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PeonForHer -> RE: Big difference between master and mistresses looking for slaves (9/5/2011 2:47:07 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Lockit
I have dated, seen and been with unemployed men from the start and during the relationship. I would do it again if I believed the man was actually trying to make it in life and wasn't looking for a stupid mama to take care of him, while reaping in the benefits of a stupid mama. I'm not stupid. I am compassionate and understanding... but stupid is accepting a man that has failed to thrive in life with no good reason and by choice.
I wish that sort of comment had come at the beginning of this thread. From these forums, I've come to know femdoms who've been anything but money-grabbing - quite the opposite, in many, many cases. Some all-round, excellent women.
Jesus, sometimes I think, 'There but for the grace of God I could have gone'. I *could* have chanced upon the personals and thrown myself into dating, without bothering to talk on these forums at all. If I'd started chatting with my first femdom, (or should that be 'femdom'?), and she'd tried the old bait and switch . . . to be honest, I think that would have been end of it. I'd have given up, entirely, believing that my idea of a D/s relationship - that is, one in which people are partners - was just a pipe dream. That really is what I used to believe; that really is just how cynical about D/s I once was, and easily shattered my hope was, back then.
As a submale, self-hatred is never all that far away. There's *always* going to be a little voice that whispers, every now and then, 'Matey, you're just not a real man, are you?' Even for me that's true, and - modesty aside - I'm one of the toughest there is. Not in the same league as Otters, say, but pretty up there. You have that, and your first and biggest experience of femdoms is one of those parasites - you just *will* have an explosion of bitterness and cynicism. You just think, "Ah, right. I'm showing my cunt-side, so that's how I'm going to be treated. Right enough, why would I ever have expected anything else but to be treated like a cunt?"
I do understand why some femdoms react with cynicism and bitterness, too, though. God knows, I'm aware of the stories, some in quite a lot of detail. And I wouldn't want to begin to lecture people who feel like they're being tarred with the same brush. If I were one of those good and decent women who happens to be a femdom, and with whom I've spoken here, it's quite likely that I, too, would get utterly inflamed by some ignorant herbert turning up and lumping me together with the bloody limitless number of parasites that infest the personals side of CM.
However, I just cannot see that bitterness and cynicism gets lessened by bitterness and cynicism in response. All it does it make *everyone* feel worse, and worse, and worse.
I wish I'd been one of the first to answer the OP. Then I could have spoken to him, knowing something of his feelings and experiences, but also knowing something of all you good women, too. That's all.
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