A Feeling of longing

A Feeling of longing (Full Version)

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Tine11 -> A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 2:08:17 AM)
Today, i am moving out the dorm and 5 hours away from the community in which have grown to love over past 5 months. have been left with a since of longing and only wishing that i could run away to were i feel comfortable. I know form what i have felt over the past months. When on campus i felt slightly out place and i could not be myself (ya for conservative private schools), but i always able to look forward to driving up to the city for the weekend, and learning, watching and experiencing all in a effort to grow. With time so did my feeling that the lifestyle as whole is were i belonged. I am just not sure how i will be able to cope with 3 months of not being able to see my friends up their, feeling like i am nut understood my family, and not being able to let my hair down so to speak. Any suggestions? edited for massive spelling errors Disclaimer: this girls ability to spell is not her fault

CanadianGuy -> RE: A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 2:15:49 AM)
I can't really understand your question. I'm not sure if it's the spelling (sorry, but it makes it hard to follow what you mean when many of the words don't make sense) or if it's just the fact that you didn't make it clear what you want people to reply to. Sounds like you're not sure where you belong. Good luck in your search, I guess. Without knowing you, the cities in your area, and your connections, nobody here is likely going to be able to tell you where to go or what to do with your life.

becca333 -> RE: A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 2:19:06 AM)
Cyber can be a lifeline. Keep in contact that way - it's better than nothing. Could you find like-minded people close to home? When you left to go to college you were a kid, you probably weren't aware of the possibilities, or even of your needs at that time. Now, with the knowledge you have, you know what you're looking for - there could be a whole BDSM community around you that you could tap into. Visits? Three months is a long time, surely there's a reason you need to travel there? If all else fails - Get a big calendar and cross off the days. Three months isn't forever. Have a great time, look around for some like-minded people, and ... you could always come clean with your family, it'd almost be worth it for the looks on their faces!

shivvy -> RE: A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 3:03:55 AM)
i still live at home with my mum and dad and my little girl. my mum and dad are the type of people who would eva understand how i feel, or why i am like i am. if my daddy eva thought some bloke woz hitting me or abusing me, regardless if it woz wot i needed or longed for, he would just go ape. there woz a thread in one of these forums about "coming out", and i thought that woz really interesting, even if you don't feel like you can to everybody. i woz a part time slave for 18 months a while ago, and to be honest, now there is like this HUGE hole in my heart, and even though i had vanilla bfs since, there has ALWAYS been something missing. i'm afraid you just gotta do wot you think is the right thing hunny, and if you're like me, you'll prolly wanna put how everybody else feels before how you feel. all i can say is i feel for you, and i wish you luck really. all the best. luv, shiv xx

Tine11 -> RE: A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 4:16:15 AM)
For the record mom knows, but does not truely understand, nore do think she ever will. I did tlry to see about the community were i would be, but once i was foiled by things out of my control. The job i ahve this summer, pays well but has me work 6 days a week and about 60 hours a week, and their would be no way in hell i woudl be able to get off to actually go. But you are ight its not forever, and i have done good job, that hint, hint phase of if youwantto even be able to see you ahve to come to me. Somehow got teh hope that id di not make thorugh processing for this job and would have search for anther one adn then could spend summer wiht friends. but hey life sucks than ya die. Thanks shiviy, i am glad to know i am not the only out their that feels like this.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: A Feeling of longing (5/26/2006 5:45:30 AM)
Be as independent as possible. Live at home as closely to a "tenant" situation as possible. Be respectful (I'm going out with friends and will be out late) but not asking for permission. Do ALL of your own chores, including going grocery shopping if you can. But make a night every week together just to sit with the family and hang. Not sure about your transportation system, but there's always biking to get you OUT of the house if nothing else. It won't be easy- for family OR for you to readjust, but stay firm and respectful, use your job as your "way out" and before you know it, summer's over!

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