RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame?

RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (Full Version)

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kalikshama -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 5:05:18 AM)
One of the very few things I like about FL is all their relationship options. It was very sweet when my new D and I changed our profiles to "Dom of..." and "Submissive of..." We're poly, but noted in our profiles that we were involved. Although I can see where littlewonder is coming from: quote: Master has never changed his profile. I never asked him about it, never really cared to be honest. It's still the same way as when I met him. It doesn't bother me at all. I know who he's with, I trust him. The few seconds of effort it took to update a profile really meant a lot to me.

MasterofRopes66 -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 12:23:56 PM)
I haven´t had a special timeframe, since I´m only looking for partners within the BDSM-community, abandoning vanillapartners a long time ago. The context in which we make contact is in BDSM/kink, so this can start directly in the first planned playmeeting! Prior to first planned playmeeting there´s always weeks/months of aquaintance by mail/Internet and often a first IRL-meeting done, where no play at all is planned whatsoever. If first IRL-meeting says OK for both parties we´ve gone home to me or the female directly or planned a separate playmeeting in future. On that meeting kink/BDSM has always happened. Penetrating sex(my cock meets her pussy) I can do without for months in a new BDSM-relationship if I´d have to for some reason, as long as kink/BDSM is fully functioning... MP.

SailingBum -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 12:40:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RopePlease I mostly want to wait because i'd rather have good sex with someone then bad sex...[:)] How are you gonna know if it going to be good sex by waiting???? BadOne

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 2:01:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SailingBum quote: ORIGINAL: RopePlease I mostly want to wait because i'd rather have good sex with someone then bad sex...[:)] How are you gonna know if it going to be good sex by waiting???? BadOne Check the basement for pods, I'm agreeing with Badass The Sailorman!! [:)] What you get from waiting is anticipation, which is fun and all, but doesnt last. If he or she has no skills, they will not magically acquire them while you were waiting. So wait, but don't get your hopes up.

kiwisub12 -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 2:44:00 PM)
When i was a sweet young thing - many years ago - i didn't have sex on the first date, or even the second, but after a nasty divorce, and ten years of abstinence, sex is no longer a mystical experience - its a physical , intimate act that brings pleasure. As such, if i am dating someone, and i like them and feel attracted to them sexually and physically, then what the hell? Sex is fun, even when its awkward and inept. Now ....... trusting someone with my heart and mind is a completely different thing! I'd rather have sex with you than tell you my deepest darkest secrets and let you into my head. To love you and trust you is going to take way more time than when we have sex........ and full out submission even longer.......................

Kaliko -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/11/2011 6:38:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kiwisub12 When i was a sweet young thing - many years ago - i didn't have sex on the first date, or even the second, but after a nasty divorce, and ten years of abstinence, sex is no longer a mystical experience - its a physical , intimate act that brings pleasure. As such, if i am dating someone, and i like them and feel attracted to them sexually and physically, then what the hell? Sex is fun, even when its awkward and inept. Now ....... trusting someone with my heart and mind is a completely different thing! I'd rather have sex with you than tell you my deepest darkest secrets and let you into my head. To love you and trust you is going to take way more time than when we have sex........ and full out submission even longer....................... I am going in the exact opposite direction. I had sex much more easily when I was younger. Now, it's much more of an experience of my mind and soul rather than just my body. If I'm having sex, I'm only having sex as someone's submissive. And if I'm someone's submissive, I have A. taken the due time to determine that I want to be his submissive or B. have been so overtaken by him as a person that I am throwing all caution to the wind - a very special man, indeed. I'm having a much harder time now, than when I was younger, being able to have sex just for sex's sake. I have my whole self wrapped up into it.

SimplyMichael -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/13/2011 1:32:39 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kaliko quote: ORIGINAL: kiwisub12 When i was a sweet young thing - many years ago - i didn't have sex on the first date, or even the second, but after a nasty divorce, and ten years of abstinence, sex is no longer a mystical experience - its a physical , intimate act that brings pleasure. As such, if i am dating someone, and i like them and feel attracted to them sexually and physically, then what the hell? Sex is fun, even when its awkward and inept. Now ....... trusting someone with my heart and mind is a completely different thing! I'd rather have sex with you than tell you my deepest darkest secrets and let you into my head. To love you and trust you is going to take way more time than when we have sex........ and full out submission even longer....................... I am going in the exact opposite direction. I had sex much more easily when I was younger. Now, it's much more of an experience of my mind and soul rather than just my body. If I'm having sex, I'm only having sex as someone's submissive. And if I'm someone's submissive, I have A. taken the due time to determine that I want to be his submissive or B. have been so overtaken by him as a person that I am throwing all caution to the wind - a very special man, indeed. I'm having a much harder time now, than when I was younger, being able to have sex just for sex's sake. I have my whole self wrapped up into it. Isn't B the whole point?

ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/13/2011 2:03:55 PM)
Forty years ago I used sex as a form of highly pleasurable entertainment. I wasn't seeking a relationship and so sex was "just sex" to me, and I was excruciatingly honest about that. Appropriate for that time and place, perhaps. Now? Sex has to mean something to me. I have to love the person before I have a need to seek that level of intimacy. We have to be good friends as well. As some know I was married for 20 years to my first dominant. Great sex, absolutely fucking fantastic sex the entire time we were together. But I figured out far too late, he didn't like me. We could not be friends. And of course, I evolved to a place where that was not enough for me. The man I am with now, we have been best friends since we met. No matter what happens now or in the future we will always be the best of friends. For me and where I am now in life, that trumps everything else. Soooo...in answer to the question I have to say: "It depends." Helpful Chatte

mons -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (10/19/2011 4:07:01 AM)
I believe in waiting and if that person wants something fast go to KFC! i find many men think becasue i am a dominant i am willing to just go for it.and whip them! No waiting is best and when you wait it is better and you do feel safe! i am on the safe and sane side of this! Just wait and then have all of the fun things you waited for ;0)

sweetkarmen -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (11/23/2011 6:58:17 PM)
I've enjoyed reading this thread. Yes, it does depend. My longest relationship began as a one night stand, however, we had been acquaintances for about a year prior to our getting together. It was not meant to be a one night stand, I just did not care one way or the other if we ever had sex again. Well, he did care. He pursued me and the next thing I know, 9 years had passed. I don't know if that would be classified as a one night stand since I knew him for a year. I vote for waiting. To me, waiting is about you're being comfortable enough with that person to trust him with your mind, body, heart and emotions. We all reach that point at different times and rates so Viva La Difference. Karmen

Aileen1968 -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (11/23/2011 7:19:31 PM)
If he didn't fuck me by the second date I was gonna dump his vanilla pussy ass. [:)]

Lockit -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (11/23/2011 7:20:27 PM)
[:D][:D][:D][:D][:D]

stellauk -> RE: Sex/kink expected within a time frame? (11/23/2011 8:20:08 PM)
Intimacy for me is more about two people lying together with two naked souls, sharing the experience, than two people lying together with two naked bodies, sharing the experience.

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