Help/advice needed (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress



Message

TraciTv -> Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 8:26:01 PM)

I'm not attraciting much attention.

I know that I must be doing something wrong. Could I please have some advice on ways to make my profile for inviting?

Be as blunt and honest as you need to be.



Hillwilliam -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 8:27:56 PM)

Photos help. Also, put up what you like to do in a non kink situation.

Nilla interests, etc.



HannahLynn -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 8:45:11 PM)

its your fucking looks. you are plain, you are forgettable, you look just like every other blank pictureless profile on the fucking site.

look you asked me to be blunt so i will. the fucking odds are stacked against you, here's why.
1. you're 43
2. you're a switch
3. you're a trans

none of those things is all that fucking popular, sorry, but there just is not a fuck of a lot of demand for middle aged trans switches. that may sound harsh, but those are the fucking facts.

given that you are hitting the ice with all that against you, you fucking well have to make your profile shine, and i mean fucking shine. it has to be golden. you have to think of it as a fucking advertisement on tv. which ones do you remember best? the informative and funny ones. so emulate those ones fucker, be funny and informative. make me smile and tell me about yourself. not all the kink shit, tell me what sort of shit we'll be doing when we're not fucking. are you fun person or are you fucking wallflower outside of the torture chamber?

and for god's sake put up some fucking pictures.



MistressDarkArt -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 8:59:17 PM)

Welcome, Traci.

In addition to the challenging ratio of submissive men to dominant women, generally there is not a lot of interest in Tv or Tgs among dominant women. Of course there are exceptions; you may be the perfect person for just such a lady. There are successful partnerships on CM to attest to that so don't give up. Let the person you are shine through on your profile and be patient.



gungadin09 -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 9:00:10 PM)

Extra, extra long interests lists are annoying.  Condense it down to what's important.

Put up some pictures.  They don't have to be of you, but something that expresses your personality.

If tobacco is a  hard limit, you should include that on your limits list.

Glancing at your journals, you seem picky and inflexible about what you want.  As Hannah said, you're going to have a hard time generating interest in the first place.  Being extremely picky and One True Wayish will make it almost impossible to find someone.

Be patient.

Oh, and don't complain about fakes.  It's unbecoming.

Focus less on what YOU want, and more on what you have to offer.

pam



DarkSteven -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 9:02:01 PM)

Agree with the big white cock.  I'm a bit confused because you say you're a slave but describe yourself as a play partner.

I'd describe your envisioned situation.  Will you expect to work outside the home?  Do domestic service?

Also, I'm a bit confused regarding gender attraction.  You say that you're gay, which I assume makes you a lesbian?  You seem to be comfortable serving either gender.  You're also seeking, among other permutations, sub trans and sub/sub couples - why?



MistressLilliana -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 9:20:00 PM)

Definitely make your interest list shorter. You may like stuff but only list what is important. You also need a picture. Unless someone sends a pic with their message to me, i won't reply to those without at least one picture but even then, its best to have a picture up for those browsing through profiles. I also agree that your journal does not match your profile. In your journal you say you are a slave but then your profile says you are a Switch...I also agree that if you're allergic to tobacco then put it in your profile, it'll be noticed better, not everyone reads journals.



Endivius -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/24/2011 9:30:04 PM)

Unless you include cheesecake, you'll never have success. Welcome to CM.



hangemhigh1953 -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 12:57:20 AM)

Sounds really rigid and unapproachable. Try easing up a bit and make it more friendly, so when people read it they feel like they're meeting you in person rather than reading your instruction manual.



OttersSwim -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 5:36:04 AM)

Sites like this have a real limited usefulness for folk like you and me.  If I were single and looking, I would be here, but my real searching would be done at munches, BDSM events, and the like.  If you join Fetlife.com, you can easily find munches in your area of New Jersey.  Find one close to you, send the organizer an email of introduction, and show up.  Be sane, be personable, be fun - above all, be interesting and not completely focused on your kink.

Make friends first.



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 6:03:16 AM)

Listen to Otters. He is the shiznit.



peppermint -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 7:12:01 AM)

If you really wish to attract attention then one of the best ways is to participate in the forums. People will notice thoughtful intelligent posts around here. Some Dominant might decide you are very interesting and want to know you better.



TraciTv -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 8:39:34 AM)

Thank you, all of you for your input. Even the less than kind replies were quite useful.  I've shortened my list, will be revising my profile, and posting some pics this weekend.



EmilyRocks -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 5:22:52 PM)

I didn't notice any less than kind replies. I guess it depends on one's perception. If you plan on wearing panties, I strongly suggest you choose the big girl variety.



TraciTv -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 6:29:09 PM)

Who lit the fuse on your tampon, emily?



ChatteParfaitt -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 7:09:31 PM)

That would be me. If you have issues with the way I light a tampon, pls express them here.

Shame on you , you got some really great input, most of which was towards the positive. You received some wonderful replies, and you chose to pick on someone who was just there to rant (rat) on.

Loverly,

I hope to (not) find you in my dreams.

Chatte



TraciTv -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 7:20:03 PM)

I answered a snarky reply with one of my own.  There is no shame in that. 




tiggerspoohbear -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 8:02:11 PM)

I read Emily's post, if you think that was a snarky reply, then you should check out some of the other threads.  She was trying to be helpful and it may be considered blunt, but it's not snarky by a loooooooooooong shot.



HeatherMcLeather -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/25/2011 11:18:05 PM)

Heather's choice for the

Sunny's Quote of the Day
goes to
EmilyRocks
[sm=ass.gif]
for this very profound advice


If you plan on wearing panties, I strongly suggest you choose the big girl variety.




TraciTv -> RE: Help/advice needed (10/26/2011 4:25:17 PM)

Okay, okay!!!!

Uncle!!!!   LOL!!!!

apologies to emily, thanks to all.

I've taken your advice and it has already made a world of difference.  Thank you, all of you.



Page: [1] 2   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
0.046875