RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (Full Version)

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HisPet21 -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 7:43:22 PM)

You can't do porn and go into a health profession. It will either (a) bite you in the ass or (b) haunt you with the fear that it may bite you in the ass. If I were you, I'd pick one or the other. Do you want to be a pornstar or a nurse?



Madame4a -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 7:43:46 PM)

I'm not clear on the nexus between doing porn and getting your D/s needs met.. perhaps your needs are really SM and not D/s? Maybe you don't know...

getting offline and meeting others is more likely to help and is probably safer on several levels...

there is more to offline BDSM than munches...



LafayetteLady -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 7:48:00 PM)

I don't really mean this in a bad way, although I know it is going to sound that way.

You use the term "despair" in the title of your thread. Really? I know it can be really tough to have to live without having your needs met, not being able to find that "right" person. A lot of people here do. But living without it until it is right will pay off in the end. You might not necessarily regret jumping into the porn industry, but it isn't going to meet those needs you need met.

If you really think they will, why not just have some "play" dates without the relationships? Those meet your needs as well, and keep your career aspirations, whatever they turn out to be, completely open.



kalikshama -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 8:24:13 PM)

quote:

I've been viewing their work and I know that they will be able to satisfy my quest to let myself be myself (a submissive.)


I wouldn't bet on it. You may get to explore bottoming, but submission is doubtful. You can surely go to a local play party and get the same dynamic. My personal experience is that submission is very different in the context of a relationship.



NewImprovedDom -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 8:38:14 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: egregiousGEM22

So I have been on this site for some time (since I was 18) on and off.

So in an effort to quench my deviant thirsts, I've be playing around with the idea of doing some work with kink.com.

Any input here?


If by "quenching your thirsts" you were referring to some masturbatory fantasies about being an S&M porn star then I can understand this.  Lots of little girls fantasize about being a porn star. Its perfectly normal.
But  I can't believe you would ever carry this idea out from under of your own bedsheets. According to your profile you've been fantasizing about having any kind of BDSM relationship for "almost a decade" without ever taking that first step. And that can be considered normal too. Many people wait a long time to begin to act on these urges we have.
But until you can do your first local 'amateur' scene I seriously doubt any real possibilty of traveling from Scranton to San Francisco to work with the pros.  And they are pros who have no need of  hesitant beginners because they have plenty of other pros in the porn industry to choose from in California.
But no need to be in a rush....you're young and you will have plenty of time to fulfill your every desire someday.



lizi -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 8:47:21 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: egregiousGEM22

Thank you for that insight. Coming from somone who is in the profession I wish to persue, you have really made me think twice.

Once again, thanks!



Something else to throw in on this subject for you to consider....I'm in school for healthcare right now. I competed for and obtained a position in a highly competitive program, and upon sending in my acceptance I had to give my ok for them to run a background check on me. Also, we have to volunteer as part of our school requirements. It was extremely hard to find a place to accept me and they ran their own background check on me too. We're told that when we get to doing our clinicals, its not unusual for them to do the checks as well. Basically I could be checked every 6 months or so for the next 2 years. Just take that into consideration. You have no idea how hard I've worked for this, I'd be distraught if my life choices prevented me from getting to follow through on what I rightfully earned.



JanahX -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 8:53:15 PM)

quote:

I mean, will my future Dom look at me differently for doing this? I know I'm mentally prepared to do it, but the possible repercussions are haunting me. I am 100% honest with those whom I talk to so I wouldn't keep this as a skeleton in my closet.


Let me look into my crystal ball .... hmmmm .... looks cloudy.
The tarot cards read ... huh ... not sure.

How the hell would I know? I guess the best answer to if your future dom will look at you differently is : flip a coin. Heads - yes, Tails - no.
Or get a magic 8 ball, I hear those are pretty accurate.

oh and since you are young ... secret of the south: Dont mess with Texas, .. no no no wait a minute,
oh yeah -
You dont have to tell everyone everything about you all the time. Sometimes its a really good thing to just keep shit to yourself.
and this means forever and ever.

[image]local://upfiles/1059980/D58B1E7C58914E9AB6F99D61F4C4EDF0.jpg[/image]



Awareness -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/11/2011 11:15:41 PM)

  In short, no.  It's a phenomenally bad idea.

Once pictures are out, there's no bringing them back.   That narrows your options, which is never wise.

Second, if your desires are getting the better of you, then your judgment will fail.  It's imperative that you learn the importance of applying a filter to the men you interact with and discern ways of finding the type of men you want.  Patience is mandatory.  Without it, you will inevitably make poor decisions.



