers with me, other than as (yet another) indication that the person posting it has issues of their own.
oh for fuck's sake, i didn't say anything of the sort, and unless you took a stupid pill this morning you are well aware of it. what i said, and quite clearly i think, was that what we post isn't of any great importance, the world will get by without our words of wisdom just fine. it doesn't matter if they are deleted now and then. especially if the whole fucking thread is pulled..

that's what her whole noble martyr schtick is over, a few deleted posts, it has nothing to do with anybody being rude or insulting her.




RapierFugue -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 4:23:16 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: HannahLynHeather

oh for fuck's sake, i didn't say anything of the sort, and unless you took a stupid pill this morning you are well aware of it.


Ignoring (yet again) your insults, it's difficult to interpret the phrase "it's just a fucking net forum, none of what any of us say on here is of any real importance. it doesn't fucking matter" in any other way than the one I described.

Perhaps you might wish to think slightly longer and deeper before posting, if (as you claim), your point was a different one.




LadyHibiscus -> RE: Wishing you well (8/1/2011 6:06:50 AM)

I gather a thread went away, and LnT took exception to it, since she had made her typically solid and well thought out contributions. Such is life, sometimes a thread gone wrong cannot be salvaged.




Focus50 -> RE: Wishing you well (8/2/2011 5:09:49 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I gather a thread went away, and LnT took exception to it, since she had made her typically solid and well thought out contributions. Such is life, sometimes a thread gone wrong cannot be salvaged.


I've had my differences with LNT but yeah, she makes quality and insightful contributions to these discussion boards.... Soooo much more desirable than the rabid delivery of "my way and the wrong way" intolerances of many a recent post - usually garnished with everyone's favourite new adjective, "fucking"....

But I hope it isn't just because of the passive/aggressive nature of CM's current moderation.... errrrr..., "style".... Had some experience of that in my own thread a month or so ago - "Dommes and Doggystyle". Was one part mature discussion to about 3 parts disruption/hijack/personal attacks/diatribe. Got to about 14 pages before the Mod *finally* stepped in, only to gut it to about 12 pages and lock it. A day later, another full page was gone....

LNT (if you're still out there), Mods come and go; don't be defeated by some overly officious bureaucrat whose judgement seems tainted with the power and self-importance of it all. It's a seasonal thing - and seasons inevitably change!

Focus.




CynthiaWVirginia -> RE: Wishing you well (8/2/2011 4:46:22 PM)

It was because her posts were pulled when she didn't violate TOS, that someone else in the thread did.  When she asked why, she said she didn't get any answer.

I believe a lot got yanked until the mods could sort it out and put some back, and who knows how very busy they might have been elsewhere in the threads at the same time.  Most, if not all, of her posts were put back but...this is a trust issue now.  Also, I don't know what "an unstable platform" means, even if I have that right.

Sometimes I have spent about an hour writing a reply and my computer froze up and it all went poof...it was very upsetting. 

I am glad her writing was put back, as it might very well be the last we hear from her and I will miss her posts so much.  [:(]




LadyAngelika -> RE: Wishing you well (8/2/2011 4:51:15 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

I gather a thread went away, and LnT took exception to it, since she had made her typically solid and well thought out contributions. Such is life, sometimes a thread gone wrong cannot be salvaged.


Indeed. I've taken breaks from this place, but it wasn't because of threads being pulled. As you said LadyH, such is life! We move on.




RapierFugue -> RE: Wishing you well (8/2/2011 5:25:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: CynthiaWVirginia

I am glad her writing was put back, as it might very well be the last we hear from her and I will miss her posts so much.  [:(]


It'll be the norm from here on in. Mods have disengaged from bringing abusive and aggressive posters to book, and from here it'll just slowly wind down as people decamp to elsewhere as the LCD mentality takes over.

I've seen it happen on a few other (non-BDSM) boards in my time, and recognise the symptoms. To be fair, CM forums have been declining for a while, and these are just the death throes.

"The public wants what the public gets" ;)




LadyPact -> RE: Wishing you well (8/2/2011 6:33:05 PM)

For what it's worth, here's My five cents.  (Up from two because I know this is going to be a bit long.)

