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Hillwilliam -> Things you'll never hear a southern boy say. (10/7/2011 1:08:24 PM)
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THE TOP 31 THINGS THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:
31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.
30. Oh I couldn't do that, she's only sixteen.
29. I'll take Shakespeare for $1000, Alex.
28. Duct tape couldn't possibly fix that.
27. Come to think of it, I'd prefer a Heineken
26. We don't keep firearms in this house.
25. You can't feed that to the dog.
24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
23. Wrestling is obviously fake.
22. We're vegetarians... by choice.
21. Do you think my gut is too big?
20. Nope, I believe I'd prefer grapefruit & whole wheat toast for breakfast.
19. Honey, we just don't need another dog.
18. Who gives a damn who won the War of Northern Aggression? That's Ancient History!
17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
14. Trim all the fat off that steak first, please.
13. Cappuccino is superior to espresso.
12. The tires on that truck are too big.
11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.
10. Unsweetened tea tastes better, and is more healthy.
9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
7. Checkmate
6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
4. I don't have a favorite college team.
3. You Guys. (Gice)
2. Those shorts maybe ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:
1. Nope, no more beer for me. I'm fixin' to drive a whole bus load of my Buds down to re-elect OBAMA!
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