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MasterG2kTR -> The Shit List (10/5/2011 8:35:35 AM)
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This is a classic that I haven't seen in a long time, but while digging thru some of my archives I spotted it and thought it was worth posting.....enjoy
btw....this might require the standard food and beverage warning....
*The Shit List*
GHOST SHIT: The kind where you feel the Shit come out, but there is no Shit in the toilet.
CLEAN SHIT: The kind where you Shit it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
WET SHIT: The kind where you wipe your butt 50 times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you won't ruin them with stains.
SECOND WAVE SHIT: This happens when you're done Shit-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize that you have to Shit some more.
POP-A VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD SHIT: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.
LINCOLN LOG SHIT: The kind of Shit that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the toilet brush.
GASSY SHIT: It's so noisy, that everyone within earshot is giggling.
DRINKER'S SHIT: The kind of Shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.
CORN SHIT: Self explanatory.
GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-SHIT SHIT: The kind where you want to Shit but all you do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.
SPINAL TAP SHIT: That's where it hurts so badly coming out, you'd swear it was leaving you sideways.
WET CHEEKS SHIT (The Power Dump): The kind that comes out so fast, your butt cheeks get splashed with water.
THE DANGLING SHIT: This Shit refuses to drop in the toilet even though you are done Shit-ing it. You just hope that a shake or two will cut it loose.
THE SURPRISE SHIT: You're not even at the toilet because you are sure you are about to fart, but *oops* --- a Shit!
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