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Just curious - 9/10/2011 10:23:30 AM   
Trestiese


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/7/2011
Status: offline 		Orgasm control? I want to learn about it, but I guess I don't fully understand it. I have tried to control m own orgasm, but always fail at it. Tried clenching my muscles, relaxing my muscles and just plain breathing, but nothing works. So, I am wondering, how do you control an orgasm?
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RE: Just curious - 9/10/2011 10:30:35 AM   
SimplyMichael


Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
Status: offline 		First off, I don't condone cheating and any "wonderful dom" willing to help someone do so has questionable ethics in my opinion.

But I love orgasm control so I had to post.

There is no "one way" to do anything and what works for one might fail for another.

Since it sounds like orgasm control is a hot fantasy for you, thinking about it makes it easier to cum and the desire to do so greater. In your case, my guess is you are doing this while masterbating...so stop masterbating, do something less intense. Or you can pinch your cunt lips, clit, or nipples.

I gets more complicated when you are just telling someone not to cum. Combinations of the above physical training, a bit of "funishment" and the understanding it isn't black and white, meaning you don't beat the bitch if she cums because the goal is to keep her riding a razor's edge of pleasure.

(in reply to Trestiese)
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RE: Just curious - 9/10/2011 11:28:48 AM   
Trestiese


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/7/2011
Status: offline 		I respect your opinion, due to the fact that everyone is entitled. I do no disagree about the cheating and I will not make excuses about it. It is my burden if I choose to follow through with it, which I have not at this point in time.

I appreciate you eduating me a little about orgasm control. It is indeed a fantasy of mine. But like I said, I have Always failed at it. So again thank you for your input.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)
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RE: Just curious - 9/10/2011 1:50:24 PM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		Not a master but having some experience in orgasm control, it's a different beast if you're solo, than when you are with a partner, at least in my experience. It's not just about the willpower to stop the process, but in some ways it can be about -enjoying- the ache from being denied.
If it's only for yourself you're doing it, then a lot of self exploration is probably required, everyone is different as SimplyMichael said, so 'know thyself' is very important for this one.

If you're interested in someone else controlling your orgasms, denying it or forcing it, you have to be conditioned by them, and from my experience it most certainly is 'conditioning'. My own conditioning was never 'complete', I've been told for some people it just doesn't happen, for others it does. It's something you just have to experiment with and see how it goes.
The approach that we took was to associate pleasure with certain looks, touches and phrases, and denial or 'downers' associated with other triggers. It's definitely not a 'casual' 'sometimes' thing from my experience, but then maybe I was a tough nut to crack.

< Message edited by ProlificNeeds -- 9/10/2011 1:51:41 PM >

(in reply to Trestiese)
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RE: Just curious - 9/10/2011 4:02:42 PM   
Trestiese


Posts: 3
Joined: 9/7/2011
Status: offline 		Thank you so much. I appreciate any input I can get. I am completely new to anything remotely resembleing this lifestyle, and I have my curiosities. Orgasm control, as I have said, is a fantasy of mine. And it is always solo. My bf is vanilla without a kink cell in his body. So, so far any of my curiosities have been explored on my own.

(in reply to ProlificNeeds)
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RE: Just curious - 9/10/2011 4:55:01 PM   
Mr4sg


Posts: 99
Joined: 9/2/2011
Status: offline 		Basically its about practise.
Stimulation to just before, then cutting back and maintaining at lower levels.
Sometimes a shift in position works. Avoid repeated motions tho ..


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Don't argue with idiots. It lowers you to their level where they beat you with experience.

