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Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 8:28:26 AM   
bearthugs


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I don't know if this is the correct place for a question like this, but I'm sure the people here are more open-minded than most, and will be OK with me asking. Have anyone ever really wanted to be the opposite sex? I know I've always (as long as I can remember, at least) wanted to be a woman. I have even said that if I was a woman, especially a pretty one, I would be sooo promiscuous. I would love to be used sexually by women and men. But, I'm not s girl. And, while I am more submissive, I'm not wanting to be just used like I would want if I was a girl. Anyone else have feelings like this?
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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 9:17:02 AM   
LaTigresse


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Nope, not I. I am happy with what I've got.


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 10:54:49 AM   
LadyHibiscus


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There are some trangendered folk on the site, but not as many as elsewhere.

I am entirely female, and grateful for it.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 11:50:36 AM   
SweetieinControl


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What causes you to believe you'd be more promiscuous and would want to be "used" more if you were a woman?

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 11:51:34 AM   
hangemhigh1953


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I went through a phase where I thought I was TS but then I came to the conclusion that it's silly to let my gender define me somehow.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 12:28:14 PM   
bearthugs


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It's just how I imagine (fantasize) I would be. Part of it is watching porn. I have imagined what the girl would feel like, especially when she's being used.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 1:03:21 PM   
BurntKitty


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That's the problem with many people. Their perceptions are clouded by porn. Turn off the computer, meet real people, go to munches and talk to them.

By the way, born female, love it, and totally prefer monogamy.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 1:22:44 PM   
DesFIP


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You might benefit from talking to a counselor who specializes in gender dysmorphia issues.

About the porn, it's written for men who wish women would feel like that. Most of us don't. If you did go through gender reassignment the odds are this scenario would no longer appeal to you. Instead like most born females, you would find nsa much less attractive than sex inside a relationship.


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 2:13:08 PM   
SweetieinControl


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 2:13:28 PM   
DomImus


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bearthugs
Have anyone ever really wanted to be the opposite sex?


Only when I get pulled over by a cop.




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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 2:19:28 PM   
whiteslavebitch


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I wanted to be a boy when I was 6, my father wanted to have a son, and I also noticed
how differently boys and men were treated at that time (respected, catered to, etc.)

I grew out of that, though, and am very happy to be a woman.

< Message edited by whiteslavebitch -- 8/24/2011 2:20:30 PM >


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 2:20:14 PM   
Hillwilliam


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bearthugs

It's just how I imagine (fantasize) I would be. Part of it is watching porn. I have imagined what the girl would feel like, especially when she's being used.

Put on a wig and lipstick and let a buncha guys assfuck you then report back.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 3:04:54 PM   
tj444


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quote:

ORIGINAL: whiteslavebitch
I wanted to be a boy when I was 6, my father wanted to have a son, and I also noticed
how differently boys and men were treated at that time (respected, catered to, etc.)

I grew out of that, though, and am very happy to be a woman.

Me too, I noticed boys were treated differently.
One Christmas there was a dolly sitting on a big yellow dump truck. The dolly was for me and cuz she was sitting on a dump truck i figured that was mine too. Apparently not! I would have much preferred to have the dump truck than the dumb old dolly (once you cut their hair off they are useless)... I used to like to play with the dump truck in a big pile of sand we had... I have grown up and that changes things a bit, now i want a (real) bulldozer/backhoe combo.. much more practical...

I love being a girl, I like being used and enjoyed and adored (only by the right guy in a monogomous relationship).. but i do think like a guy at times.. which I like also.. best of both worlds..

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 3:17:39 PM   
siamsa24


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I have wanted to be a boy for as long as I can remember, but I am still a girl, why? Because that's what's expected. 
I can't explain it, but I have always wanted to be a man somehow, not anyone specific, just me, but a man. 
No matter what I feel, I am still married to a man, have been pregnant three times, have one daughter and live as a woman.  I can't really explain it, but that's how it is.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 3:17:41 PM   
hausboy


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OP: 

hmmm. yikes.

first things first. there's your fantasy world...and the real world.  In your fantasy world, you can do and be whomever you want.  And  if that means your fantasy is to be dressed like a promiscuous 21-year old and used sexually by men and women....that's entirely possible given you either pay for it...or find those interested in fulfilling that fantasy with you because they enjoy sissy scenes, etc.  You can be that woman (even if just for a few hours) if that's all you want to fulfill those needs.