Tristan -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 5:36:45 AM)

You say you can't find a good dominant on this site.  Have you thought about expanding your search through vanilla dating sites?  A submissive friend I know uses words like "I'm not a vanilla girl anymore" and stuff like that on her vanilla profile to help find others that would be a good match.  She's had some success with her expanded search.



Kana -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 6:04:55 AM)

1-I've played with, owned, gals who have done scenes with Kink and insex and it didn't bother me a bit. In fact, at first, and especially when I was younger, it was kinda hot, in an ego boosting sort of way. I mean what guy doesn't like going into a dungeon with a chick that 1/2 the guys there have fantasized about and wished were theirs. Instead, she was mine. And you could watch em drool. Yeah, that was fun. That said...
2-You are a lunatic if you think you can do this and folks won't find out. This is the net, Things go up there, they stay there forever. Repeat forever. Even if it doesn't get used against professionally it will certainly alter the way that co-workers view you, and not necessarily in a good way.
This just isn't a good idea. It's one of those plunges that, once taken, can never be recovered from. If you just need your itches scratched, there's lots of better ways.
And, as Michael notes, what Kink does is porn. It's plotted, pre-written scenes. It's not BDSM, it doesn't have that connection between two folks that lies at the heart of TTTWD.

edited cause Kana obviously needs coffee to spell correctly



kalikshama -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 6:46:15 AM)

Ya, that's what I did - he was on FL, I'm here, and we met on OKCupid :)

I said something to the effect of "I like dominant guys. If you know what SSC and RACK mean, drop me a line."

Are there any Pennsylvanians who can help the OP find a munch or TNG group near her in Scranton? I'm getting results like "Scranton International (AVP) to Boukhalef (TNG) flights," lol



tolovetolaugh -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 7:10:13 AM)

Well scranton is right near where I play paintball... I can grab her up next time I am going and she can atleast embrace her masochistic side in a game of painball!

[:D]
ETA
Two girls... in bikinis and masks in the middle of winter, shooting at each other straight on until one screams for mercy.
Lets see you'd get your maso in, a bit of cold play, humiliation when I win... And considering the ratio of men to women, free beer the rest of the weekend for your inner attention slutty fucking whore!



littlewonder -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 8:37:35 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

Ya, that's what I did - he was on FL, I'm here, and we met on OKCupid :)

I said something to the effect of "I like dominant guys. If you know what SSC and RACK mean, drop me a line."

Are there any Pennsylvanians who can help the OP find a munch or TNG group near her in Scranton? I'm getting results like "Scranton International (AVP) to Boukhalef (TNG) flights," lol


http://www.domsubfriends.com/cgi-local/wwwdir/db.cgi?db=org&uid=default&state=PENNSYLVANIA&view_records=View+Records&ww=on

Any of the ones near Philly would work. I think the Black Phoenix is still up and running. Not sure about the others. I haven't gone to a munch there in many years. I suggest the op go down the list, join the groups and see if they are still functioning.



Contentment -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 10:11:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: egregiousGEM22

No I don't currently attend local munches. I think I'd feel like a rabbit amongst wolves.


And you think kink.com won't make you feel that way?

Looks like you'd be a rabbit amongst wolves in that crowd...not just think you were.



egregiousGEM22 -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 12:05:35 PM)

Thank you for all your insight and information. It's official, I'm not going to do it. I will not let the need to release overwhelm me.


tolovetolaugh- I'm up for paintball!!!!


Maybe I'll check out the munches in NYC since that's the area I'm most familiar with... With all the diversity there, I'm sure I'll meet at least one person that I am 90% compatable with.


THANK YOU!!!



BossyShoeBitch -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 12:27:24 PM)

Go on Fet Life and talk to Charlotte S. about it. Then you would get the information directly from the source.



ProlificNeeds -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 1:54:51 PM)

Are you looking for a relationship or a thrill? hitting up a filming kink job isn't going to cure the lack of a stable relationship.

Go to events and munches for people in your area if you want to meet someone decent to find a relationship. Go to Kink if you want to be a porn star. From my POV the two have little/nothing to do with eachother.



tolovetolaugh -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/12/2011 2:33:07 PM)

OP you have mail on the other side :)



kalikshama -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/13/2011 8:48:00 AM)

WIN!



GreedyTop -> RE: On a mission to end my despair.... (10/13/2011 9:33:08 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Awareness

  In short, no.  It's a phenomenally bad idea.

Once pictures are out, there's no bringing them back.   That narrows your options, which is never wise.

Second, if your desires are getting the better of you, then your judgment will fail.  It's imperative that you learn the importance of applying a filter to the men you interact with and discern ways of finding the type of men you want.  Patience is mandatory.  Without it, you will inevitably make poor decisions.




maybe I am just tired.. but I find myself agreeing here.

someone shoot me, now ? PLEASE?



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