If anybody missed what's happening, here's a quick recap.  This is just My perspective, so if you disagree, I'll be more than happy to hear other views.

We started with thread A.  I don't think thread A was a great original.  This is, in part, because thread A was very poorly presented.  Had the author done a better job in expressing her point, the thread wouldn't have gone down the tubes as quickly as it did. The original in and of itself wasn't a blatant TOS violation, but at least some of the replies were bordering on it, if not crossing the line.  Thread A was temporarily pulled to clean it up. 

I'm going to pause right here for a moment because I actually agree with that method.  In My opinion, temporarily pulling a thread to fix it up (or locking it for a duration) seems to be the best way to handle such things.  It falls into the 'work smarter, not harder' category.  I won't speak for the Mods, but when I have a project, I only want to do it once.  I wouldn't want to have to go back over the same thread, with people still contributing while I'd be working on it, replying to stuff that I was in the middle of removing, etc.  As I'm very familiar with <smirk> if you quote something that gets pulled, that comment has to be pulled too.  I wouldn't want to have to do that.

During the clean up phase of thread A, thread B gets started to ask why thread A is gone.  In My opinion, this is not the best approach.  As I said on thread B before it went away, I tend to just contact VAA and ask  why a thread went gently into that good night.  I do this not because I don't want to deal with the Mod who pulled the thread, but sometimes, because I just don't know which Mod did what and I know that VAA has always said that she will answer such questions.  Maybe I'm wrong but this approach has worked for Me on a number of occasions. 

In the meantime, thread A gets put back within a decent time frame.  Thread B goes away.  I'm on the fence about this.  While 1) the issue didn't really exist anymore, so some could say thread B wasn't needed and 2) thread B should have probably been posted in off topic, there are two ways to see that decision.  Not everybody knows how to handle these situations, even though it's been publicly stated a number of times.  Sure, *I* know to contact VAA and so do a number of forum regulars, but somebody who doesn't spend time reading threads in other sections might not.  I lean towards moving such threads to the appropriate forum with the link showing where it has gone. 

Thread C is this thread.  In this, while I also enjoy LnT's postings here, she might just be making the best decision for herself.  Not because of the threads in question, but because of how the topic of thread A (or at least what seemed to be interpreted from it) has been one of the issues that makes her unhappy with this site.  She has often mentioned not liking the a/s/l search criteria ability here and not being happy with what she deals with on her social profile as a result.  Maybe more than most.  I won't speak for LnT directly, as we haven't discussed the matter.  Still, I could see why she would prefer to leave this site and spend her time at one that is more suited for her.

In either case, all of the best, LnT.  Do what is the best fit for you.




Steponme73 -> RE: Wishing you well (8/3/2011 3:17:37 PM)

Thank you LadyPact for explaining what happened. It seems we had one poster on here who went a little overboard on her response. LnT always has been respectful to me so I have no dog in this race. However, if she feels that she has been wronged she should sort it out with the Mods...not us. I don't think she will go away, but if she should decide to do so, I wish her the best of luck.
P.S. One of us needs to take a Chill Pill....




domiguy -> RE: Wishing you well (8/3/2011 3:23:44 PM)

LnT...never heard of her. Beat it.




PeonForHer -> RE: Wishing you well (8/3/2011 3:46:00 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyNTrainer

I expect this will also be deleted in short order, so I simply wish you all well who are reading here while you can still see this.  I'll miss chatting with you. 



What the *hell* happened here?

Lady N, I shall miss your posts mightily. You put a lot of thought into them. I know that the matter of communication means a lot more to you than it does to many, and I think I understand why.

And, yep, when it comes to the posts of some people - of whom you're one - it does feel like I've watched an act of vandalism when I've seen them wiped.

To me, this all seems a pretty damned sorry state of affairs. And I guess I won't ever find out what happened because . . . the relevant words have all been deleted!








domiguy -> RE: Wishing you well (8/3/2011 4:14:15 PM)

seems like it could have been handled much better. This site has become fairly irrelevant anyways.




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