That said....
it's completely different from GID: Gender Identity Disorder (once called Gender Dysphoria).  If you are female in your brain, and you are having serious anxiety, stress and depression over being stuck inside a male body that feels completely incongruous with your birth sex  then GID is potentially the reason.

Do you dislike your male body?  The way it looks? The way it smells? The way it feels?  Do your male clothes disgust/repel you?  Do you feel like no one really sees who you are because they keep seeing you as male?

I'm not talking about sex here...I'm talking about just the mundane.  Walking down the street...do you cringe every time someone calls you "Mister" or "Sir"?

Take the sex out of the equation for the moment--how does it feel just living in your skin?  You want to be a pretty woman.  The reality?  All women want to be attractive.  (and men, for that matter)  No one ever says they want to be ugly or unattractive.  There's no way of knowing if you would be pretty or not after gender transition--if you feel so strongly that you are female, then I strongly suggest examining it both with a licensed professional and with a support group.

Lastly--forget the porn.  Porn is great for wanking off, not making life choices. No matter how much money you have, you will not look like the women in the porn flicks.  Hell, most biological women don't look like the women in the porn flicks. Is the only time your gender bothers you during porn watching?  Or is it 24/7?  I can tell you that for me...and many, many transgender friends,  the gender pains were in our face, all the time, 24/7/365 and it was constant struggle.  I transitioned not because I wanted to, but because I had to.  I couldn't live in that hell much longer and hold on to my sanity. It pervaded every aspect of my life with no escape.

Gender is a continuum.  It's not all black and white.. not all male and female....there are plenty of people who fall somewhere on the spectrum in between, and don't define themselves as either.  Only you can know what's best for you, but personally, a licensed therapist (pref. one familiar with GID) is a good place to start.

edited for typos


< Message edited by hausboy -- 8/24/2011 3:19:24 PM >

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 3:20:12 PM   
DarkSteven


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Forget it.

I have a close friend who is trans. She spent her whole life hating her body and wishing she were a female. She knows of several who killed themselves rather than continue.

Eventually she went on hormones. She was terrified that her family and friends would disown her. That didn't happen, and she's getting more comfortable as a woman every day.

None of her feelings about gender were sexual at all. It was just not feeling right as a male.

You sound like a cd more than anything else.

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 5:31:34 PM   
0ldhen


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Cute rabbit!

Remember fantasy an actually doing the act are often two entirely different things.

Here is a link, it has listings for counselors who specialize in GID;

GID counselors

< Message edited by 0ldhen -- 8/24/2011 5:32:00 PM >


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 7:31:32 PM   
hausboy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: 0ldhen


Cute rabbit!

Remember fantasy an actually doing the act are often two entirely different things.

Here is a link, it has listings for counselors who specialize in GID;

GID counselors


oh man...it's a rabbit?  I had to go back and look. First glance, I thought it was a parrot...I gotta get new glasses...

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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 8:03:06 PM   
Aswad


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I would imagine the appeal is partly a sort of egotistical empathy, in the sense of having the same male drives and such, but desiring to live both physical sides of the male experience, and to heighten the male experience through how one fulfills the female role in a way a woman might not. Also, the female has a different set of sensations, the nature of which I expect most men will have wondered about at some point, if not so persistently. Plus, there are matters of how men often idealize and objectify women sexually that can play into the imagined experience, as well as the lack of a refractory period and so on.

Finally, from a male perspective, the female form is beautiful and sublime.

I'm quite happy as a man, but I wouldn't mind taking a female body for a test drive, so to speak. Or to spend a day with a female equivalent of my own mind to learn more about women (walking the proverbial mile in another person's heels). Neither is anything I would have wanted on an ongoing basis, however, much as the physical form appeals to the sense of aesthetics. See, the rest of the aesthetic is quite enamored with the male symbolism of penetration, and not on the receiving end (no aversion, just don't get a kick from it; I got a free banana at the store for swallowing it whole). In nature, there doesn't appear to be such a thing as a "best of both worlds" option.

Health,
al-Aswad.


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RE: Desire to be the opposite sex - 8/24/2011 8:24:33 PM   
LanceHughes


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I'm voting for female robin AND for DarkSteven's suggestion (not spelled out) of cross-dresser.

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