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RE: Just curious - 9/11/2011 12:36:56 AM   
foxling


Posts: 34
Joined: 6/17/2011
Status: offline 		I'm useless at doing it for myself. If I decide to play by a rule I've made up for my own amusement (ie, when he's not given any instructions beyond giving permission to masturbate or when I was single) I normally decide to deny myself X amount of times before letting myself orgasm. Typically, I get to the first stopping point and just think "hey, I don't have to stop! I can orgasm now!" and give up on any game I was thinking about playing to. It's very different when he's set the rules and has given some order on it. Desire to obey him is greater than the desire to orgasm. It's an area I think I'd have difficulty exploring as a single person or as someone in a vanilla relationship. I think that there's a big possibility it might be different for you, but there's my 2c.

(in reply to Mr4sg)
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RE: Just curious - 9/11/2011 3:02:50 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Trestiese

Orgasm control? I want to learn about it, but I guess I don't fully understand it. I have tried to control m own orgasm, but always fail at it. Tried clenching my muscles, relaxing my muscles and just plain breathing, but nothing works. So, I am wondering, how do you control an orgasm?


The trouble with doing it to yourself is that, ultimately, you're gonna cave in and go for the big orgasm finish. If you're on your own and thinking about orgasm control, then you're thinking about orgasm. Now if it's me controlling my girl's orgasm, I'm still gonna let her go there in the end, but my "fix" comes from her writhing and begging etc so I won't be in such a hurry to let that happen.

And we doms obviously need other means of control than the self-clenching of muscles and breathing techniques etc. The act of habitually being dominated and deferring to the other's will etc will have you focused on much more than just your own carnal pleasure. As a submissive, you should know or will quickly learn that anything you crave or enjoy will be turned back on you for the dom/me's own sadistic delight. That orgasm control is no longer a physical act or technique as it is when it's just you.

Focus.

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Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to Trestiese)
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RE: Just curious - 9/11/2011 6:19:32 AM   
HeatherMcLeather


Posts: 2559
Joined: 5/21/2011
From: The dog house
Status: offline
quote:

So, I am wondering, how do you control an orgasm?
I don't, I just enjoy them and let them take me away. To me orgasm control is letting them control me, I absolutely love being cummed into oblivion. One orgasm after another faster and closer together until they just merge into one long rippling floating soaring orgasm that lasts and lasts until in the end your brain overloads and you just pass out. YUM!

(in reply to Trestiese)
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RE: Just curious - 9/12/2011 7:12:58 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Trestiese

Orgasm control? I want to learn about it, but I guess I don't fully understand it. I have tried to control m own orgasm, but always fail at it. Tried clenching my muscles, relaxing my muscles and just plain breathing, but nothing works. So, I am wondering, how do you control an orgasm?


Mix pleasure/pain until her head is derailing. Bring her to edge, dismount, 10 strokes on the snatch until shes screaming and twisting and, if she could, would give anything to cover her cunt. Then mount back up. Bring her to the edge. Rinse. Repeat.

Or, if she's a greedy undisciplined bitch you can go the other route. Forced orgasms until she's groveling to not cum anymore and her shit is getting chafed and raw.


_____________________________

"One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die. "
HST

(in reply to Trestiese)
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RE: Just curious - 9/12/2011 9:19:19 AM   
winspiritsbaby


Posts: 141
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: HeatherMcLeather

quote:

So, I am wondering, how do you control an orgasm?
I don't, I just enjoy them and let them take me away. To me orgasm control is letting them control me, I absolutely love being cummed into oblivion. One orgasm after another faster and closer together until they just merge into one long rippling floating soaring orgasm that lasts and lasts until in the end your brain overloads and you just pass out. YUM![/color]



Sounds DREAMY!!

Back on subject, my orgasms are far and few between so orgasm control is a hard limit of mine. I would think though, it would be much easier to accomplish if ordered to do so. Like others have said, if you are doing it of your own accord, you're probably not in the right headspace for it knowing full well you can give in at anytime. Just my

(in reply to HeatherMcLeather)
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RE: Just curious - 9/12/2011 4:49:52 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		He uses a wooden spoon when I'm on the edge and can't stop. Those suckers hurt!

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Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to winspiritsbaby)
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